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Back in the 4th grade...>In art class, project of the day is finger painting a flag >Discussion ensues over what eachother should paint >Someone thinks aloud he should paint a good luck symbol on a flag >I blurt out he should paint a swastika as it is a good luck charm in a lot of cultures/religions. (Yes, I was an introverted kid back then too :( feels bad man) >Mexican hybrid or w/e the fuck he is blurts out that my comment was racist (antisemitism, we're in 4th grade) >He goes and tells the fat fuck of the art teacher >Art teacher sends me to principle for 'racist comments' >I argue with principle that the swastika had a long history before the Germans. >Principle doesn't know what the fuck I'm talking about, believes I'm making it up. >Calls my parents and I get a 2 day suspension >Every day, when I had to take a shit, I would shit in the urinal, or if it was just a piss, I'd clog up the sink with towels and piss in the sink. >After about a week, intercom states that whoever is doing the bathroom vandalism to please stop >Continue my scheme >Three days later, they announce that every child leaving a classroom would have to be accompanied by an adult >When a kid had to go to the bathroom, the teacher had to intercom for someone to come up >This led to less class time, a lot of accidents, and the parents shitstorm
Anonymous
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>Eat a banana >Try to throw peel in trashcan >Miss horribly >Dick bully walks by, slips on the peel
Anonymous
ok, yes. good. but seriously, the swastika wasn't a good luck sign, it was the symbol for good luck reversed and turned to the side. ut still, epic bathroom job. props for that robot.
Anonymous
>highschool >sitting next to a girl i hate >bullies me into giving her my chicken sandwich >girl throws it at the teacher we both hate >mfw
Anonymous
>>12324710 Yeah, I know that now, but I was in the 4th grade. I was partially right.
Still it has more religious connotations to it than killing Jews/symbol of hate.
Anonymous
No more? Fine, I'll keep spewing.>Girl comes up to me with those plastic sandwich bags inflated. >Asks me to pop it using her pencil >I oblige, she moves the bag at the last second and I hit the tip of her finger >She bleeds about a drop, cries to the teacher >PRINCIPLE TIME >I get on my report that I am aggressive, and tend to act out violently.
g0ref0ck
>Elementary School - HS >rarely talk to anyone >forget everything
Anonymous
>>12324894 >Some faggot that used to hang out with us because he had no other friends >Army is at our high school recruiting kids >I grab one of the slips that you fill out to receive more information >Fill it out with that faggots info >Keep a copy of it and give the other copy to the recruiter >Go to the kid and convince him it is paperwork to enlist in the army >Little faggot starts crying in the middle of class >Principle time >Tell the principle everything >Principles laughs and everytime I see him after that he asks me if I've signed anyone up recently and tells me that he already did his time so I shouldnt sign him up >mfw Anonymous
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>>12324918 Forever alone... /brofist
Anonymous
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>high school orchestra class >second chair, first stand, first violin >kid at the very back of the viola section is a fat rude irritating slob, but sometimes he's quiet so whatever >one day everyone else blames him for something he didn't do >to my disbelief the teacher gets in on it too >i stand up for him because fuck, if he isn't actually doing anything for once, shouldn't we encourage that? >teacher gets belligerent with me >i stand up and walk the fuck out >walk off campus to a park >play my violin there instead >get a few bucks tossed to me by passers-by >mfw
Anonymous
>>12324936 Nice one, I did something similar
>In HS spanish class >Those humanitarian people came by for the abroad semester for the South American thing >They hand out forms to the people and ask where you'd like to go and the likes >Asshole behind me that always puts gum in my seat passes it forward to me. >I change the countries he wants to go to from Belize, Costa Rica, Mexico to Venezuela, Bolivia, Haiti and Honduras. The worst countries there. >mfw Anonymous
>>12325179 I used to draw swastikas on peoples papers as they handed them up to the front of the class. I practiced for a few days before I did it so that I could draw the entire thing in two strokes.
>mfw Mr. Eckstein sent the kid behind me to the principles office Anonymous
>high school >photography teacher is nasty to me >she rips up my work and calls in crap >wears slutty clothes to school >puts gluesticks in her cleavage >I casually mention to the Principal about my issues with her >She dosn't try anything with me anymore, not my teacher the next year
Anonymous
High school obviously:>Sitting in class minding my own >teachers up in my face like: "anon what is on that sheet of paper" >"nothing miss" >shoots some glares >eat a pear
Anonymous
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so i went to a school for kids with ADD and ADHD.>kid wants to make caramels >not allowed to >goes berserk >trashes his own private tutoring room (private because he couldn't be with anyone else) >stays at the school.
Anonymous
>be in sixth grade >join band >I'm told I can't play percussion like I wanted to >I must play "accesories" >fucking tambourines and shit >fuck that >never do anything worthwhile during band time >once, crawled into cupboard >two boys (both of whom are actually pretty chill now) close the door on me >I'm not really scared, but I yell and scream for help anyway >hear music stop >cupboard doors open >band teacher glaring at me with the eyes of death >get kicked out for interrupting the music >mfw
Anonymous
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>>12324782 Yeah, but it's reputation has been forever tarnished I think, people like to jump to conclusions about things like this.
Anonymous
>watching movie in class, elementary school >get placed up front on the floor so people behind me can see >bored as fuck >lean on my hand >sigh >the sigh causes incredibly realistic fart sounds to erupt from my hand >everyone thinks I farted >god dammit >laughter, laughter everywhere
Anonymous
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>>12324630 >>12324710 a swastika reversed and turned to the left is not a swastika
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sauwastika http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swastika the swastika represented the german mission, or so i have been told
Anonymous
>>12325306 I've got a similar story.
>Half asleep in pre-calc class >Someone lets out the worst smelling fart I've ever smelled >Gag on the smell >Start to laugh because a fart woke me up >Everyone turns around and blames me because I was laughing >mfw the class has to leave the room because the smell was so bad Anonymous
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>>12325230 ME TOO
>Sitting in class minding my own >Friend wants to be shown >Say sure why not >Smoke some pot >shoot some glares >eat a pear Anonymous
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>in fourth grade >have blocked nose >try to breathe but it makes a bubbling sound and I stop >teacher hears the noise and blames the class "clown" >everything went better than expected dot jpeg >hanging with best bud in playground >younger kid wants to play with us >we swing him by his hands and feet really high onto the grass >he loves it, keeps requesting moar >friend accidently slips and kid falls and slams his head off rocks >kid screams >friend runs >i panic and run too >hang with friends the entire break >kid tells principal >kid and principal come to class to find purpertrators >mfw he picked 3 random guys and convinced everyone it was them
Anonymous
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Middle School or whatever you call it I was 14 8th grade>two parallel football (soccer) fields one large one smaller >15 yr old kids playing in the large one (9th grade) and 14 yr old betas playing in the small one (8th grade and my friends) >sitting at the side and watching my friends play >everytime our ball goes to their field they grab it and shoot it outside the campus into the street >I was beta aswell but tall and bulky (by 8th grade standards) and everytime they did it my rage grew >by the fifth time, I waited for their ball to cross our field then grabbed it and shot it to the street >two of them come up to me "wtf was that for" etc me: "what are you going to do?" >then a blackbelt karate friend of mine backs me up and trashtalks he was also athletic, but kinda beta he wasn't aggressive never used is skills to intimidate or bully >so first time I see him act aggressive, those 9th graders had no idea what was coming to them >but they pussy out and we watch those faggots go outside to the street to get their ball >brofists, brofists everywhere
Anonymous
>high school, sophomore year >arrive early to school >decide I'll head to my first hour early and hang out with the teacher/catch up on some work >walking down the hall way, feel weird.. >feel something coming out of my nose.. >place my hand towards my face >suddenly blood >don't freak out, casually place my hand over my nose and walk to class >TEACHER IS NOT THERE >what was a little drip and drop of blood now becomes A FUCKING GUSHER OF STREAMING BLOOD SPEWING OUT OF ME WHAT THE FUCK >Kid sees this >FREAKS THE FUCK OUT >gets another teacher >FREAKS THE FUCK OUT >rushes me to the bathroom >shoves paper towel in my face >escorts me to the nurses office >sit down >sit there for over an hour, blood will not stop coming out of my nose >they call ambulance >ambulance arrive >have lost a shit ton of blood by now, feeling very weak >end up passing out >wake up later that day in the hospital >week off >return, every one thought I was dead.
Anonymous
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ITT: PRINCIPLE TIME
Anonymous
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>freshman English >teacher hates me >failing class by about 2% >she hands out extra credit >work on it with friend >friend fucks with me by ripping the paper in half >ask teacher for new one >"why do you need a new one?" > mins ripped... >"why should I give you it if youll just rip it again" > friend ripped it, not me... > "OHHHH SO EVERYTHINGS HIS FAULT" > fine I'll just tape it. > remember me and said friend stole her tape like 3 weeks ago > lol a little > staple that shit like frankenstein
Anonymous
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>junior in highschool >teacher paranoid of cellphonea >class is quiet >make vibrating noise to fuck with teacher >teacher looks at kid on the other side of the room >"give me your phone" >"I don't have one" >"bring it here NOW" >"i really don have one" >searches kids pockets, nothing >searches back pack, finds graphing calculator. >close enough >kid goes to principles for "lying and being disrespectful" >I lol my ass off.
Anonymous
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Senior in Junior High School...>In math class one day we're doing busy work. >My hair is long as fuck. >It's been growing for two years with no problems. >Some kid decides to pull my hair when the teacher isn't looking. >I tell him to stop. >The tugs get progressively harder. >I repeatedly tell him to stop. >He tugs for a third time. >I get up, turn around, and punch him square in the teeth. >Teacher saw. >Teacher quiets class down.
Anonymous
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>>12325520 Knock that shit off, Candle Jack, we're trying to have a discussio-
Anonymous
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>>12325319 This made me laugh aloud. Amazing, it's 6:00 AM.
Cheers.
Anonymous
>Be on the 5th grade basketball team for my school >Final game of the season >4th inning >Team mate passes the ball to me >Something happens and apparently I get two foul shots >Shoot the first one and miss >Shoot the second and score >Crowd goes wild >My team goes on to win the game >Later on, everyone celebrates and I get a special mention for my only successful shot of the season >Realize that it was the only shot I made throughout the two seasons I was active >Never join another organized sport or activity group throughout my entire primary and secondary education years
Anonymous
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Currently...>Senior in High School >Shit's cash. Honors classes, teachers are nice. >Homework is very little. >Miss 14 days of school quarter one >Miss them due to anxiety. >I won't even believe myself. >Chem teacher allows me to take my time making up work >He's a bro. >Swap out of class. >Feel guilty. >Want to do work. >Feels like I'll never get around to it. >Feels like I'll get away with it. >Feels like I shouldn't care, I'm a senior. >Feelsbadman.
Anonymous
>>12325653 >mfw 4th inning >inning Anonymous
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>last year, senior >the end of two years of constantly blowing off highschool work for college >get reminded on highschool credits and senior project all year >fuck that >continue with college >get all credits within the last two weeks >project/presentation at the last minute >perfect score >feelsgoodman.jpg
Anonymous
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>>12325688 As you can see, I am quite detached from popular recreational sports and the workings and mechanics thereof. If you happen to know what those basketball intervals are called, then please enlighten me.
Anonymous
>Be in Grade 1 >Be a pimp, doing my colouring and shit >Some kid next to me asks if he can go to the bathroom >5 minutes to lunch time, teacher tells him to wait >4 minutes 30 seconds later the kid starts crying >He shitted himself >No kidding, leaking through his pants >It's all over the floor >He gets called poo poo pants for the rest of primary school into 9th grade.
Anonymous
>>12325775 This almost happened to me but it was more of a case of me sitting there for over half an hour like a beta sack of babby crap waiting for the fucking spanish teacher to let me go to the fucking bathroom. Brown marks on underwear when I finally made it to the bathroom (I think I eventually just up and walked out) and furiously tried to clean it with toilet paper.
Fortunately, I was no poopoo pants. I was just some nerd.
Anonymous
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not me but this shit happened while i was there:>kid walks into friends class wearing a wig >kid was told his friends teacher was awsome >teacher is actually insane >kid makes finger gun >teacher freaks out >school goes into lockdown >"possible shooter on campus" >police show up >"possible hostage situation" >me and my friends thought shit was getting real >2 hours before the situation was cleared up >I lol'd
Anonymous
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>>12324715 it is impossible to know if you still hated her or if you began to like her since you neglected to include a face even though you stupidly said
>mfw Anonymous
>Middleschool >Live in Texas >Be a good kid that all the teacher's adored >Lunchtime >Holy hell it's snowing outside! >Recess is canceled due to snow >Hear some kids talk about running outside to go play in the snow >Go along >Play for 15 minutes in the snow >My history teacher comes outside and catches us >Tells me how disappointed she is in me
Anonymous
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>>12325800 That's lucky man.
That kid didn't come to school for a week hoping we forgot.
We didn't.
Anonymous
>>12325845 >Anon I'm disappointed in you for enjoying life and trying to make friends. >And shame on you other kids. Trying to make Anon feel accepted. You know he's a weirdo. Anonymous
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>>12325862 Pretty much, I think it went something like
"All of you get inside now, and Anon I thought you knew better."
Anonymous
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>In middle school (8th grade) >Be an office aide >Awesome job get to run around school for a period >Someone starts putting shit on top of the stalls in the bathroom >Office aides are now required to sit in front of the restrooms all day managing sign in sheets >What was once an awesome excuse to not have class is now boring and useless >mfw when people would still leave shit in various spots in the bathroom including the air vents.
Anonymous
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>>12325220 it took you two days to learn how to draw a swastika in two strokes?
...faggot.
Anonymous
I got a good story to share.>probably middle school, Im not sure >sex ed >decide to play a prank on a girl >stick elmers glue in my pants >open fly >pull the tip out >NNGGHHOHGAWD >press >white stuff flies at her and hits her pencil case >silence >more silence >boys burst out in laughter >girls utter cries of disgust >teacher is going apeshit trying to find out what happened while calming down the boys >what the fuck did I just do? This was so unlike me and hell, i must have not been thinking straight at all >try to save face >declare "ITS ELMERS GLUE!!!" >suspended
Anonymous
Anonymous
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>>12325222 >>slutty teacher moar please
Anonymous
Not particularly old, but still funny>11th grade >English teacher is strong feminist (not castration militant, but she got dumped by her husband and raised 3 kids alone, so she wasn't fond of men, also thought women were definitely superior) >Watching 'The Great Gatsby', we just finished reading it >She comments throughout the movie about the oppression of women >Get up to the scene where Tom punches Myrtle >SMACK >I burst out laughing >Death stares from teacher and disapproving looks from girls, other guys start laughing with me >mfw I'm still one of her favorite students because I'm that awesome
Anonymous
>>12326241 >Opression of Women After reading the book, I thought you could sum up every woman in the book with the word "BITCH."
But that's just me
Anonymous
>>12326260 I would have to agree. Feminists do not approve of such logic, though.
You should have heard her throughout 'The Scarlet Letter'. Ugh.
Anonymous
>>12326260 >>12326265 >>12326241 I never read a single book all of High School.
Are you guys even serious?
Anonymous
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>>12326364 About what? Reading? Of course I read books in high school.
Anonymous
>>12325264 A similar thing happened to me, only in art class. I married one of the assholes who trapped me.
Anonymous
Anonymous
>In Spanish class >get given worksheet where we have to translate what each person is saying >Has picture of a latina bitch >Write "you couldn't afford it honey" in the speech box >Have to swap sheet and read it out >Carmen gets my worksheet
Anonymous
>>12326490 I don't know who Carmen is.
Anonymous
>>12326538 Shes the mexican girl.
I would have thought you'd have picked up on that.
Oh, and if you are too stupid to realise what happened, she read it out in her accent, realised what she said and got me in trouble.
Anonymous
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>>12326490 laughed my fucking ass off
thanks for that anon
Anonymous
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>ctrl+f >no penis inspection day >mfw
Anonymous
>>12326561 Wow, Im not the guy who asked the question, but you seem like a total douche to me.
Carmen isnt a name that only latin americans use so the question was justified.
You are just a huge jackass who thinks everyone should know about your oh so important life.
Go fuck a tree.
Anonymous
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>>12326783 innocent lurker here asking you to please stfu. his story was actually one of the best ones in this thread.
Anonymous
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>>12326783 You are righ about him being a douche... but on the other hand I'm from eastern Europe and I figured that Carmen was a latino or some shit.
More stories please!
Anonymous
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It would be funnier if he added>In Spanish class >get given worksheet where we have to translate what each person is saying >Has picture of a latina bitch >Write "you couldn't afford it honey" in the speech box >Have to swap sheet and read it out >Carmen gets my worksheet >she reads it out in her mexican accent >realised what she said
Anonymous
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>be 12 >go with friend to the bathroom and put liquid soap on doorhandles and on toilet seats >this goes on for a few weeks until bored >later find out that some older girls that we hated started copying this >they get caught and take the blame >lol
Anonymous
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>Be in year 10/11 so about 16 >In physics lesson learning about electronics >Take crocodile clip wire and attach it to mate's ear >He starts flailing around and screaming >Another friend has to physically hold him down so he can take it off >mfw that's still one of the funniest stories me and my friends can think of
Anonymous
>be in grade 10 >expected to be mature by this point >lol as if >cunt of a teacher puts on Schindler's List for history >the scene where Jews get stripped naked for a "shower" >kid in the back yells "BOOBIES" >guys repeat this, girls burst out laughing >movie turned immediately off >teacher leaves room on the verge of tears >comes back in ten to yell at us >fuck yeah
Anonymous
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Bump reqcuired now.
Anonymous
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>>12327137 So much facepalm...
Anonymous
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>English class >Teacher is a moron who will believe me because I have a good credit rating. >Watching the movie Witness >Scene where Harrison Ford puts his hand on the back of the kids head and kisses him >Yell out "Tell anyone about our secret and I'll kill ya" >Teacher has a laugh >Hambeast asks what I said >Tell her >"YOU SICK FUCK!" >I Loled more. >Talking about Global Village. >Talking about the internet. >Say "Gotta be careful on the internet, you might get backtraced" >Teacher blindly agrees >niggayousrs?
Anonymous
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>Walking across school to do some shit as a class >Me and moleman start stomping on some bushes >start kicking the native fauna >teacher yells at us to come over >stupid teacher starts saying some shit about something >moleman replies "whaddya mean?" >teacher replies "what do you mean 'whaddya mean?'" >moleman replies "whaddya mean whaddya mean whaddya mean?" >mfw i laughed until i cried >teacher gave us detentions but we ignored him and nothing happened
Anonymous
Meanwhile in Germany..>friend and me in math >get worksheet >we paint swastikas on the finger-tip >press the fingers on the worksheet >think we're funny as hell >teacher "Shit who has the worksheet for the 5th grade?" >lucky as we have was it our worksheet >we"OH FUCK" try as quickly as possible to make it unrecognizable >he takes it, look at this, look at us >have to go to the teacheroffice >there 3 teacher yell at us, what we think we're doing >my friend is laughing as hell >teacher yell"shall i copy this for the 5th kids with a swastika on it?" >we say nothing >go out and laughing so hard
Anonymous
>Computer Class >Boring as shit >Taught by principle. >Dont pay attention and still get 100% >Read a book while principle is lecturing about some internet bullshit. >principle gets angry at me not paying attention. >CHALK THROW >Catch the chalk throw. >Put chalk in pocket. >Class gasps (i was the nerdy kid with no athletic skills) >Continue reading >Get sent to the office for "acting smart."
Anonymous
>>12327490 Jesus Christ, are you still in 5th grade or something?
lrn2english
Anonymous
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>>12327846 >Implying English isn't his second language >Implying he didn't make it obvious he's German Anonymous
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>middle school P.E >someone puts graffiti all over campus >P.E teacher tells me that graffiti is shit and comes from assholes >mfw
Anonymous
Op here, contribootin>In 8th, top of the school 6 grade - 8th grade school >I'm stuck in this remedial class for 'students with a hard time learning' (I'm very unenthusiastic about school) >This is back when those paper wasps with the rubber bands are the craze >Me and a good bro ask to leave to go to the bathroom >We wander around, flinging wasps at eachother and other people >Outside of workshop class, find a metal 'hinge' like object >Awesome idea: use it as a wasp >I take one in the arm from my friend, breaks the skin and the pain is enormous >See this faggot ass kid that rats on everyone >We aim for his back >He unexpectedly turns to open the door, the metal wasp curves up and hits him in the throat >Teacher comes rushing out asking what happened >We say we don't know, teacher thinks we punched him >PRINCIPLE TIME!!!!! >Principle loves my parents, doesn't believe the teacher, and thinks the kid faked it to get us in trouble >Kid gets next day lunch detention and after school detention >mfw
Anonymous
>>12327621 >principle >principle >principle learn how to spell faggot
Anonymous
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>middle school >water break (we all go to the drinking fountain and machines and such) >stay in a single file line >heading back to class, i take the front of the line >walking >realize there's noone behind me >look down the hall and everyone's filing into the classroom >i went too far >everybody laughs and points at me >walk of shame back to class >never walk in the front of a group ever again
Anonymous
>in 7th grade teacher doing some dumb team building exercise >one person is blindfolded while another one leads the blindfolded person around >get incredible bitchy girl >she bitches and whores the whole time (aww this is gay, you are all gay for doing this, ect.) >i tell girl just be quiet and lets get this done so we can go back inside >she gets mad and then leads me into a huge mudpuddle ruining my shoes >think alright bitch you want to play dirty we can play dirty >shes sceptical at first but i lead her around perfectly so i gain her trust >right at the end while walking with the group >find a lightpole >walk bitch straight into lightpole >most awful ear shattering skull into lightpole clang >bitch starts crying i act very apologetic and remourseful >inside im loling with the power of 5000 boners instantly forever
Anonymous
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>>12327930 Ya, gets annoying, but its nothing to fret about dudezor.
You got OCD fellow robot?
Anonymous
Ausfag here>12 years old, year 6. youngest in the year. >Four 11-year olds in year 5 (my brother's year) been giving me shit since about year 3, since they're the same size as me (I didn't grow much untill I was 16. I went from a 4 feet 11 inch 16 year old to a 6 foot tall 17 and a half year old, shit was wierd) >Finish eating lunch, me and friends going to go play brandings (basically tag but with a tennis ball) >Leave lunchbox at benches, go to get tennis ball >Walking towards playground where friends are, go past lunchbox >the four year 5 kids are literally smashing my lunchbox to pieces >I finally snap after doing nothing for 3 years >Run over to the leader of their group and punch him straight in the face and crash-tackle one of the others at the same time >While he's on the ground, lift my knee up behind me and slam it down as hard as I can into his nuts >get grabbed and put into a full-nelson by another >start getting punched in the stomach >stomp as hard as I can on the guy holding me >grab puncher's arm, kick him in the shin >twist his arm behind his back and pull up as hard as I could >guy who I stomped throws a relatively big rock at me which hits me straight in the eye >super mega ultra rage mode enabled >tackle him straight into the metal fence and throw him over it, sending him down about 2 metres
Anonymous
>>12327982 (cont)Total damage:
ME:
>Broken rib >Temporarily blinded in my eye, doctors feared permanent blindness >Caused damage to my collarbone after doing two extremely hard tackles in rapid succession >Various bruises Enemies:
>Leader had broken nose and was unconcious for 20 minutes >First tackled kid was in too much pain to move for about 10 minutes and walked funny for 2 days afterwards >Stomach-puncher had a very broken and dislocated arm >Full-nelsoner/rock thrower had a damaged spine from the crash into the metal fence and broke both legs after I threw him over it. He also had a stick go through his forearm when he landed on it (just the flesh, obviously not the bone) which became infected, leaving the only limb he could use properly for 2 months to be his non-writing arm. PUNISHMENTS:
>I got expelled >Leader got suspended for 1 week >Ball-victim got a detention >Arm-victim got a 3 day suspension >Rock-thrower got expelled for throwing a rock good times. Oh, wait, no they weren't. At least high school was decent.
Anonymous
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>>12328000 Bravo good sir
captcha: newport lite
TRYIN TO GET ME TO SMOKE CAPTCHA?!
Anonymous
Anonymous
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>>12327896 OP went to FLMS
Anonymous
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>>12328000 If what you write is the truth, then you sir are truly a man.
Never lose that fighting spirit.
Anonymous
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>>12328000 BADFUCKINASS.
That's all I have to say about that.
Anonymous
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>>12327982 >>12328000 So you got expelled over a lunchbox.
Cool story bro.
Anonymous
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This happened when I was in 8th grade>be loner with only one good friend >picked on a lot >On last day of Jr.High, get bullied by same people at school festival >Rage mode activated >kneed one in the nuts >slap another hard enough to make him stumble and cry >Teachers had known all throughout Jr.high i got bullied by the two pricks >Didn't get punished while two boys got reprimanded. >feelsgoodman.jpg
Anonymous
>Read first half of story >Imagines OP researched the subject with credible sources and presented it to his teachers, validating his claim and clearing his name in an academic fashion >shit in the urinal
Anonymous
>in high school >"Black Out" day; everybody's supposed to wear black to support the football team or some gay shit like that >friend and I wear white, trollface dot jay fucking peg >principal sees us, flips shit >drags us into the office, threatens suspension >begins filling out paperwork to get us suspended, friend and I are just laughing nonstop at the ridiculousness of it >he calls our respective mothers to alert them that we're being suspended >his face when both of our mothers start laughing their asses off whenever he tells them why their son is being suspended >after the second call, he doesn't even look us in the eye, just says "Go back to class" defeatedly >fuck that shit, we took the rest of the day off
Anonymous
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>>12324894 send your child to that school and always back him up
Anonymous
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>early elementary school, ain't too sure which grade >there's a fly, bug or some sort of insect on the table >everyone is quiet listening to the teacher >I grab the bug and eat it >this story follows me for ages
Anonymous
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>>12328289 I dont know why, but this made me lol hard. Thank you.
Anonymous
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>Kick the front doors of the school open >Some wooden thing on it breaks >Go instantly to the teachers lounge and confess >Get in no trouble, everyone understands it was an accident, commended for being honest. >Secretly involved in nightly breakin and stealing of money from offices.
Anonymous
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>>12328316 I remember the "black out" shit
A lot of the 'goths' at my school used that as an excuse to parade around in all black and chains.
Anonymous
>1st grade hanging out >attending a catholic school >kid starts talking some shit to me >"fuck you lets take this outside" >we're on the tennis court >I beat him 9-3 >he starts talking like a bitch >I take my racket and ruin his face >wham wham wham over and over >oh shit did i give him a concussion >he starts running away >I throw the bloody racket, it hits him in the small of the back, he goes down >I coolface and walk away >sued, kicked out of school >to this day, I have not managed to give a fuck
Anonymous
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> 3rd year > shit scared of new teacher > too scare dto ask to go take a piss > piss myself under the table > mfw no one noticed > year 11 > plasterboard walls > running in corridor trip over some bitches legs > go flying 2 metres > head goes straight through plaster board wall > never hear about it from anyone > fuckyeah.png
Anonymous
>>12328316 > be in Hitler Youth > April 20th 1939, everybody's supposed to wear their HJ uniforms in support of the Fuehrer's birthday > friend and I turn up in, respectively, a Red Army uniform and a Shirt with Lenin on it > both wearing yellow stars on our clothing > group leader flips shit when he sees us > starts threatening to get us hanged, starts dialing to call the police > we're laughing uncontrollably at the ridiculousness of it all > he calls our mothers, they laugh uncontrollably everytime he says "Volksverrat" and "Bolschewismus" > gives up, hangs his head in shame, tells us to get back to the march > fuck that, we write "Hitler lutscht Schwaenze" on his door instead > high fives everywhere Anonymous
>>12328462 >fuck you lets take it outside > MFW you guys just go play tennis Anonymous
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>>12328509 we kick it old school
and by "old" i mean "private"
Anonymous
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>>12324630 So the head of the school gets after you, and you take it out on the janitor?
Anonymous
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>>12325471 son... I know what happened to you. You were thinking dirty thoughts about your teacher and got a nosebleed. this is a common side effect of arousal in japanese and anime males.
You're really lucky to be alive.
Anonymous
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>>12328289 That's fucking hilarious. I lol'd.
Anonymous
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>5th grade >Get sent to sit out in the hall because I'm being disruptive >All classroom doors have this tall, thin window in them >Go out in the hall, hallway is empty >Get bored as fuck >Jump inside a garbage can (it had just been emptied, so it was clean) >Repeatedly bounce by the window, ala Mario in Kuribo's Shoe >Class sees me bouncing around inside a garbage can through the little window >Everyone, even the teacher, is laughing >Don't get in any trouble at all >Fuck year
Anonymous
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>In 3rd grade >Eating lunch in the lunchroom >Friend gets up to throw apple core away >Rather than just place it into garbage can, he throws it from 10 or so feet away >Apple core clips the edge of the garbage can >A small piece flies back and hits my friend square in the face >He's so surprised he falls flat on his ass >Somehow I'm the only person in the entire lunchroom who saw what happened
Anonymous
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>year 10, maths class, sat at the back in the middle >teacher is writing on board, back to us >friend grabs pen out of my hand and throws it accross the class, infront of 2 other students and out the window >teacher turns round >poker faces >writes something else on board >his pens gone too >pokerfaces all round >he replies with my pencil case >his pencil case >my book >his book >continue until nothing left >look at each other, no more shit to throw >friend taps guy in fronts shoulder, I grab his shit and throw it out the window >he gets grumpy >teacher approaches >'why aren't you doing anything?' >'we don't have our equipment sir' >'well where is it then?' >point out window, lawn literally covered with pens, pencils, books, bottles of water etc
Anonymous
Anonymous
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>>12324710 both directions were meant as good luck sign meaning the wind of the sun or such
story time
Higher technical School
>English Teacher, Female, disgusting old hag, we had an additional english lesseon (i dunno why I had to attend each exam with 1 or 2) >talking about female clothing >important she always was sitting spread legged >she made one of our tukish class mates sit right infront of her >teach desk was on a podium, so that he always had her twat in his view >forces himself to look to the front without looking straight forward, he barely dare breathing >summer days >she wants to explain what a hem is >spreads her legs pulls her skirt up and shouts "THIS IS A HEM" point at the hem of her skirt >The turkish guy, goes pale white starts screaming and topples backwards screaming like he saw the devil himself (or what the islamic equivalent is) >she didnt wear any underpants, spread beaver >I was happy enough just to sea it from the corner of my eye, but I almost puked Shit was not so fresh
Same retarded teacher wanted to make me fail english class: my exam results 1,2,4,1(i think A+ B D A+) we went to the principal and she was like "I was not impressed with his attention in class, look how many attention minus point he got"( In one day 58, she never wrote why, neither did she remeber why) Principal, you dont write down why he got those bad marks, you dont remember why and ... are you out of your mind? 58 in 50 minutes? Anons mark will be B- in worst case!
Next year she wasnt teacher at this school anymore
feelsgoodman.jpg
Anonymous
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>>12329047 >the who throws shit at ehr and makes her cry >you went to school with the who Anonymous
>Junior year in High School. >In German class. >Teacher is spineless, cries in front of class several times per month. >Plans a trip to our local Holocaust Museum. >Tells our class a week before the trip. >Slutty cheerleader says "I should starve myself for a week to prepare for the fieldtrip." >not_sure_if_serious.jpg
Anonymous
>>12329267 That is surprisingly funny having come from a woman, that is.
Anonymous
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>be in 7th grade >during a test >mate of mine coughs >say "god bless you" >friend says during the middle of a test "you don't say god bless you for a cough" >tell him i do w/e the fuck i want >get into argument >teacher calls us over >get in trouble >laugh about it after class
Anonymous
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>>12329302 She was completely straight faced though. She's normally stupid as shit which is why it caught me off guard. No one else in the room even thought twice about her comment.
Anonymous
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>high school >art class >friend i'm stuck sitting next to has started to become a complete dick over the past few months >for some reason our table is talking about child abuse >i make a comment that i cant even remember, my friend knows exactly what i meant, but to be a prick says "omg anon why would you beat kids thats so fucked up" >"you know thats not what i me-" >"sir! sir! anon told me he beats younger children" >principle >mfw he gets emotional when i say he's been a prick
Anonymous
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What an amusing thread
Anonymous
>arrogant grammar nazi dick head in my IT class >his name is Cole. >me and friend print off a list of words with cole in them >"i want to go to coles and get some coleslaw" >teacher rage mode 5 "ANON GET UP HERE NOW" >you sound upset sir, do you have a COLEsore causing you pain? *coolface* >ANON SHUT YOUR MOUTH AND GET OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW >sir, i didn't expect you to give me the COLE shoulder like this. >entire class erupts with laughter after catching on. >suspended >come back to school, hailed as a hero
Anonymous
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>be senior in high school (2009) >hang out in library with bros err'day, generally sit at a table near front entrance >earlier that day, mentally ill kid gets escorted off campus by police >find out he had hit list in his bag. girl in his class accidentally found it when she flipped her pen into his backpack and reached for it >mfw I would have been shot in my schools library
Anonymous
>history class >teacher has made a chart of those who are achieving their target grades >target grades range from a* to c (lolbritfag) >personal target grade is an F (yes TARGET) >chart has my name highlighted to show that I have improved on my target grade >grade has risen from F to E >teacher congratulates me >class laughs >return to being the person at the back that no one talks to >mfw
Anonymous
>primary school, about 5 or 6 years old >PE class! fuck yeah, dicking about on the A frame >some kid is the first to go down slide >shits himself just as he goes >shit all up his back, all the way down the slide >never use A frame again
Anonymous
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>french class >everyone busy on assignment >two smoking hot girls >they stand up >one wraps her legs around the other >nobody else watching >cannot believe what I'm seeing
Anonymous
>>12329438 What is an A Frame? I'm from murrica.
Anonymous
>>12329503 It was this frame that folded out from the wall, it formed an A when it was fully out. It had all sorts of stuff. Ropes, rope ladders, regular ladders, a slide, climbing rings and so on.
Anonymous
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>>12329547 Thanks, I thought maybe you were using slang, but nope.
Anonymous
>>12329431 Shouldn't you be constantly updating your Farm in Farmville?
Anonymous
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>>12329581 the fucks farmville?
doesn't mean I don't have historical knowledge, I just hated that class so I didn't do any work
Anonymous
>In Grade 7. >Douchebag Grade 9 kid every lunch day would walk up to me and say "Hey Anon, I'm thirsty." and take my Coke and drink half of it. >Get older brother to buy me some ipecac. >Put ipecac in Coke bottle. >Douchebag takes Coke and drinks half of it. >Get friends of mine to follow him around. >Around 10 minutes later he's at his locker. >He opens it up. >And just starts puking. >Puking all over his locker, some got on his friends. >And he doesn't stop for a solid 3 minutes. >mfw he gets the nickname "Pukey" and doesn't drink from my Coke again.
Anonymous
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>>12329623 Very nice.
I wish the bullies at my highschool had been stupid enough to take things from me that I could poison.
Anonymous
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>Come back to secondary school after going out for lunch. >Math teacher casually, almost jokingly says "theres a bomb in the school" >What? >"Theres a bomb in the school. Somebody threatened the school with an anonymous phone-call and we are waiting waiting for the bomb disposal squad" >look around; true enough, there's police and firemen walking around looking important, and the deputy head has a facial expression that suggests this is the defining moment in her career >Math teacher guides us to an escort to the old off-campus school, seems amused by the whole thing >so are we, its oblviously bullshit >about 500-700 people are packed into the old hall. Why? I don't even >Girls crying and panicking >Being the cynical person I am, I jokingly say putting everyone in this hall is more dangerous, and with a bit of foresight anybody would put the bomb here for maximum casualties >Girl overhears me, panics into mass of tears and stressed breathing and is taken away >place is a shuddering mess, with a few groups laughing - who eventually get a game of poker going >get sent home after about an hour >that was a good day
Anonymous
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>10th grade >Religion Class (Catholic school fail) >Have to piss during lecture >Wait until lecture is finished, now doing worksheets on our own >Ask teacher to use washroom >"No." >"Umm, that was a formality I'm 15 years old I don't need your permission." >Washroom >Return, class door is locked. Vice Principle approaches, says teacher called him down because of me. >Explain situation. >VP reprimands cunt teacher in front of class. >mon visage quand >11th grade, IT class >Teacher leaves room for something >Asian kid, complete asshole, nobody likes, calls the big, slightly retarded black kid a nigger to his face. >Black kid levels Asian kid >Teacher returns, Asian kid tries to rat out black kid >Teacher asks class what happened. >With zero planning, whole class tells the teacher the Asian kid tripped and smashed his face on the desk, black kid is innocent, Asian kid is just racist >Asian kid sent to office >brofists, brofists everywhere.
Anonymous
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>>12325471 what was it you had then? Brain aneurysm?
Anonymous
>>12324630 You're a fucking moron.
/A chunk of my family was killed in the Holocaust
Anonymous
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>in 8th grade >biology teacher decides that for some reason we should watch a movie about abortions >movie starts >everybody are half watching,terrified,disgusted >suddenly,in the shallow silence I hear a muffled chuckle >turn my head >my classmate is holding an open book,and,I think L.Tolstoy has a dick for a nose on a portrait >hero poker face >he starts laughing >laugh like a thousand german soldiers raped with candlesticks >everybody stares at me like I'm a freak and find the movie funny >It makes me even more amused >can't stop laughing >get thrown out of the class with that dude >laugh loudly behind the door for a couple of minutes >mfw when trollface all the time while in biology class
Anonymous
>Sitting in maths class, teacher is blahing on >Says we're not paying attention, got to stay five minutes late (lunch break was after the lesson >Local bully says to me, "lets jump out the window five minutes early and leave (it was a ground floor) >I agree, despite being an unsocial nerd >time comes, I jump out the window, other kid doesn't >straight up don't give a fuck, keep walking off >mfw I didn't get in trouble at all
Anonymous
>feeling sick >very sick >ask teacher to go to bathroom >no >wait a while >oh god very sick >ask again >still no >get up and go anyways >teacher tells me to sit back down >grab teacher by shirt so he can't get away >stomach voids contents >teacher absolutely covered in chunky vomit (was after lunch) >freaks out and falls to the ground >can I go to the bathroom now? >he's too freaked to respond >very sick, but trollface all the way home
Anonymous
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Good thread, MOAR!
Anonymous
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>>12329940 I think I love you.
>synnia absence Anonymous
>a girl who hung out with all of the chavs/bullies/assholes would always harass me in front of everyone >it's summer,and I'm playing basketball without a shirt because it's very hot >she gets behind me and with all her fat might slaps me on the back >fucking pain,red hand stain for a few days >happens again a few times >me,a couple of the bullies and the bitch are sitting in the shade,after a fast paced game,resting >suddenly she hits me again >rage of a thousand suns >take of my boot and hit her in the face several times until she isn't even crying,just laying still >everybody are silent >no one picked on me ever again. EVER.
Anonymous
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>Show and tell >I pick my nose, and flick it towards the teacher >Teacher blames the kid that can barely understand english >mfw
Anonymous
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>At 14, sent to Jesuit school >Theology class >Teacher asks for arguments against existence of God >Hands are raised >Without thinking I jump up on my chair and scream 'Strike me down God!' >Lightning fails to appear, I say 'See!' and sit down, kinda surprised at myself (Good Boy That I Was) >Classmates piss themselves laughing >Teacher fails to regain control, can't keep a straight face either >Class dismissed >Social acceptance!
Anonymous
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>>12329417 Sif no Cole Train bra.
Anonymous
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>>12329623 >>12329940 The ipecac and vomiting in the classroom reminds me of a thing we did.
I gave my friend a bottle of ipecac and said that if he drank it, he'd get 10 bucks.
He did.
Gave him the 10 bucks.
In the middle of Social Studies, he stands up...
Goes to the teacher's desk...
Looks the teacher in the eye and says
"Mr Johnson, I have to g-"
Pukes all over Mr. J.
Pukes all over his desk.
All over his computer.
Pukes a little bit on the front row.
Got away scotfree.
Anonymous
>>12330020 Playing basketball with boots? My god, your feet must be destroyed.
Anonymous
>in 12th grade >running late, due to sleeping in >speed all the way to school >cop tries pulling me over >I park >run to class >I open the door >get on the floor >everyone walk the dinosaur
Anonymous
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>>12330056 Well those were not like army boots or something like that.
More like,uhm,"big heavy sneakers" if You can picture it.
Anyway,I think it hurt a lot.
And YES,MY FEET WERE CONSTANTLY FUCKED UP,BUT I had the benefit of no pain while kicking something.
Anonymous
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>>12330020 i love you.
it's fucking ridiculous how a girl can hit/physically abuse a guy as much as they want and it's fine, but as soon as a guy fights back its fucking shitstorm of the century.
atleast i can respond verbally. if a girl pushes me that much i would just absolutely destroy their self confidence.
Anonymous
>12 years old >German class >Teacher is actually German himself and old as fuck >Watch movie about the holocaust, teacher got tears in his eyes >''IT'S OKAY MISTER, WE FORGIVE YOU'' >mfw suspended for two days
Anonymous
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>>12330125 Roommates walked in wondering why I was laughing so hard.
I stole this name
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>>12329888 I get your rage, but I also believe that letting negative meanings destroy positive ones is a worrying sign. Reclaiming the Indo-European symbol that was turned into a sign of hate, righting it, and promoting the good that was once associated with it, is not a negative. Destroying the hold the Nazis have on that symbol cuts away part of their identity, which is a good thing, right?
Anonymous
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>>12330065 I lost a little. Well played. Also :
>biology class,waiting for the teacher >was the dude who was constantly doing funny shit to teachers but still managed to get good grades >talk the whole class into staring at the moose head above the door when the teacher walks in >teacher walks in >EVERYBODY STOOD UP,WITH LOOKS OF AMAZEMENT,AND STARED AT THE MOOSE >the teacher looks up,doesn't understand at what are we lookin' at >she tries to talk to us >this goes on for about 3min >about to stop >some dude from the back throws an apple directly in the moose head >CREEEEEEEEEEEEEK,FALL .......
I thought we will throw up from the amount of laughter had.
Anonymous
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>>12330125 lolol. +1 if you're not jewish. +1000 if you are.
Anonymous
Anonymous
> 5th grade, eating lunch > pretty disgusting mashed potatoes > teacher comes by > I bend my fork to a ninety-degree angle, lift some potato with it and call out "Look miss, a forklift!" > not a single fuck given > year later, same room > big boy called Johannes in one of the parallel classes > generally a bro, but sometimes obnoxious > he's sitting with his back toward me > without knowing why, I pick up my orange and throw it at him > it hits him right smack in the back of the head > try to keep pokerface, but can't control laughter > he pushes me to the floor and buries me under a pile of about 15 chairs > I'm still laughing like mental
Anonymous
>>12330315 >I fell in the moshpit and he picked me up. Just when we recognized each other the crowd seperated us. Never saw him again. now have an epic image of the second of eye contact as realization dawned on both of your faces and you're then swept away by the twisting currents of people
Anonymous
>junior year of HS. >redneck kid who's the star of the wrestling team keeps fucking with me. >he's 1/3rd my size. >i try to warn him off. >does no good. he thinks he can beat my ass. >go to the administration, >they do nothing. >tell me to deal with it. >one day he fucks with me and i'm sick to death of it. >i grab him by his throat, >throw him across the class room. >start hulking out and pounding on him screaming obscenities. >this goes on for about 5 minutes while my teacher goes and gets someone to break it up. >another teacher comes in and places his hand on my shoulder. >i stop. >i stand up, gather my things and go out into the hall way. >the other kid is a bloody mess and he's not getting up. >one of the other teachers whom i'm cool with asked me what happened. >i told him straight up, i got sick of the other kid's shit and he paid the price. >teacher pats me on the shoulder and says good job. >this teacher known about what was going on but couldn't do anything because the kid i beat up was a family member to someone high up in the administration. >PRINCIPAL TIME. >get to office. >the assistant principal who's also the wrestling coach starts yelling at me in my face. >saying that i'm the bully and that he's calling the cops. >i look him in the eye and say, WHOOPIE SHIT. also CALL MY DAD YOU ASSHOLE. >he balls up his fist and i dare him to hit me. >he dosen't. right at that time the campus cop comes over and talks on the phone to my dad. >i'm gonna have to spend the night in jail. >the cop was cool about it. he knew me and knew the situation. before taking me to jail asked if i smoked and offered me a cigarette and we stopped at burgerking. >get to jail. >get released the next day.
Anonymous
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>about 12 years old >playing at a friends place with brooms after watching star wars >FORCE EVERYWHERE >forget that right above us there's a glass-made lamp >swing the broom,everything brakes,glass everywhere >without realising what I'm doing yell "DUDE,LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE,YOU BROKE IT >His parents recognize my voice,a shitstorm at the dude >I quickly escape
Anonymous
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>>12330394 i literally cant help but smiling. i love when douche bags like that get completely fucked over, try to get revenge, then get fucked over again.
Anonymous
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>>12330315 That is an awesome pun to made by a 10/11 year old and that teacher is a tight cunt bitch
Anonymous
>>12330394 what did you sue him for exactly? Harassment?
Anonymous
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>>12330506 yep. and slander as he spread rumors about me. he sued me for hospital bills. i had witnesses to the fact that he harassed me and spread rumors. and i pretty much told the judge that if he hadn't harassed me i wouldn't have beat him up.
judge agreed and seen that i had previously went through proper channels to resolve this and nothing was done so he dismissed the redneck douche's case and awarded me my 1500 dollars plus another 2k in punitative damages.
i was gonna sue the school too but decided that it wasn't worth the hassle.
Anonymous
>awkward girl in basement >listening to THE WALL by pink floyd >shes a /b/tard
Anonymous
> 10th Grade > Chemistry class > Not paying attention > Doodling on my notepad > Kid next to me yakking about some shit to another kid > Teacher flips the fuck out > Grabs chalk eraser > Throws it > Kid ducks like hes fucking Neo or some shit > Get nailed in the face with board eraser > Fall off of chair > Smack head on floor > Unconscious > Wake up about 10 minutes later with no recollection of what happened > mfw nobody realised I wasnt paying attention
Anonymous
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>our school was loosing students,so half of the building got cut off >the other part was given to a school with people who never graduated,got out of those underage jails,and just fucks who steal,beat up people etc >there was this dude who constantly made fun of me while I was walkin' to the school >one day I'm walking to school again,as someone grabs me by the shoulder and the arm,and tries to quickly turn me around,yelling "gimme your phone,you fuck!" >that's it,fucking rage mode,turn around,and punch him in the jaw from the side with all my fucking might >he falls down >walk up to him,take of his hood >it's my classmate
Anonymous
> be in 5th or 6th grade > weird fat albino kid constantly harrasses me, saying wierd shit like "anon I wanna rape you" and "anon i wanna have sex with you" and makes weird faces at me > at this time in life im really shy and introverted but theres only so much a man can take > one day we're next to each other in line at P.E. class, going to play tennis > he starts his shit up again > snap, turn around and start smashing him over the face with my racket > kid screams for me to stop, i end up giving him a black eye, break his glasses, and give him bloody nose > all the other kids treat me like i was some kind of badass disguised as a nerd > mfw
Anonymous
>>12330587 Never look at her again because she's listening to the wall by pink floyd.
Anonymous
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>>12330604 Man, he only wanted to insert his penis into your anus. Why you gotta be hatin'?
Anonymous
>>12330625 >implying pink floyd ISNT godly. Anonymous
>>12330651 >Implying it is I mean, it's certainly good music, but I think it's a bit overrated by most folks
Anonymous
>>12330596 >no recollection >still tells entire story including detailed description of ducking Also a story
>guy from class gets bad grade >we get out and he starts talking shit about teacher who gave him the bad grade >he's almost done and turns around >teacher is right behind him >gets away with nothing because teacher is half bro half asshole, all lazy Anonymous
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>>12330672 i dislike how theyre pegged as a stoners band, but i mean, the subjects the wall touches on about social isolation, drug abuse, and depression arent anything to be taken lightly.
besides, musically, they did something new and were extremely accomplsihed.
Anonymous
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>Grade 3 >We have rock's under the play structures (Skipping rock size) >Rock war of the century >Get caught >20 of us outside principal's office >Teacher walks by >"Uh oh" >lolsallaround.jpg, werehavingagoodtime.gif >Principal comes around the corner >"WHAT DO YOU THINK THIS IS? THIS IS INSANITY, FGANSGIUNDGJNSD!!" for atleast 30 minutes.
Anonymous
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>crafts class >me and two of my buddies decide to build a house >there are these fucking heavy,sturdy desks in the classroom >ram them up,so we get a square >get some big planks,fuck em' up together,and make a roof with handles to hold on to >build some kind of shit so the desks can't be moved one from another >assemble >get in >wait for the teacher >teacher comes in,we start singing some retarded song >everybody is flipping the fuck out,laughing >he tries to rip off the roof,but can't do it >tries to move the desks,but fails >I start talking with him in an old man's voice,talking about taxes,and how I shot nazi's in the ww2 for this home >somehow manage to escape,run around the classroom for a bit >jump out through the window (ground floor) and didn't run,because we knew that He ain't getting out through a window
Anonymous
>10th grade >walk in bathroom to take a piss >notice teacher for the retarded kids waiting outside >go in anyway >pissing >during piss i hear a strange noise coming from stall, kinda like someone was smaking their lips. >expected sex or fapping >go to wash hands >retarded kid comes out covered in shit >Retarded kid in school ATE HIS OWN SHIT. >Facepalm X1000000
Anonymous
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>5th grade i think >playing some game involving running with bro's during break >one moment i'm running but not looking where im going >next im standing outside IT classroom >HOLYFUCKINGWHATTHESHIT >next i know im sitting in a chair facing a computer >omfgagia349gfgkakfmgka holy god im terrified >hear a teacher say something along the lines of "anon, how's your head?" >i dont reply, everythings blurry >i start crying, realise i cant remember a thing >go to nurses office >apparently i had some concussion or something
Anonymous
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>>12329888 too bad you werent born yet, and didnt know any of them faggot.
Quityourbitchin.jpg
Anonymous
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>>12330783 Fucking tards man
>8th Grade, chilling in PE >The special ed class is brought in for their hour in the yard >Think nothing of it >Continue to talk to my friend >Suddenly, we hear this braying shriek coming >Look over at the other side of the gym >Black Tard has somehow gotten his pants off >He's also gotten Girl Tard's pants down around her ankles >The braying sound is her screaming as he chases Shit was fucked up.
Anonymous
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>>12330677 Its amazing how much info you can get when you ask a class full of other people what happened.
Anonymous
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>>12329888 You're a fucking moron for not recognizing that a symbol can have multiple meanings.
Anonymous
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>>12327846 what do you think meanwhile in Germany meant?
Anonymous
School story time? Yay!>be quiet, over sensitive kid >get targeted by a "Mean Girls" group >people fucking with me from morning until evening and i have a crying fit every time >teachers see this and do nothing about it >my mom decides to transfer me to another school >fuck year revenge time >the very next day i calmly walk into homeroom >hang up my stuff >pick up a chair >and beat the ringleader with it Rika style >teacher sees this and doesn't do a thing >i spend my last week randomly beating up my former bullies >teachers and dean see this and barely intervene >i leave with respect from most of the people in my grade >assume nice, quiet persona >some girls want to make the new girl their target >they confront me afterschool >"hey guys i just wanna be friends!" >bitchslapped >i go from 0 to BERSERK in 1.2secs >next thing i remember, i'm being escorted back to the school building by security guards >one of the guards gives me the RESPECK knuckles because he didn't like one of the girls >the girls get suspended for fighting >i get off with a warning from the dean >and somehow earn some kind of fearful respect from the rest of the school
Dominus_Blicero !!JTPPaYpff
>5th grade >me and my friend orchestrate "pit fights" >had kids fight each other for "points" >kid broke his leg after having it jammed against the wall of the enclosure we were using as an arena >get ratted out >suspended >trollfaces everywhere >kid's mom comes and bitches at me during pick-up >tell her off for bitching at a 10 year old kid >applause >brofists
Anonymous
>>12331103 >tell her off for bitching at a 10 year old kid The fuck? It's arguably 10 year old kids who need more bitching at, because of how fucking retarded they are.
Anonymous
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>first grade >my mom babysits a kid across the street in the morning because his parents work early >we're playing a game and he has one of the towels with an animal hood on >it's a sheep i hate sheep >he bites my thigh >blood EVERYWHERE >"ryan, sheep don't bite." >he leaves a month later never to been seen again
Dominus_Blicero !!JTPPaYpff
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>>12331163 I suppose so. But she was really letting me have it. It would have been more appropriate to talk to my parents or the principal.
Anonymous
>5th grade >recess >whole class is playing tag >the blind kid is "it" >runs into a pole, the crack of his head rings through the yard >his eyes are glass so they can't check his pupils for dilation >massive concussion >mfw a blind kid was playing tag
Anonymous
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>5th grade, few days after sex ed talk >girl in class on period, blood in her pants etc. >roflcopter among boys >AT LUNCH with bros >kid eating applesauce >pour cherry koolaid into his applesauce >mix it with a fork >'Hey everyone, look, it's femanon's!' >trollface.jpg
Anonymous
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>>12331054 This is far and away the most feel-good school story I've ever seen a girl post.
Anonymous
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>>12330394 Just curious, what did you sue him for? Emotional distress for bullying or what? And why was his case dismissed? Not saying you didn't have a right to do what you did, im just curious if the legal system just sorta ignored the fact that you assaulted him or whaat
Anonymous
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>>12330391 To help the image: I had waist-long straight hair, he had a mohawk.
It was definitely an epic moment.
Quoted By:
Thank you, robots. Thank you. This is a thread of constant lols and victorious brofist worthy moments. This thread is the best. :3
Anonymous
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>10th grade, Theology class (lolcatholicschool) >discussing 'Rape of Dinah' in the Bible >black loud kid asks something offensive about rape >teacher facepalms and reprimands him >5 minutes later >black loud kid turns around to harass quiet kid >quiet kid gives him death stare >black loud kid shouts "Teacher, quiet kid just visually raped me!"
Anonymous
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>>12330394 god damn I wished I could rampage on a few people during middle school
but it was a catholic school, some kids got expelled for simply starting a fight even if no serious injury resulted
I realised my parents were really making an effort to pay that private school, so i just took all the shit from these retards and got into a good highschool and now a good university, some of them never graduated highschool or barely did
Anonymous
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One of my better stories. I went to a brotier school.>Built like a football player, but on the soccer team. (school didn't have football) >Walking back to car after practice >See team captain, one of the most athletic kids at our school, could more than likely kick my ass in a fight >Put on rageface >Walk towards his car, in an incredibly pissed off manner >Tell him "I heard what you've been saying, I'm gonna kick the everloving shit out of you" at 20 feet out >He drops his gym bag next to his car and fucking starts sprinting away >Laugh, tell him I was just joking around >Brofist, while trollfacing
Anonymous
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>In middle school, end of final year >at choir concert at high school i will go to next year >word is spread of fucking insane bathroom mess with blood and shit everywhere >go to bathroom, stall is the most disgusting thing ever >someone decides we should draw straws to see who should go in there and piss on the mess >i have to do it >have no idea principal was listening to us the whole time >go to stall, take out dick, start pissing >principal casually enters the same stall and starts pissing >i quickly put my dick away and just stare him in the eyes with this "WTF?!" look on my face >he says "i wanted to help you with your prank" and smiles >tell no one >two years later he is arrested for grabbing a kid's crotch >mfw
Anonymous
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>>12324630 >mfw both meanings of principle (original and misspelled version of principal) fit in OP's story Anonymous
>Find an old sandwich sitting in a plastic bag in a ditch by my friend's school >Being the idiot 12 year olds that we were, we decide to pee in the bag and seal it up >Come back about a month later >Sandwich bag still there >Stomp on bag >Bag explodes, mutant festering sandwich mold and piss ever >Smells worse than a rotting corpse >Friend pukes everywhere >mfw
Anonymous
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>be in class >have substitute teacher >friend gets called on to read out loud >he pretends to not be able to read >everyone in class laughs at him >sub freaks out and calls everyone in the class sick individuals >mfw
Anonymous
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>6th Grade >New Cholo kid whose a total shitfuck comes in >He's a retard, he steals my best friend, and everyone but my friend completley hates him >One day on the playground, he's talking shit, calling me a fatass (which I am). >Oh hell no. >Tackle him onto the ground and pin him. >He fights with spit and bites >You gotta be shitting me >Pimp Slap him >Nerds and outsiders cheering me on from the monkeybars >feelsgoodman >Walking to science classroom >Little shitfuck starts trash talking this hot chick >"Dude, shut the fuck up" >"Chaddap, faddass!" >Oh hell no v2 >Act calm, sit down in class, whatever. >Calls hot chick a bitch >Fuck it >Grab blue erasable pen >Hold it sideways, as if it was a handlebar >Push myself with my foot, so my chair slides in his direction >The pen rapes his thigh and he howls like the fucker that he is >Teacher comes in and asks what the fuck just happened >All 3 of us get sent to the office >Only he gets in trouble >Principal acts like i'm a knight >Chick says "You're nicer than I thought you were >Fuck year
Anonymous
>8th grade >Be the fat kid >Lunch is unbearable, too poor for bagged lunch >Dance for food >"Go hula dance in the middle of their half-court game" >Ok.jpg >Pelted with basketball >Asthma attack >PE >Looking for food in backpacks >Get caught by best bud >Loltellsonme >Follow him around the next day because I almost got arrested >Too beta to kick his ass >6' foot black girl picking on me >Remember rumors of her >"At least my uncle never raped me!" >She chases me >"Ned's Survival Guide, to the office!" >Doesn't work well >Puberty >Gets over asthma >Skinnier >Kid picking on me >he's even more beta >Pick on him as much as he does me (Only when his "bodyguard" is around does he fuck with me) >One day he slaps me >"I... what?" >Backhand him >He cries >More scavenging for food >Door opens (In locker room) >Run like a motherfucker >Take off jacket and sit on bleachers >Security speedwalking out >Never caught >"Bodyguard" kid picking on me >Fight in the courtyard >Turns into some sort of deathmatch between my friends and his as well >Expelled
Anonymous
Quoted By:
>>12325775 Kind of the same story
>in 9th grade >kid in front of me asks the teacher to go to the batheroom >teacher a dick social studies teacher >says learning is more important, can use the washroom on his own time >kid sits back down >i smell piss >suddenly a pool of piss surrounds my desk >everyone laughs >i call him piss boy till 11th grade >mfw no one else remembered him peeing himself Anonymous
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>>12331872 I have always longed for a group battle like that. I'm still waiting for the day one of my bros gets into a fight so I can rush in and kick some ass with him.
Anonymous
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>9th grade >sit next to a girl you hate >girl steals your chicken sandwich >girl throws it at the maths teacher we both hate >mfw
Anonymous
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>fillipino best friend >goes to Philippines for a few weeks >I tell everyone he got hit by a bus and died >mfw some girl with a crush on him started crying >mfw when he shows up a month and a half later
Anonymous
>>12331872 that show's not that old faggot, come back when you're 18.
Anonymous
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>>12326241 >>12326265 Mrs. Hutchinson!?!??!?!1
Anonymous
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>in French class >mentally unstable teacher, we fuck with her mercilessly >some dirtbag kid from Louisiana is in our class, he's the worst >me and my faggot friends start making this loud high-pitched humming sound every time she turns her back >she flips out >we keep doing it >she blames the Louisianan kid >"BUT I AIN'T DID NOTHIN'" (or however they talk) >gets kicked out >angrily slams the door on her on his way out >catches her finger on accident, ruins her wedding ring and fucks her finger up >she just sits down and starts crying over the ring and pain, has a girl lead the class for the rest of the period >Louisianan is expelled from high school because the teacher said he did it on purpose, he becomes a drug dealer in my neighborhood >my fucking face
Anonymous
>incredibly stupid kid, still am this day actually >don't understand chemistry one fucking bit >get split off the lab tables >Climb on top of one and just start sleeping >teacher doesn't even notice until 5 minutes before class is about to be over >She was cool about it though, she knew I had no future so I might as well enjoy my time at school before I got stuck cleaning toilets or whatever
Anonymous
>annoying as hell black girl is always picking on me >she's a total bitch >one time there was some sort of soccer game and she starts pulling on my clothes etc. (not in a nice way) >tell her to fuck off and leave me alone, she just gets more agressive. >call her a black bitch >she goes crying to the teacher because I made a racist comment >fucking commie teacher suspends me for a day and makes me write a gigantic letter about racism.
Anonymous
>>12332096 I'm turning 18 in 4 days.
Ashmous sons
Anonymous
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>>12332186 another story
>Be in English 11th grade >Only kid not smart enough to get exempt from final exam, only person there >teacher feels bad for me >tells me to write "What I learned this year" >She doesn't even read, just gives me a 90 because it seems like a fair trade off that would help boost my grade a little Anonymous
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>asshole kids who harass class when teacher is gone > teacher is gone alot >favorite punching bag of theirs >friends and i beat on each other all the time just for fun and takes alot to really hurt us >teacher steps out for whatever ever reason and assholes decided to flip a shit >one next to me jumps up and flips his desk end over end at me >smashed into me, knokcing me and my desk down >asshole crowd laughs and beta fuckers just ignore >get up with pokerface >grab a pair of scissors from the knocked over desk >fling them ninja star style at asshole and catch him in the temple > bleeding from his head and cussing a storm >Teacher comes in and flips a shit also >assholes rat me out but no one else in class backs them up >sent off to nurse and i was never bothered again >feelsgoodman.jpg
Anonymous
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>reading thread >people post stories without greentext >skip stories, scroll to nearest greentext one >not a single fuck was given
Anonymous
>>12332208 >Write paragraph about reverse racism >Use every racial slur you can think of as page filler >And not a single fuck That's how you do it, mange.
Anonymous
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>this entire thread
Anonymous
>>12332262 I really hope you are trolling dude.
Since when is black a racial slur? And what other racials slurs did you see?
Idiot...
Anonymous
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>>12332227 then go away till then fuckface.
reported.
Anonymous
>>12332298 Anon was clearly just providing you guidance on how that sort of letter should be written, not describing your post. How does I shot reading comprehension
Anonymous
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>>12332208 Btw, this happened when I was like 12 or 13 or something.
When we got older things actually worked out between us.
Anonymous
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>>12332323 Now that I read it again, could be.
Not a natice english speaking and a bit drunk at the moment.
Anonymous
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>9th Grade >Scottish kid wears kilt one day, no teachers protest >One male kid decides to wear a skirt to class one day because we convinced him to >Our french teacher FLIPS THE FUCK OUT >He calmly retorts that if Scottish people are allowed to wear kilts, he can wear a skirt. >She doesnt buy it, he's forced to change into pants >Two days later >School wide assembly >Principal talks about the importance of 'proper gender' clothing. >Our entire french class bursts into laughter when we realize that we caused this assembly >My face
Anonymous
Oh boy, here we go.>high school chem class >some experiment that involves heating something in a tiny ceramic crucible >fucking crucible cracks due to heat, shit spills, have to clean it up and try again >brilliant plan: put a paper towel under it, in case it spills >it cracks and spills again, this time after glowing hot >paper goes up in flames >mon visage quand
Anonymous
>>12332576 Same class, different day:
>experiment using (what I assume to have been highly diluted) sulphuric acid >unbeknownst to me, spill some on the counter >rest bare arm on counter >FIRE DRILL, EVERYONE LET'S GO OUT OF THE BUILDING >standing outside >gee, my arm feels OH GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING TO MEEEEEEE >mein Gesicht wenn Anonymous
>>12332631 Same class, different day
>classroom equipped with emergency shower in case of chemical burns >shower has drain in its floor >one day, class starts to smell funny >assume someone farted >shortly thereafter, brown stuff bubbling up through the shower drain >IT'S SHIT >LIQUID SHIT >class dismissed also, same class
>teacher is dyslexic >tries to write stoichiometry on the board >nope.avi
Quoted By:
>>12332706 Fuckin lol'd at
>IT'S SHIT >LIQUID SHIT Anonymous
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>>12331698 Justin, get off 4chan.
Anonymous
oh god i have a godly one.
Anonymous
>>12332992 you know when friends are standing around telling funny stories then someone crosses the line and says something that's not funny and is just disgusting?
Anonymous
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>>12329922 similar
>friend and i decide to skip this class by jumping out tha window >all goes well bout 2 start walking home >dickhead friend realizes he left his pen in tha classroom >he goes back tells teacher i jumped out window and he left class to try get me 2 come back >next day at school i get a suspension >MFW friend is laying on ground with broken nose. Anonymous
>Elementary school >Grade 1 or 2 I think >Some girl comes up to me in class >Discreetly asks if I want to see her underwear >Panic >Tackle her into a radiator >Principle's office
Anonymous
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>>12333085 amen. that story was not funny at all
Erik
>10th Grade >Racing friend from A wing to the library >I take a weird route through a building because it's faster >Jump up two step staircase >Just as I land some ass hat trips me >Slam on ground and slide a foot or so because I was in full sprint >He lols >I have a short temper and aggression issues >I grab my math book, 300 pages or so and a hardcover, and slam him in the back of the head as hard as I could >Unconscious immediately >I lol >Get away with only the rest of the year in In School Suspension because of documented aggression issues >Mfw
Anonymous
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>>12332992 >it smelled of slim jims and the holocaust Jesus Christ.
That's the greatest descriptive text ever written.
Anonymous
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>About 10 years old in elementary school (don't know what grade this would be in an American school, but grade 7 here) >Be social, have most emails from everyone in my class >Find out about site where you can mail to someone using someone else's email >Send a lot of emails from everyone to everyone how they like them and want to grope them and such >Massive shitstorm in class, teacher mad as hell >No one suspects me >Trollface.jpg
noko
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>Christmas morning I'm five years old. >Receive awesome paddle ball toy the one with the string and ball >Can't wait to play with toy but can't tear open the extremely strong plastic with my feeble five year old arms >Grab Swiss army knife and begin to furiously cut >Pull blade towards be while cutting instead of away >Slip and send blade into my eyeball >Don't tell parents for hours for fear of being punished >Spend Christmas night in hospital receiving emergency surgery >mfw
Anonymous
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>>12333184 >Tackle her into a radiator i'm still fucking loling... ohgod...
Anonymous
>Story 1/2
Anonymous
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ANDY?!
Anonymous
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>>12333229 this isn't impressive. You're just a frustrated fag
Anonymous
>Story 2/2
Anonymous
>>12333434 >continued He then had to go up to his teachers and explain why his coursework and essays and shit will miss the deadline. They were not impressed and he received many a bollocking, which he had to take like a whore. They instructed him to get the IT department to take a look at it to make sure that the files were really gone (they didn't trust him and thought he was trying to spin an extra few days to finish the work).
Being a good friend, I agreed to hang about with him after school while he got the IT Tech guys (/b/tards if ever I saw them) to have a look at his system. We go into the IT lab, log on and he goes to get one of the technicians. In that time, I move all his files back to their original location.
He gets a bollocking for trying to dodge the deadlines and is given a detention on a Saturday.
He never suspected a thing...
Anonymous
Anonymous
>>12333392 Haha, a guy actually legit deleted my entire GCSE IT coursework, and I didn't realise until weeks later, when all the final pre exam deadlines came up.
Knowing I'd failed the course, I fucked around for the whole final exam. I think my best answer was a question about internet safety, where I wrote a short story about this guy I knew on an MMO. He was an alcoholic dwarf IRL, we were best bros.
Anonymous
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>be 15, eurofag >first year of highschool >teacher tells me to ask another teacher in another classroom for chalk >go to random classroom, embarrassed >get 2 small pieces of chalk >bring it to teacher >kicks me in the ass because small chalk is small
Anonymous
>>12333457 Now that guy was a *real* prick. At least I didn't actually delete any coursework
Anonymous
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> In 7th grade > have a substitute teacher for the day > everone misbehaves > BE QUIET YOU, YOU, NINCOMPOOPS! > everyone laughs and calls her a nincompoop > some people start to tell her she hurt their feelings by calling them names > she ends up crying and flees the room > I lol'ed > be a fifth grader in missouri, small school, just moved there > all ten year olds rush to bathroom durring breaks tto get tampons, loudly talking about periods > one day have young substitute history teacher > ten year old girl reaches out as he passes by and grabs his ass > he gets embarrassed and goes up to front of the room > all girls bu me giggle > mfw I wonder why southern girls are such whores
Anonymous
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>Be really sick senior year >Miss at least a month of class at one point >Cant study/do work >Worried about making up all of that in short amount of time >Teachers let me off very easy with work >Get back day before AP testing (didnt know when tests were until I got there that day) >Get straight A's that semester, awesome scores on the AP tests. >Best year of school by far
Anonymous
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>>12333598 Yeah, I wasn't too fussed though, nobody ever did any work in the IT lessons, and one day after an exam me and him started a huge food fight in the prefect hut, he was actually kind of a bro.
Anonymous
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>>12330604 > snap, turn around and start smashing him over the face with my racket > kid screams for me to stop, i end up giving him a black eye, break his glasses, and give him bloody nose IDK if this is true...Albino kids have reaaalllyy bad eyesight/acuity so they probably couldnt even distinguish a tennis ball. And they can't really be outside cause of their skin. You beat up an Albino kid...good job I guess
Anonymous
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>>12333434 >>12333441 >Being a good friend lol, no
So you know who's saying what
My sophomore year had one amazing moment for my buddy Dave. Dave was literally known as "The Chill One". He always was laid-back, and almost never got stressed or upset, no matter how much of an ass you were. Oh, and because it's relevant, he has a mixed Jewish and Gypsy heritage.
So you know who's saying what
So I want to lean out the window and yell my worst dead baby jokes for MAXIMUM TROLLAN. But Dave just says this entire long stretch mobbed with dickheads to "Stay chill, man. Don't go starting shit and give them what they want."
Anonymous
>>12333953 F5 F5 F5
Where's part 3, god damn it? It's been nearly 10 minutes.
Anonymous
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>>12333953 Type faster!
Also, archive requests!
Anonymous
>>12334078 Option A: Anon's a faggot who doesn't know to Notepad that shit and post all at once
Option B: We've been trolled
Anonymous
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I'd say trollface.flac is what that guy has now.
Anonymous
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>>12333883 >>12333953 There is absolutely fuckall reason for you to have split this into three posts
Anonymous
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>>12334101 In case we've been trolled, Part three:
Dave gets out and punches and kicks the person. Then five others who try to defend. Then screams profanities. Then drives off. Then the cop comes and he's a real bro.
Anonymous
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Great stuff, anon. I suppose I'll contribute, but I can't think of much off the top of my head.>In 5th grade >Playing steal the bacon* in PE >6th grade girl from opposing team runs across and nabs our bacon >I chase her down to tag her out >Unintentionally get a handful of boob >She's mad at me for some reason >Nobody else noticed >In 8th grade (different school) >Dumbass is picking on me in the locker room before PE, I tell him to stop >He goes apeshit, sucker punches me >I'd never fought before, go down, take a few hits to the face >Kick at him enough so he relents >I get up, give him a through cussing-out >Clean up my bloody nose and lip, head out to the track >Tell a teacher what happened >She gets the principal, I relate my side of the story >Dumbass gets five-day suspension, I get nothing (perks of having a good reputation) >Everyone is surprised when I come to school the next day (just a black eye, split lip, and wounded pride; nothing to stay home for) >At lunch a teacher takes me aside and tells me that the high school kids are proud of me >lolwut?
So you know who's saying what
Quoted By:
Dave: "Who the hell do you think you are?"
So you know who's saying what
>>12334101 Option A. I was born with a terrible case of the herpaderps.
Anonymous
>>12334260 You also apparently type slower than my fucking grandma
So you know who's saying what
>>12334279 No, just had to go take a piss.
Anonymous
>>2332706 Lol, reminds me of a chem class ways back
>We were using hydrochloric acid solution for our lab >Stoner kid that likes to mess around comes in late after the safety instructions >Hes holding a beaker filled with hydrochloric acid >Holding it with one hand, loosely >Bumps into another anon, lets go of the beaker and spills all down his leg and into his shoe >Teacher immediately races him to the shower, telling him to take off his clothes >Dude is completely naked, covering his junk tho >Teacher turns on shower >We are in a relatively new part of the school, showers haven't been tested >Brownish clunks of...idk what spewed out. I think it was a mixture of mud, and water that's been in the pipes for years and years. Smelled awful >Teacher -Ohshit!.jpg >Teacher runs him down the entire hall, naked, as the acid is on the guys leg and foot >Takes him to another class, which is full, and makes him use the shower >Pic: our face when he returned We were good bro's though, to turn the situation into a positive one, we rumored around that he had a huge dick.
Anonymous
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>>12334301 Thanks for finished. I'm going to bed now, goodnight brobots.
Been a good day with this thread on the side.
So you know who's saying what
(cont.) So Dave was pretty popular in school after this, no one had ever seen that side of him before. I for one was amazed. Later that day we went back to my place and started playing some vidya, and just generally screwing around and I told Dave I was impressed at how he stood up for himself and that I'd always been attracted to him. It turned out he had long felt the same way about me. Dave began to unzip his pants and slowly removed his large cock, I watched it grow in size before my eyes as it got harder and harder. I couldn't resist anymore, and started to suck it like a vacuum. He came after about ten minutes and told me it was the best orgasm he ever had and I glowed with pride having satisfied him so thoroughly.
Anonymous
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>sophomore year in highschool >friends with everyone but this one fucking wannabe jock and his friends >he only goes for non cut sports because he can't make the football team >does shit like sneeze on people, scratch his balls then put his hands on people's faces >hear he got a girlfriend >see him talking with her, acting like an asshole to her >he walks away >go up to her >"So, you like being his girlfriend huh?" >she admits he's an asshole to her >tell her that she can do with much better >she asks who >mfw I boned his girlfriend a few weeks later
Anonymous
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>>12334260 >a terrible case of the herpaderps. now I've lost it
I can go study now, that's enough laughs to last me the whole rest of the week.
So you know who's saying what
>>12334340 Well played, very well played. Funny part is, my GF at the time pretty much wanted something like that to happen.
Anonymous
>get reacquainted with friend from juve >go to his place one evening to smoke some dank >he tells me offhandedly that his brother is living with him as I enter his apartment >his brother is into some pretty bad shit >crackhead, burglar, former manwhore, mugger >he's scary as fuck >as we're sitting in the living room watching TV and smoking, he comes in, sits right next to me, and nonchalantly lights a crack pipe >dude >he starts making strange guttural sounds >he picks up 2 alligator clips and puts them on his nipples >he asks me to pull them >dismiss him as if he's joking, laugh awkwardly >he looks at me as if I insulted him >crackhead tell his brother that he needs to talk to him in another room >he sounds serious >they walk away >I'm fearing for my life, I'm sure he wants to kill me >hear them coming back >oh god, I'm dead... >they're wearing boxers, pulled up into their asses to look like thongs >they're giving me a mock lap dance >OH GOD YOU FUCKING FAGGOTS, GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE >they're laughing their asses off >mfw
Anonymous
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>>12334418 I jelly. I very, sincerely jelly.
Anonymous
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>>12334313 Still must've scared him for life...Brofist for that end part robot. Brofist indeed.
Anonymous
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11/12 years old>Organise 'SlugFest' at lunchtime in middle school >Recruit younger kids into one of the two teams >Use younger kids as cannon fodder >Charge through a tide of shrieking 8/9 year olds >Get to the real team, a load of bro's in my year >Duke it out until our team emerges victorious >Head teacher bans 'Bulldog' permanently >mfw our team emerges undefeated
Anonymous
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>Get bullied at highschool for 2 years cause I'm a pacifist >Main bully slams me into locker trying to act cool >Rage mode activated >Slam him in the stomach >He doubles over >Elbow him in the back >He falls down >I grab him, pull him close to my face >Tell him not to do that again or he will regret it >It was just after lunch, still had 2 periods to go, fuck it go home, play Warcraft3 >He bitches to principal, he knows he was bullying me >He gets suspended for 2 weeks, I get nothing >mfw
Anonymous
>>12332576 in high school chem vein,
>cracking some random hydrocarbon in test tube >shitloads of heat >all of a sudden, the test tube begins to droop >holyshitwhatdowedowhatdowedo >glass completely softens in the middle, test tube is now at a right angle >small bubble forms on glass >shitshit should we tell someone? >bubble pops, ignition occurs >large bang, lots of glass, minor cuts >problem solved. we don't know how it happened, we figure it was a dodgy test tube, but we weren't expecting it to happen and out of the three of us we all just stood there staring.
Anonymous
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>>12334566 something similar happened to me in highschool, it was wicked!
Anonymous
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>>12334313 Yeah, emergency showers are almost guaranteed to contain shitty water. The older the building is, the worse the water will be. Shit doesn't really circulate in the pipes.
Reminds me of a story:
>In college, Chem 1225 >Hottest girl in class drops a thermometer >Class goes silent with the gentle tinkling of glass on the floor >Bro on the opposite side of the room yells, "Take off your clothes and get under the shower!" >Class bursts into laughter >youhadtohavebeenthere.jpg Same class
>Lab partner is a senior Econ major >Hadn't had a chem class since high school >Needed a science class with a lab in order to graduate >Chem II was the only thing that fit into his schedule >mfw I ended up doing all the work and we're always the last to leave class (but still 30-45 early nonetheless) He wasn't a bad guy, but knew nothing about lab protocol and I ended up trying to teach concepts I barely understood.
Anonymous
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>>12334379 What's his reaction to South Park?
Anonymous
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this thread is fucking amazing /r9k/
Anonymous
>Grade 9. >Be massive asshole. >Have spineless beta minions. >Start insulting a Jewish girl, saying lulzy things like "Go back to the kitchen and get your family out of the oven." >Goes on for 2 months. >She has emo slut girlfriend. Yes they were lez. >Have nigger in my horde, treat him no better. >He sides with them. >Principle tiem. >Meeting is set for the next day. >Plan ahead, prepare my case. >Meeting tiem, spineless councilor takes me away and has a 1 on 1 talk. Asks me why I did that and if I think that what I am doing is ok. >Put on my innocent face and say "I was just very worried for my friend, emoslut and jewbag do drugs and are pulling him (nigra) into that too." >He srs. >I weave an intricate web of lies, covering them in a metric fuckton of dirt. >Next thing you know, he asks me why I said racist comments to her. >Tell him that I am also Jewish, and that the way she acted really made me ashamed of my heritage and that I tried to take out my self-hate on her. >He nods. >We walk out of the office, her calls them in, I flash them my bestest trollface. They later get in so much trouble that I even thought it was Overkill. >That evening, sit at my computer. >justasplanned.jpeg
Anonymous
>>12335642 There is just no way this is true.
NONE.
Anonymous
>>12335741 I assure you sir, this is the truest truth.
What part of this saga do you find impossible?
Anonymous
>>12335775 It's just too stupid, it really is. How would anyone who's delt with teenagers not see past this and check with parents?
codeOuroboros
Quoted By:
>6th grade >huge kids on the bus start picking on me and my fat cousin >we exchange curse words, seems harmless enough >one of the kids hits my cousin in the stomach >ohhellno.jpg >tell driver, manage to get kids expelled just for that >never liked those kids anyway >7th grade, no one fucks with me, not out of fear but because they have no reason to >some fat kid comes by acting like a dick >tell him to fuck off and spew a ton of curses and insults >he pushes me >fall so I just barely don't hit a pole >get up, tell vice principal, he calls everyone who saw it over >oh shit oh shit I don't even know half of these people >they all say i did nothing wrong >vice principal says he wants to get me in trouble too but has no proof I started shit with the fat kid >fat kid gets suspended for three days >comes back, says we're cool, brofists me >wat
Anonymous
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>>12335939 Beats me.
Then again, he was pretty new to this, and he was also pretty spineless.
There is also the fact that it was a super prude private school, and if word that some of the students smoked pot got out, it'd cause a shit storm, to them keeping face/keeping the school free of drugs/pulling in max cash > racism and other faggotry.
Anonymous
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>highschool >sophomore year >math class >big fucking class, long way to the back >teacher is old, he had a back injury the year before >he is strung out on painkillers, doped up for most of the day, especially after lunch when our class is. >I constantly make pigeon bird call sounds at the back of the room when he is going through the lesson at the front >most of the class smiles and looks at me >teacher "who ever keeps making those sounds please stop" >my friends plus most of the class "what are you talking about? we don't hear anything"
Anonymous
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Go in class with 2 other people for 4 years. Having a hard time to concentrate. Really calm class and the 2 teatcher we have are really nice.>Oh god.. why have i come home?!
charli kaley
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>crazy seriously most scary kid in 7th-8th grade in my class >showed up to school stoned in the 7th grade all the time >anger issues, yelled at teachers, threw around desks, banged walls when he was pissed >literally masturbated his penis during a state test in class >had like 73 absences in 8th grade from truancy >mean to like everybody, nobody confronts him, got into fight on like the 3rd day of 8th grade and fucked the kid up >dealt drugs in 8th grade, stole stuff, ran with a "gang" of high schoolers, he was seriously tough as a bowl of nails without any milk >have nothing against him, don't really talk to him >one day at lunch he starts bothering me >tell him to stop >he continues >fire back one witty remark >it escalates, he's pissed >really starts insulting me >rage mode, tackle him into the dust and asphalt, really gritty and jsut awesome to remember. >he wrestles me off him, mumbles angrily, curses me out, walks away. >cool from then on >seriously very cool. joke around, fun to be had. >i hear he's really trying hard in high school now and is a respectable student who wants to be a doctor someday. >goodforhim!.jpg
Anonymous
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>>12327490 wtfamirading.jpeg
Anonymous
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>In art class in middle school, 7th grade >Hated teacher, always fucked with her >this particular day I spray painted my name on all the tables(there were paper bags taped over all the tables) >squirted a bottle of green paint into teachers chair >poured a bottle of glue on table >Sent to principal's office for the glue thing >teacher forgets to say I'm coming down >sitting there missing classes for 2 periods looking at yearbooks with a friend who got sent there too >Teacher comes by to tell principal about the paint thing, doesn't know who did it or what period it happened in >Nobody cares about the glue thing now because the paint was smeared all over her ass >They go to talk in principals office, I'm still sitting there >2 8th grade girls walk by, one my then gf >tell them why I'm there, say I think they know I did the paint thing >gf decides to confess to putting the paint in the chair and saying it was an accident >lol >last day, didn't really care about her and she was going to hs, last time I saw her >lol more
Anonymous
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let's archive this shit now... 3 requests so far
Anonymous
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>6th Grade >Like the lazy fuck i was, i copy and pasted an entire article for my assingment >Teacher sees me doing it >Yells at me to give me the paper >I felt like running from the fat bitch >Ran around a table a couple of times >Told her that if she would lay her mouth of them twinkies should could catch me >I run to the office >I get to stay in the office for the rest of the day >The main story all my friends and i talk about when remembering that year >mfw
Anonymous
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>freshman >do weapon demonstration with 12th grade brother in a talent show like 2 months into the year >Was using a bo (think donatello) >pretty much left alone >10th grade brothers gone so pretty much the only badass in school (it's fucking Canada and a small town) >two 12th graders walk up to me when i'm walking home one has a long stick >"what now bitch I have the stick?" >tries to hit me >grab it >yank it out of his hands >break it over my knee >take one step towards them and they bolt >everyone waiting for the buses saw it >end up helping the two kids with math >really shy normally so they introduce me to some girls >still help them with math on occasion
Anonymous
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Just thought of one.>Sociology class, senior year of high school >Have a class with best friend (only the 3rd class in the 7 years I knew him we had together) >Teacher does assignment where we walk to different parts of the rooms depending on which point of view we have on a certain subject >Friend and I sit on one side of the room on a counter the whole time, just because dont really feel like moving at all. >Successfully argue the points given, no matter which approach we have to take. >I come up with many ideas, he articulates them, Im too introverted and he is the exact opposite >Fairly controversial subject comes up, we still dont feel like getting up so we come up with the counterpoint. Its been so long since then, I cant remember what it was. >Everyone but us is on the other side of the class, shocked to see us there >We validly argue the position and end up converting a few people over to our side and making many others feel stupid. >Bros for life
Anonymous
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Does no-one on 4chan know how to spell "princepelle" correctly?
Anonymous
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>>12331191 at least you included him into the game
Anonymous
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When I was in 5th grade me and my friends would play Ed,Edd, & Eddy (yes), I was Ed because I never did any schoolwork.
Anonymous
Threads kinda dead so I'm umping with my story.>Internationalfag here went to a British School in Austria >Troll Music teacher all year long. >Behave bad as fuck but she doesn't get on my case because my classmates were trolling her hardcore >Music teacher is a lesbian with hairy armpits >Find out her home adress, send her some deodorant and some deodorant >Another time I'm up there doing an oral presentation >Everybody's talking >Tells the class that she'll give me a zero if they continue talking >Talking continues >Tells me she's giving me a zero >Dun really give a fuck about the class but decide to rage for fun >Take a handful of coins from and throw them against the wall really hard as I'm raging >Teacher's stunned >MFW I continue my presentation like nothing happened >Another time draw a huge dick on the playground, where like the elementary kids walked by. >Teacher somehow finds out I did it (Somebody ratted me out) >Imply it wasn't me >Insists I did it >Have to clean up the drawing and no further punishments were given.
Anonymous
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Thanks for your request.
Anonymous
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Bump for moar and for archive
Anonymous
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>>12338202 ...but...but where did the change come from?
Anonymous
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>Junior year of high school >Substitute teacher in AP English III >Friend and I switch spots >Halfway through class, admit that we had switched spots and she had our names switched >She thinks we're joking >We're laughing, but we get the rest of the class to back us up and she believes us >Senior year >Same substitute in AP Literature >Sit in our assigned seats this time >She tells us to switch seats and mixes up our names >It was pretty much the same group as the English III class, so we all start laughing hysterically >She remembers what happened the year before and laughs it off, calls both of us "hey, you, whatever your name is" for the rest of the class
Anonymous
>Be in 2nd or 3rd grade >All boys had to skip/jog the long path to the bathrooms since they were farther than the girls' >One day me and my bros decide its time to play Mario Kart >We all pick our characters and then start at a certain crack in the pavement. >3...2...1...GO!!! >We speed down the path to get to the pisser first. >One friend trips on nothing. Totally eats shit hard. >All of us turn and see. >LOL >Keep racing, DGAF >We get to the bathroom (I don't fucking remember who won, but it was still awesome) >All piss in urinals >About one minute later kid who fell comes in, face all bloody, knee and hands scraped up. Crying. >In an angry/pissy/whiny voice he yells "8TH, 8TH, 8TH, 8TH, 8TH!!!!!" While pointing at us individually. (This was supposed to the be the place we came in for laughing at him. And he had sort of a lisp, so it sounded more like AAIFF, AAIFF, AAIFF, AAIFF, AAIFF!!!!!) >We all had finished pissing at this point. >Just look at him >BUST OUT LAUGHING DGAF!!!! >He bawws
Anonymous
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>>12338743 another story from the same grade
>FUCKING PAINTING!!!! >Me and my bro are told to go to the bathrooms to wash our brushes after finishing painting. >We sword fight with the paint brushes the whole way there. >Get to the bathrooms, continue sword fighting. >Finish the fight and wash them fuckers up. >Teacher walks in. >"I was told you two were sword fighting with your brushes!!" >"Uhh...no we weren't." >"Yes you were" >"No we weren't" >"YES YOU WERE!" >She yanks them out of our hands and tells us we are going to get a blue slip (My elementary school's discipline worked on a color coded system. Yellow meant warning, Blue principal [fuckers] and red was ZOMFG. I never knew anyone who got a red slip.) >We laugh the entire way to the office while the teacher escorts us. >STILL DGAF >Talk with principal. >Calls parents. >Fucking grounded. >Gave a fuck ._. Anonymous
>Archive pl0x
Anonymous
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>>12339134 >>12339134 DO THA ARCHIVON~!!!!
Anonymous
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:C
Anonymous
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>High School >Study Hall >Nearly every day, would go to the library for study hall with bros >Would play chess >Library has a strict "no games" bullshit policy >Director who's a bitch sees us playing chess >Director: No games here >Us: But chess is a thinking gentleman's game >Director stands her ground >Threatens to kick us out >Nice library lady overhears our argument >Comes over and hears both sides of "argument" >Takes our side >Director leaves >Brofists
Anonymous
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How in the fuck did I miss this thread? Bizzump.
