Update 2024-03-27: Greatly expanded the "Samples" page and renamed it to "Glossary".
Update 2024-04-04: Added 5 million mid-2011 posts from the k47 post dump. Browse (mostly) them here.
Update 2024-04-07: Added ~400 October 2003 posts from 4chan.net. Browse them here.

Welcome to Oldfriend Archive, the official 4chan archive of the NSA. Hosting ~170M text-only 2003-2014 4chan posts (mostly 2006-2008).
[203 / 24 / ?]

No.10207808 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
>Go to friends engagement party last night
>"I won't be drinking guys, I think I should stop because nothing good ever comes of it"
>They beg me all night to have a drink with them
>Get into it
>Before I know I'm the fucking DJ and I don't know what the fuck I'm doing on stage, holding the mic and screaming "ARE YOU FUCKING READY" over and over again
>Continiously keep slipping and falling down in front of everyone.
>Eventually puke on stage, everyone is freaking out screaming
>feeling the puke coming again, I press my lips tightly and eventually say " It's okay guys, I swallowed it."
>everyone is filming me and laughing
>Took my shirt off at some point because I thought I have muscles
>For some reason continue drinking
>friends begging me to stop, the fiancee of my friend is in tears
>"Please man, just go I'm begging you."
>"No man, tonight- WE'RE GETTING FUCKED UP."
>Eventually get thrown out
>Some random dude from the same party hits me up
>We go to a taco bell
>Start flipping tables and the guy is cussing out niggers
>We get a shitload of food in bags
>Lose it all at some point after we got a bottle of jack
>Hit on some random bitch, try to be "confident" she slaps me
>Continue puking my shit out