Age 10: Happy enough when I'm with friends. Very hyper active and had to take Ritalin for it. No responsibilities. Mom obsessed with putting me in vests and hairbows and fixes my hair in a stupid looking way. Mom whoopes and hits me all the time because of her short temper. Hate her at this point, but feeling okay about other things.
Age 13: Mom stops whooping and hitting me finally by this age. I dress like crap, but can pick out my own clothes and do my own hair now. First start liking boys. Still pretty happy, but going through an identity crisis.
Age 16: Clinically depressed and hate everything about myself. Begin to wrist cut and had a failed suicide attempt trying to overdose on meds. Still dress like crap and not allowed to wear makeup. Trying to fit in with popular girls at school, but fail everytime. Boys completely ignore me, makes me feel even worse about my looks. Begin to keep to myself and stay in my room all the time. Despite all that, really enjoyed marching band, and decided to try hard at making good grades in school to raise my class rank. Very much still dislike my mom. Believed if I died she wouldn't care.
Current Self: Still gets depressed, but have a better handle on it now. Dress a lot better now and taking influence from styles in Japan and Korea, but still feel physically ugly a lot of the times. Still no boyfriend, and still getting ignored by most guys. Daydream a lot. Found lolita and finally feels pretty in something. Mom still gets on my last nerve, but I now love her though. Want to be more outgoing and let loose more. Student loans freaking me the hell out about my financial future and want to move out of this city. No longer changing my personality to fit in.