>>1553865After months of consoling you over being treated like shit by your last guy (even though they told you this exact thing would happen), they realized that nice guys really do finish last. They also finish first, since they are the only people in the room, fondling themselves in lonely and unappreciated fashion to old episodes of Buffy. With every rejection, these nice guys became that much more jaded; and with every tear you shed, every complaint you had about how shitty Kyle the philandering boyfriend was, they began to not only care less, but realized that they wanted in on the action he was getting. You were hot, nice, and conversation with you didn't make them wonder what the insides of their veins looked like; as such, they were interested. Not just in scrumping and tossing you aside like a used Trojan, but in actually dating. But alas, you never noticed, and they evolved.
Then, that summer after your freshman year at college happened. You met up with all your old high school friends, packing a handle of Aristocrap vodka and a few cases of Pabst Blue Ribbon, and Steve, your best guy friend from high school, showed up. He told dead baby jokes, made abortion references, and was, overall, the most offensive individual in the room.
Four hours later, you fucked him incoherent.
