Christ walked around the attic bemused. He opened a cardboard box and looked inside. 'Baseball cards', he said, 'let's see if there are any good ones'. After flicking through them, and hoping to find a golden Joe Dimaggio, he tossed them back in the box. 'Nothing good in this stupid attic' he muttered.
But then something caught Christ's attention. In the far left hand corner of the room He spotted a table, on which something stood under a dirty grey rag. 'What the...?' Christ thought to himself, and slowly approached the blanketed object with a raised eyebrow in interest.
He stood in front of it and whipped off the cover. The Christ's eyes were flung open with surprise. Under the dirty sheet he had found some alien-looking, bright metallic machine, with a chrome shell and flashing lights. There was a long shaft coming out of it, something that looked like a high-tech gun or a laser beam. 'You gotta be kiddin' me' Christ murmered. He stared at it in awe for a few more moments, and then began pressing its green, yellow and red buttons to see what it could do. The machine sat in silence. 'Come ooon you stoopid machine, work!' He said in agitation. In a heat smashed his fist on the side of the machine, 'ahh yer good for nuthin', and walked away towards the attic door. As he reached for the doorhandle he heard a rattling behind him. He glanced confusedly in the direction of the machine. 'Huh', he muttered. The machine's rattling turned into a grinding sound, and the contraption started to vibrate and shake. Christ stood transfixed. All of a sudden a green laser blasted out from the shaft and hit Christ before he could dodge the fire. Then the machine stopped.