>>3385435Narcissism is the spawn of loneliness. The more I observe people, the more it pains me to see their pain.
OP, I wish you well and I hope you eventually fix things with your mother. She did the best she can, and she knows she will never fix the damages she's done... But she still needs your forgiveness.
You don't need to be there for her, but it will help you heal if you just let your hate for her go.