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>growing up
>short, underweight, amuscular, look 3-4 years younger than i am
>live in antisocial asian neighborhood
>never do anything
>only contact with girl was when i was 5 and made out constantly with babysitter's daughter who was like 6
>high school
>have acquaintances but no friends
>no friends all 4 years
>when i join a new group because of sports, job, club, etc, people seem to like me a bit
>only party i went to was a grad party for a kind of weird kid, no alcohol or anything
>dont drink, smoke, ever done anything fun
>get to college
>expect things to be fun. dorm life, meet a lot of new people, hang out in rooms, maybe start going to parties, not much though because im introverted
>get put in so-called "antisocial dorm" where everyone just hangs out with roommates
>say fuck that, leave door open every day
>no one comes by
>fine, ill go look for other open doors
>none
>live with RA, doesnt let me do anything
>my roommate doesnt come to room, other roommates i know a bit but have their own crews
>meet barely anyone in dorm
>get discouraged
>become shut-in
>eat alone
>spend all time not in class in room
>hard to meet people in large 500 person lectures
>meet some people in lab, doesnt turn into anything like always
>4 months into year
>still kissless virgin, never gone to a party, shut-in
>hear people outside on fri/sat night all drunk and shit
>going to have to get an apartment alone
>contemplating suicide so my parents dont have to pay for college anymore for a life failure
