Anyone watching this? Bosnia-Herzegovina should have walked away with the prize this year, thanks to a rioutously unfashionble Abba-sounding number with not one, not two, but THREE superb key changes. Norway also deserve an honourable mention for bringing actual glam-rock to eurovision.

Still, I can't begrudge Greece their victory too much. It was a pretty ace song, and Hellena Whatserface has a magnificent pair of tits.