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>be 15 living with just my dad.
>overweight so dad cooks healthy shit. steam vegetables p.much every night
>fucking hate pumpkin, no dog and Im a crafty cat so I line my pocket with plastic freezer bag
>wait till he finishes then put pumpkin in bag.
>Too smart to get caught and know he checks bin so I put in room and chuck it the next day omw to school, usually...
>forget it once in a drawer, hide it well so dont see. Month goes past and it starts to pong, dunno wtf the smell is.
>Mate works at a newsagent delivering papers and so he gets free porn mags and gives me some.
>Build up quite a collection, stash it all under my bed.
>Dad comes home from work, stench is almost overpowering.
>Dad is short fused ragehead, scares the shit through me when hes angry. Im studying I think when I hear "COME 'ERE!!!!!!!!!"
>"WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SMELL???!?!?" I mumble out a "idk, cant find it" as I brace for impact, . He says it cant be clothes or me that smells that bad, what am I hiding etc.
>Dad proceeds to turn room upside down looking for source of smell. Flips the bed over
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>TheHorror. Porn stash discovered, big titty women staring up at us.
> I was stunned, but i think he is more shocked than me as he's a bit of a prude and whimpers out a 'clean it up' then walks out.
Dont speak to him till the next night.
Laugh about it now but man that was so awkward.