Update 2024-03-27: Greatly expanded the "Samples" page and renamed it to "Glossary".
Update 2024-04-04: Added 5 million mid-2011 posts from the k47 post dump. Browse (mostly) them here.
Update 2024-04-07: Added ~400 October 2003 posts from 4chan.net. Browse them here.

Welcome to Oldfriend Archive, the official 4chan archive of the NSA. Hosting ~170M text-only 2003-2014 4chan posts (mostly 2006-2008).
[32 / 2 / ?]

And thats how the squat was created

No.7743129 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
As I slipped through different planes of the multiverse, i recall a distant memory of my old self. One that lead to the creation of what I am now. It said I could be anything I wanted, so I took its place.

I sit, am I ? staring in the distant infinite space, neutrinos aimlessly crossing my sight, celestial events of this magnitude do not have any purpose to me anymore. I look down to this planet that was once my home. I reach down, did I ? to grasp grey dust, that slowly slips through my fingers. If only they knew what it really was, what every planet and moon was in fact made of.

I am 22 years old, I had a bike accident, doctors just took some radio of my injured knee. the muttering is inaudible. Suddenly one turns towards me and says with a dramatic expression "You will never squat deep enough again"

Silent, tears start falling down. I know exactly what they mean by this, I know exactly that my life right now is worth nothing. I don't want to die, I simply wish to erase my own existence. the shame that invades me in front of my parents is unbearable, looking at them is impossible, i hear my father saying that he is disapoint of me, and my mother, who was always by my side, buying me the latest GNC product and Men's Health, says in a disgusted tone, that i am not her son anymore, but only a weakfag.