ITT : Hilarious sex stories

So I was just in the hilarious fap stories thread and it reminded me that sometimes I have sex (yes /b/ and you can too).

Little backstory : my room mate and I have been best friends since we were in our teens. Lived together on and off for years, just moved back in with him after a bad break up. Nothing is off limits as long as it's in the name of hilarity.

>Get really drunk
>Bring home neighbour girl
>Marathon drunk sex til like 7am because my dick won't fucking finish the job
>Forgot I left door open (my room is at the end of the hall) when I went to grab water
>Room mate walks by, I'm just giving her the nuts from behind facing out the door
>Dude locks eyes with me mid thrust, look of pure disgust and amusement
>Yells "MORTAL KOMBAT" at the top of his lungs
>I stop and am like "WTF?!"
>He yells "FINISH HER" and runs into the bathroom
>I pull out and start beating off, cum like a champ
>I yell back flawless victory

Never saw her again after that. This is just one of the many things that have happened living with this guy. Serious bro-tier dude.