/r9k2/ - Robot9001 (Oct. 2011 on)

[385 / 0 / ?]

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 04:51:45 No.3414421 View View Reply Original Report

Quoted By:

ITT: stories about people who are bad with computers

>be looking at someone's computer
>obviously LOADED with viruses
>"do you have something for internet security? These sites look sketchy"
>"I just use incognito mode in google chrome, that means I don't have to worry about viruses."
>mfw

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 04:52:27 No.3414424 Report

Quoted By:

My mother uses Internet Explorer.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 04:53:19 No.3414432 Report

Quoted By:

>"I just use incognito mode in google chrome, that means I surf porn all day"

What was implied.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 04:53:21 No.3414433 Report

Quoted By: >>3427596 >>3427978

how do people even get viruses? i visit sketchy sites all the time and scan maybe once every 2 months and never get anything

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 04:55:06 No.3414451 Report

Quoted By:

>my aunt doesn't know how to copy and paste something
>I show her
>she didn't realize that you could HIGHLIGHT TEXT.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 04:59:26 No.3414499 Report

Quoted By:

>uncle calls me because his computer runs slow
>35 programs at startup
>9toolbars in internet explorer
>need to explain why this isn't good for the next 3 hours
>rage

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 06:49:21 No.3415720 Report

Quoted By: >>3416463 >>3419104 >>3425305

>Annoying kid from high school somehow got my number
>Calls me at least once a month, usually between the hours of 2 am and 6 am
>"ANON I HAVE A VIRUS"
>Ask him what's happening. Is he getting popups, internet not working, etc.
>"Well, it's.. the internet is okay, but I can't.. there's a little window thing.. internet's not... wait, the.. the window..."
>Takes about 30 minutes to decipher what the fuck he's trying to tell me
>Explain to him how to enter safemode
>"IT'S NOT WORKING"
>Ask what motherboard he has
>"HEWLETT PACKARD"
>Eventually get him in safemode
>Tell him to run the program I made him download the last time this happened
>Takes him 10 minutes to find it
>Tell him to click the "scan" button, let it do its thing, and call me back when it's done
>Hang up. He calls back an hour later
>"ANON IT'S NOT DOING ANYTHING"
>"...Did you click scan?"
>"NO, WAS I SUPPOSED TO?"

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:09:02 No.3416463 Report

Quoted By:

>>3415720
Oh dear god, what in the actual fuck?

My friends aren't great with computers, but not pants on head retarded either.

One friend has laptop (old'ish) fucking broke to hell, won't boot up, can only enter safe mode, wants me to fix it.

Tell her it's either: virus, corrupted OS, hard drive's fucked.

Get in safe mode, tell her to copy all her shit into one folder, only IMPORTANT STUFF, no bullshit.

60Gb of pictures, music (5 folders of the exact same shit that's been copied to 4 different places, one was literally duped in a new folder in the music folder) 10,000 videos, fucking SIMS saves and DLC and installation files up the ass.

Oh dear god.

Come back next day with flash drives when she finally got it down to around 35Gb, boot in safe mode, folder and files are gone, OH SHIT (temporary profile, all files deleted, didn't read the pop-up box when we started up, she's flipping shit)

>CONT.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:09:50 No.3416475 Report

Quoted By: >>3420796

>Cont.

Download Recuva and restore everything that I can (some shit got corrupted apparently, not my fucking problem)

Run some sort of windows recovery thing that was added to her computer (only time I've ever seem something like this) Basically re-installs windows without needing the installation CD or recovery disks. get all her files back onto it.

Still dunno wtf was wrong, probably her being fucking stupid and putting tons of worthless shit on it and treating her computer like a piece of shit (fucking dirty as shit, fingerprints, stains) ended up corrupting the OS or fucking up something.

Guess she is actually pretty stupid after all.

Ask her why she doesn't back up her shit. "well i tried when it started fucking up but it wanted 9 DVD's to make a disk image"

Tell her don't fucking do that, back up IMPORTANT shit on a DVD/flash drive/external drive BEFORE things get fucked up, "I don't have any money" 100 DVD's are like 25-30$ just get a set of like 5-20 and back your shit up so you won't be fucked when this inevitably happens again.

Her not understanding what counts as "important files" kinda grinds my gears

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:13:07 No.3416505 Report

Quoted By:

>Helping my mom type something for her schoolwork
>Ok now just copy and paste that part
>"I don't know that"
>Just highlight and right click
>"YOU KNOW I DONT KNOW HOW TO DO A HIGHLIGHT"
>Ma look let me show you then you'll know
>"ITS NOT MY FAULT!"
>She gets up and runs upstairs sobbing
>I wish I was making this up

It was that way for months. Shes got some serious issued that were never sorted out and its starting to take a toll on her psyche.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:13:44 No.3416509 Report

Quoted By:

This isn't nearly as bad as /g/'s stories, although its far less pretentious.

acid king mcjesus !!+H4SvAtUbDy

acid king mcjesus !!+H4SvAtUbDy Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:15:19 No.3416522 Report

Quoted By: >>3416545 >>3417393

i have a very basic understanding of computer processes, all of which i learned from google after needing to fix a few problems with my various PCs over the years

but when my friends or family have a problem they always call on me

>mfw i cant into programming or computer mechanics to even the smallest degree yet amongst my social circle i am the god of technology

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:16:51 No.3416536 Report

Quoted By: >>3417417

>step dads computer is running slow
>You fix it for free because I bought you shit when you were a kid!
>Siigghhhh fiinneee
>he brings it over
>Internet explorer
>9 toolbars
>dancing desktop buddies (I did not know these were still things)
>homepage auto directs to a holy shit you got a virus homey, give us your credit card and we'll fix your shit we're legit
>clean it all up for him
>where's mah toolbars anon? Where's my little desktop girl?
>explain they're the reason his shit gets fucked
>But I NEED those
>tell him no he really doesn't
>He gets mad at me
>know in 5 months we're going to go through this all over again and again and again until he fucks the computer for good finally

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:17:48 No.3416544 Report

Quoted By: >>3416579

>at 15 got the family computer all to myself once brother, sister, and mom got laptops
>it's pretty old, about 5, running XP
>loaded with viruses
>download scanner, wipe it clean, never visit sketchy sites and generally keep computer healthy
>3 years pass and I am going off to college, mother had gone through 2 laptops since then because each one got slow
>same with brother and sister
>after going through her third she decides to start using the old computer since I'm leaving
>first thing off "Anon what is this thing running, Vista?"
>no, it's XP
>she's shocked

cont.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:17:59 No.3416545 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416522
holy shit this so hard. I can't program or understand jack shit about things everyone else seems to get perfectly. I had farmer friends growing up and they thought I was some sort of super hacker. Felt good until I go to /g/ and ask them about building a PC and they call me fucking stupid because I can't identify parts of a computer by the alpha numerical code.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:18:04 No.3416547 Report

Quoted By:

My dad thinks that pressing the power button on the computer and the monitor will break the buttons.

My dad thought Internet explorer was a website.

My mom refers to everything as an email.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:18:47 No.3416553 Report

Quoted By:

Here are some questions I've gotten before:
>"how do I check my messages on facebook?"
>go to his facebook
>200 notifications, he's never even checked them

>"how come I can't open this picture to see?"
>trying to open in microsoft word

>"how do I save a picture on my phone?"
>"which button do I use to get back to the apps?" hint: there are two options on iPhone.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:20:25 No.3416563 Report

Quoted By: >>3416577 >>3420968 >>3422074

lol my friend just gave me his laptop to fix and he was freaking the fuck out
>downloads very seedy torrents
>downloads fake anti-virus software
>has shit loads of shit piled on shit in his laptop
>gives it to me today
>sure bra Ill take a look at it and fix it right up
>have it home today and start it up
>OS is corrupted and I cant even fucking start the thing in safe mode
>he cant find the windows installation disk
tfw I have to tell my friend to buy a new hard-drive and operating system...

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:21:10 No.3416569 Report

Quoted By:

>mother has been using computers since the 80's
>how do I watch that video?
didn't you watch the one last week?
>oh I deleted stuff because I don't use it
get media player classic
>it doesn't work, I need directx
are you fucking kidding me, get that from microsoft
done helping

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:22:05 No.3416577 Report

Quoted By: >>3416604

>>3416563
>ALL I DID WAS OPEN THIS GAME I DOWNLOADED!!!
>Skyrim.exe
>68mb

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:22:17 No.3416579 Report

Quoted By: >>3420662 >>3420985 >>3426660 >>3428697

>>3416544
>tell her it still runs well and it shouldn't be too much of a problem
>first fucking time back from college and it's already fucked
>"I guess it was just too old."
>she gets another laptop

>sister comes home as well, says she's thinking about getting a macbook air (which cost well over a thousand) because her laptop keeps getting viruses
>she later talks about how she goes to sites that let her watch movies for free AND FUCKING ADMITS THE SITE GIVES VIRUSES
>tell her that if she stops using the site then she won't have to spend all the money on a macbook
>says she really likes her movies

I don't get it. I'm not even that much a technical guy but my family just doesn't care about the well being of their computer and just end up wasting money.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:23:13 No.3416584 Report

Quoted By:

>work as IT supervisor for a remote desktop / call center
>45 minutes to get someone to type our website into their address bar because they don't know what it is
>die a little inside in 15 minute intervals
*sigh*

I'm so much more talented than this place deserves, dunno why I don't just find a new job.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:23:19 No.3416585 Report

Quoted By: >>3416594 >>3416619 >>3416620 >>3416622 >>3416648 >>3419334 >>3421003 >>3422247 >>3423995 >>3425566

>Anon quit putting these games on our computer you're giving us viruses! I deleted them. (just the shortcuts)
>it's actual boxed legit games (back when you bought games in boxes and not digitally)
>explain all these games are safe and it's them opening up every single email they get and clicking every link in them
>Don't talk back I'm an adult you're just a kid. I know best and I know its those games messing up our computer!

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:24:28 No.3416594 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416585
FUCKING THIS. When I was a kid, this was constantly what I heard.

Fuck people.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:25:46 No.3416604 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416577
exactly if you dont know how to torrent properly dont, I have never seen a computer as fucked up as his. The thing literally just went black screen on me and i gave up...

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:27:05 No.3416614 Report

Quoted By: >>3416621 >>3416645

>Visit my parents and little bro
>Notcie the internet is ridiculously slow
>Takes a minute to load google
>Ask my brother if he's downloading anything significant (poorfag country, internet is shitty a lot of the time and downloading something affects it a lot)
>He says yes, but the internet has been slow for a month
>Check his computer
>About 100 torrents of video games
>All downloaded about a month ago
>All finished but seeding
>Have been seeding for almost a month, ratio of more than 200 on most files
>"See how slow it is! I started this downloads a month ago and they aren't done yet!"
>Explain to him what seeding is
>He blames viruses
>Wat

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:27:35 No.3416619 Report

Quoted By: >>3416637 >>3416705

>>3416585
>I'm an adult and I know better
This line. This fucking line. Only demonstrates their stupidity that more than 10 years after the fact I know good and well that I knew exactly what I was talking about. I hope I don't get like this with my kids, I really do.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:27:38 No.3416620 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416585
>Stop putting so many games on the computer you're slowing down the internet!

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:27:46 No.3416621 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416614
well at least he wasnt a leech.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:27:52 No.3416622 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416585
I heard that all the time when I was on my mom's computer. Then I got my own computer and she noticed hers was still running slow and mine was really fast.
Something seemed amiss...

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:29:09 No.3416637 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416619
a fucking men

...fuck growing up in the south, i sound like a preacher

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:30:15 No.3416645 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416614
I'm curious, what country do you live in?

Not original comment my ass 4chan btw

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:30:35 No.3416648 Report

Quoted By: >>3420536

>>3416585

>All those games you installed are bogging down the computer!

I'm still mad about that. Fuck you for reminding me.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:35:20 No.3416705 Report

Quoted By: >>3421891

>>3416619
I remember as a kid thinking adults must know a shitton because they pass judgement immediately and tell you you're wrong just as fast.

Now I realize they are in fact idiots and hiding their own ignorance using their bullshit authority over you.

I live in a rural, blue collar part of the world and the adults who used to laugh at what I had to say are so far below me its like interacting with animals. HYUK BOOKS ARE FUCKING LAME HYUK AINT THAT RIGHT SON? YUP SURE IS DAD HYUK I HIT U IN THE NUTS.

Mad? I'm on the path to goddamn supervillian. Sage for rant.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Batman and Mario.jpg, 7KiB, 208x243

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:38:30 No.3416734 Report

Quoted By: >>3416807

This is me.
>Looking up mods for Minecraft see a cool one
>Press download
>Nothing happens
>Suddenly iLivid says it downloaded
>Like 3 other things download too
>Delete them and try again
>After 2 weeks of this I realize the green Download and play now buttons are ads
>Click right button
>Nothing happens when I go to play Minecraft
>Attempt to make it work for two days
>Give up doing it by myself and go to youtube
>Watch countless videos
>Do everything they say (I think I did)
>Closest I get is a black and white pic on mods and texture packs option.
>Been trying this for about a year
>yfw I still don't know how to download mods...

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:43:38 No.3416807 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416734
>>3416734
lol when i was little i had such problems downloading mods for C&C, i had to ask my grandpa how to...he stills plays that game today old techy :)

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 08:43:45 No.3416812 Report

Quoted By:

My Dad thought an underscore was called a bottom slash.
Hilarious when I heard him giving his email address (first name_surname) out to the bank over the phone.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 09:00:08 No.3416997 Report

Quoted By: >>3417306

>mom's landwhale ex-boyfriend lets me use his old mac
>no internet
>play solitaire for 30 minutes
>get bored and go to bed
>wake up at 3am, he's yelling at the computer
>says I locked him out of his admin account
>tries to reinstall OS
>doesnt work, comp doesnt boot
>he's raging so hard
>blames it all on me
>he's broken three computers
>thinks he's a computer wizard master guru
>knows shit about programming or computers in general

later
>using mom's computer
>he finds out
>tells my mom im downloading porn and fucking it up
>just watching youtube/browsing 4chan
>goes full retard, kicks us out of house
>he's admin
>tells mom to get fucked over the password
what a douchebag

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 09:01:13 No.3417006 Report

Quoted By: >>3417085 >>3419356

I break every god dn computer I own I recently broke my last one I mean fucking a I suck at technology but do any anons have any beginners tips on how to into computers?

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 09:03:28 No.3417029 Report

Quoted By: >>3422110

> computer uses TV as a monitor
> leave for a month, come back
> "Anon the computer isn't working!!"
> computers RCA cables plugged into stereo
> die

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 09:12:19 No.3417085 Report

Quoted By:

>>3417006
be careful with windows XP it might give yoiu virus

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 09:27:33 No.3417176 Report

Quoted By:

>tfw teacher thought that because I was good on computers I could type quickly
>tfw tremors

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 09:30:12 No.3417194 Report

Quoted By: >>3417430

>that feel when your family can't distinguish ads from webpage content
It kills me a little bit each time it happens.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 09:36:41 No.3417226 Report

Quoted By: >>3428766

>"How do I copy something from one hard drive to another?"
>slowly, slowly, slowly show them and repeat three times
>"find content in one hard drive. Control c. Go to the other hard drive. Control v"
>watch them struggle with it for ten minutes.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 09:46:30 No.3417306 Report

Quoted By: >>3417354

>>3416997
>goes full retard, kicks us out of house
>he's admin
>tells mom to get fucked over the password

wat

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 09:50:40 No.3417354 Report

Quoted By:

>>3417306
I lol'd when I read that... his moms ex boyfriend kicked them out of the house cause hes computer admin

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 09:50:44 No.3417355 Report

Quoted By: >>3422137

>Parents calling me because Dad constantly gets viruses
>Having to pirate books for my mother because she doesn't understand how

Viking !!Lm1hqAqF0MP

Viking !!Lm1hqAqF0MP Tue 14 Aug 2012 09:55:25 No.3417393 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416522
Man, are you me? I've had some problems with my laptop, and also from just douching around in high school with friends, I've learned how to do some shit on a computer, but I really don't know all that much. But everyone in my family seems to think I know everything about a goddamn computer,

Viking !!Lm1hqAqF0MP

Viking !!Lm1hqAqF0MP Tue 14 Aug 2012 09:56:55 No.3417417 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416536
>>homepage auto directs to a holy shit you got a virus homey, give us your credit card and we'll fix your shit we're legit

Ha, I've gotten that one before. Happened when I deepwebed without antivirus or anything. I had to reset my harddrive because I didn't want to spend $100 to get it fixed.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 09:57:43 No.3417430 Report

Quoted By: >>3424475

>>3417194
>dad: "son my computers all dicked up I need you to fix it, I'll give you $50"
>he's clicked on some fake virus scan ad and downloaded malware
>fix it in five minutes
>easy $50

sometimes parents riding the PC retard rollercoaster like it is Mr. Bones' Wild Ride isn't so bad.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 10:01:00 No.3417465 Report

Quoted By: >>3417568 >>3417591 >>3419256 >>3431230

>I'm in CIS
>Bro is in web design
>I decided to learn HTML so I could try force myself to get used to Java since I'm only doing C++
>Make a pretty kickass page that utilizes the canvas to detect the mouse along a grid and select pictures and move within menus.
>Basically Flash without flash
>Make a few other webpages to toy with various browsers and how they can handle intense calculations
>Web design bro wants to team up
>He wants to make a "webstie like..the naruto forums..and maybe on the side play Gears of War in browser"
>For my sanity I try to see if he means a 2D variation of Gears (which could probably be done in Flash)
>No, he means let's have gears of war, the xbox360 exclusive running in browser alongside the forums, which he has no idea how to setup or even that you can just grab proboards/vbulletin/some bullshit
>He's set to graduate in a few years

This is my future, these are the people I will be working with

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 10:10:58 No.3417568 Report

Quoted By: >>3417587

>>3417465
Ue3 is getting a browser based version sooo...

Viking !!Lm1hqAqF0MP

Viking !!Lm1hqAqF0MP Tue 14 Aug 2012 10:11:17 No.3417574 Report

Quoted By: >>3419096

You know what's funny? Fucking with people that are clueless to computers. I'd do this to people in highschool
>make their desktop background and image of their desktop, then delete all the icons and hide the toolbar
They'll flip shit when they can't do anything
>change the auto correct options in word to change common words into something else
The teacher got really confused when a girl turned in a paper that kept saying "sausage" how the girl never noticed this while she was typing still beats me
>make a simple virus.exe that infinitely opens up the command prompt
That was one of my favorites, I'd pass around "games" to people. I had a plan to make one that deleted everyone's user files that had their work saved, but I never got to it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 10:13:00 No.3417587 Report

Quoted By: >>3417613

>>3417568

Really? I didn't know that

After seeing quake live I can imagine it happening, but still, even if we did work on it, we'd have to code and animate all that shit ourselves.

If they do a straight port our job is done, but still...I mad

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 10:13:32 No.3417591 Report

Quoted By:

>>3417465
Check your privilege you CIS scum

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 10:15:39 No.3417613 Report

Quoted By:

>>3417587
It'll probably be as watered down as the iOS version
I WANT MAH TERRAINS

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 13:41:24 No.3418977 Report

Quoted By:

>Friend brings his laptop up to me during class
>Says his WoW account got hacked and he thinks he has a keylogger
>Wants to know how long the scan will take to find it
>Look at his screen
>He's running a search in C:/ for "keylogger"

>Girlfriend's parents are having computer problems
>Her mom's laptop has a virus giving her "You're infected!" popups
>Her dad's desktop is overheating
>I can't go over to help, so I just tell my girlfriend to run MBAM on the laptop
>Her mom says she heard about MBAM on the TV and that it's another virus and refuses to let her download it
>Whatever, explain to her that her dad's case is probably full of dust
>Tell her to unscrew the side and then clean out the inside with condensed air + microfiber rags
>Her dad flips his shit when she takes the side off and tells her she broke it
>Tell them I can come fix it in 2 days (when my final exams were over)
>They take it to a computer repair shop and end up paying over $400, don't get their computers back for 2 weeks either

>Had to share a desktop with my brother when I was young
>He insisted on having separate accounts
>Okay, whatever
>Computer is slow as hell
>He eventually buys a laptop and I get the desktop to myself
>Figure out how to take the password off his account
>He has shitloads of weird programs with Russian names, think they might have been emulators
>Toolbars everywhere
>Sketchy Zelda porn sites bookmarked
>Program called "Home Keylogger" on the start menu

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 13:50:27 No.3419020 Report

Quoted By: >>3420507

>brother wants to install a Minecraft mod
>he's on the computer and i'm standing next to him
>have no idea how to install a Minecraft mod because i've never done it before, tell brother to open up google and copy paste the errors
>tells me he doesn't know how to do that
>"What? You know how to copy paste you do it all the time. Copy this line right here and paste it into google search. Someones bound to have had this problem before."
>"I told you I don't know how to do it!"
>"I just told you how to do it."
>he rolls his eyes and opens up the Minecraft again, showing me the error
>"I just need you to fix this."
>"I'm telling you how to fix this right now. Copy paste it into Google."
>"YOU JUST DON'T GET IT, I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOOD WITH COMPUTERS AND COULD HELP BUT I GUESS NOT."
>"I just told you how to fix it."
>he stops talking to me
>he hasn't played Minecraft in over a week

I think he's afraid of Google.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 13:50:32 No.3419021 Report

Quoted By:

Shit like this makes me so thankful that my parents are computer-literate.

My dad knows more about computers than I do, and I successfully (and easily) taught my mom how to torrent, use Chrome, and run frequent virus scans and CCleaner.

That being said, here's a story about mom's coworker, from my mom's point of view:
>coworker printing document
>asks how to enlarge the print
>show him how
>he prints it at 400%
>still not big enough, apparently
>ask him why he wants to enlarge it
>"because the file on my computer isn't big enough to read on the screen"
>what? the pdf is too small to read?
>"yeah, that's why I'm printing it bigger"
>you know you can zoom in on the computer right
>"what?"
>show him how
>he leaves the room a few minutes later
>glance at boss, who was watching the whole thing
>he has his face in his hands, shaking from suppressed laughter

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 13:59:58 No.3419052 Report

Quoted By: >>3422170

>Be a lucky guy (that guy who finds 50's on the sidewalk)
>Somehow get a sweet job as IT support even though I'm pretty much clueless with computers
>Get sent to site to fix some shit
>Make up some shit about it being something wrong with the servers and I'll go fix it in the office
>Tell the other IT guy who is a fucking genius autist who loves fixing everything
>He hates talking to anyone so I'll always be the one who gets all the credit
>My face when I got promoted above him and he didn't even care

Oh man, I still don't know even know html or how to crop an image

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1978524184606.jpg, 61KiB, 470x400

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:00:26 No.3419054 Report

Quoted By: >>3419692

>tfw 4 microsoft IT certifications
>tfw no one can question your authoritah on any computer related problem

feels good man

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:03:29 No.3419067 Report

Quoted By: >>3419075

My dad works at IT for a major international bank. When he wants to change the source on the TV (say he's on HDMI 3 and wants to get to HDMI 1), instead of pressing the source button once, and the up arrow twice, he'd rather press the source button six times, going through TV, External and many others. I've explained to him multiple times that he can do it faster, he just doesn't listen. I just don't get how someone who's so good at IT can be so technologically retarded concerning other devices.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:06:05 No.3419075 Report

Quoted By: >>3419137

>>3419067
You are the one who is retarded, pushing one button six times is much easier than manoeuvring around the remote

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:06:30 No.3419076 Report

Quoted By: >>3419112

>tfw working as an IT help person is probably the easiest job i've ever had

it takes basically no complex knowledge and everyone thinks i'm a fucking wizard

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:09:36 No.3419096 Report

Quoted By:

>>3417574
once when i was studying IT i changed the desktop background of every computer to the standard windows XP background with the start menu open

t'was fun

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:10:53 No.3419104 Report

Quoted By:

>>3415720
>"NO, WAS I SUPPOSED TO?"
My fucking sides.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:12:34 No.3419112 Report

Quoted By: >>3419132

>>3419076
this is so true, only the retards with easy to solve problems call IT help.

anyone who knows shit with legitimate problems would never call IT help, they'd solve it themselves

>worked IT help desk for 4 years
>most serious problem i had to deal with was someone who didnt realise their fan had clogged and the pc burst into flames mid call
>all my lol

AntiStatist !VoonmBZbSs

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Iherdulieknorton.jpg, 31KiB, 506x337

AntiStatist !VoonmBZbSs Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:15:04 No.3419131 Report

Quoted By:

dat feel when norton

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:15:31 No.3419132 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419112
The only things you need to know are a few basic terms and how to google

I remember a few years ago when i did work experience i was very surprised that almost all the IT technicians did was google the problem

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:16:51 No.3419137 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419075
Except it really isn't. The two buttons are right next to each other. It takes no time at all to switch between the two.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:18:31 No.3419146 Report

Quoted By:

>old man brings his computer in to get fixed
>porn on the desktop, pictures of his wife in the my documents folder

god damn it people

although when 18 year old women do the same thing it's pretty damn awesome

i go through all of your private shit

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1334802517565.jpg, 47KiB, 358x457

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:18:31 No.3419147 Report

Quoted By: >>3419150 >>3419151 >>3419155

>visiting parents
>notice their computer is running a little slowly
>download ccleaner for a temporary fix
>3 or 4 months later
>visiting parents again
>notice they have a new computer
>I say "Oh, you guys got a new computer?"
>dad says "YES, AND IT'S BECAUSE OF YOU, ANON."
>"Why me?"
>"YOU DOWNLOADED ALL THOSE FUCKING VIRUSES AND IT CRASHED"
>mfw he tells me this

grime

grime Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:19:45 No.3419150 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419147
I know that feel.... I know that feel too well.

knowthatfeelblox

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:19:51 No.3419151 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419147
i know that feel

"Ever since you downloaded that Firefox the computer has been running slowly"

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:20:47 No.3419155 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419147
I swear it makes me homicidal when people say shit like that. Its just so fucking infuriating.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:33:25 No.3419209 Report

Quoted By: >>3424239 >>3428853

This just happened like 2 weeks ago

>be with my cousins (we'll name them A, B, and C)
>and my cousin's cousin (his name was Joe)
>Cousins are completely illiterate with computers, Joe is not
>Cousin A has a 10 year old laptop that he got from his parents
>I quickly look at the overview of the specs
>laugh at it's 1.5 GB RAM
>laugh at it's <1 GHz processor
>say "Hey Joe will this thing run Battlefield 3 at max settings?"
>everyone laughs
>cousin A says (while laughing) "I really don't understand what you guys are saying right now"
>cousins A and B say "yeah me neither"

Why do people laugh, and then SAY they didn't get the joke? I understand laughing even though you didn't get it, but admitting it just makes you look like a retard.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:34:36 No.3419215 Report

Quoted By:

>Boss at work
>Tell him to open his web browser
>????
>Point at firefox icon
>"Oh you mean google".

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 14:44:34 No.3419256 Report

Quoted By: >>3424369

>>3417465

>Implying xbox executables aren't in PPC
>Implying macs dont have a PPC processor
>Implying you couldn't use the wealth of information on mac executables to make an emulator
>Implying implications

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 15:02:10 No.3419334 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416585
>Don't talk back I'm an adult you're just a kid. I know best and I know its those games messing up our computer!

Oh god I fucking hate that. Why are you so embarrassed that I know something you don't know?
Fucking cuntnugget. Don't ask me for help if you don't want it.
>"NO I want to do that alone I want to learn"
Too bad you haven't learned it in the 20 times we did before.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 15:05:35 No.3419349 Report

Quoted By:

>technologically functional sister
>tech savvy dad
>mom that can't into comptuers and knows to stay away because of it
>most of my friends either fit into the above or are wizards

I feel so sorry for all of you

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 15:06:54 No.3419356 Report

Quoted By: >>3431361

>>3417006
delete system32 folder. It really slows down PC while giving zero in return. Microsoft just threw some boot files that are never used. Trust me.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 15:10:30 No.3419377 Report

Quoted By:

>Working as an engineer
>My manager has a trouble with his email client at home
>I resolve his problem
>I explain him the principle of an email client
>Tell him it download the emails on his harddrive
>"No, that's wrong! Where would be the database in this case?"
>Couldn't help laughing

Those business guys are funny when they are trying to show that they're clever.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 15:19:38 No.3419438 Report

Quoted By:

Moar

Blogjdejebevdbdbaidsblox

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1343874981670.jpg, 55KiB, 500x333

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 15:26:19 No.3419475 Report

Quoted By: >>3420013

Literally two minutes ago:

>Dad rings. THE TEXT IS SMALL AND I CANT READ IT ANYMORE
>Sounds like you changed the text size
>NO I DIDNT I DIDNT DO ANYTHING
>Hold control and scroll the mouse wheel
>HEY! THE TEXT IS BIG AGAIN!
>Yeah, you changed the text size
>NO I DIDNT! I DIDNT TOUCH IT IT JUST WENT LIKE THAT

>mfw

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 15:31:35 No.3419506 Report

Quoted By:

>Guy doesn't know how to cut...
>He also didn't know how to use a stapler giving it girly slaps
>I just press on it, and it's done

That he knew how to cut was important because we were out of time for something school related.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1301600626407.jpg, 19KiB, 247x231

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 15:57:19 No.3419639 Report

Quoted By:

>Mum wants to know how to do something on the computer
>Go with her into the room where her computer is
>It's off
>"How do I turn it on, anon?"
>She's been using a computer every day at work for about 6 years
>"It's always on when I get there..."
>mfw

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 16:05:16 No.3419675 Report

Quoted By: >>3421765 >>3429007

>last day working as an IT help desk guy
>last call
>some guy is having problems with his sound
>judging by what he said, it seems he just muted everything
>i tell him to delete all his audio drivers and call back the next day if he still has a problem

i wonder what happened

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 16:07:47 No.3419692 Report

Quoted By: >>3419728

>>3419054

all your knowledge is worth shit in the current computer paradigm.

The best you will be able to do is supporting the failing OS of users who made the bad choice.
Enjoy !

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 16:12:48 No.3419728 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419692
I demand you return to your grave, Steve Jobs!

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 16:26:06 No.3419813 Report

Quoted By: >>3419826 >>3420185

>visit tube porn sites
>visit torrent sites
>click random shit all day every day
>only time I ever had a virus was virut from my friends USB stick

I don't even know how people manage to get viruses.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1336347180471.jpg, 25KiB, 695x473

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 16:28:47 No.3419822 Report

Quoted By:

>dad doesn't know how to create file folders
>his My Pictures folder is just that- one folder with 1000+ pics
>needs me to show him how to create files (right click, Create New etc)
>still needs me to show him how to copy photos from his memory card
>thought Internet Explorer was his homepage
>plugged his USB printer in to the internet cable jack, was screaming because his work files wouldn't print
he just doesn't want to learn

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 16:29:38 No.3419826 Report

Quoted By: >>3419967 >>3424407

>>3419813
>that feel when demonoid is gone now

also, i've never had a serious virus either

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO pdf word.jpg, 272KiB, 651x1921

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 16:36:51 No.3419859 Report

Quoted By: >>3419868

picture highly related

i don't get how people can get so mad retarded, yo
people should be forced to do some sort of basic course to qualify them to buy a pc

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 16:39:12 No.3419868 Report

Quoted By: >>3419889 >>3419903 >>3419974

>>3419859
Please delete that picture so the thread doesn't derail.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 16:44:17 No.3419889 Report

Quoted By: >>3419974

>>3419868
Too late, it's happening.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 16:47:16 No.3419903 Report

Quoted By: >>3419974

>>3419868
le le le le le le le le le le le

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 16:54:48 No.3419938 Report

Quoted By: >>3425743

>sister's boyfriend doesn't understand why their laptop is so slow
>they've somehow made their facebook machine run at a snail's pace
>check browser history
>so much bbw porn
>sister is skinny as fuck
>neither of them knew the browser saves your history
>all that butthurt
>browser history is now always mysteriously empty

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 16:57:00 No.3419954 Report

Quoted By: >>3419972

>Getting wireless internet at home for the first time
>Mom is semi-knowledgeable of computers because of her job so she's setting it up and doesn't even need help from me, everything's going fine
>Yay! Interwebz!
>She opens up browser for the first time
>It's Internet Explorer. Cringe but it's her shit, whatever
>ISP website automatically set to home page upon opening
>Inevitable message warning that website is trying to change the homepage
>Tell her it's won't hurt anything, she can change homepage later if she really wants
>"I don't know I think I'll call them to make sure"
>"No seriously you just need to click right there and it will go away and it will be fine"
>She picks up the phone and calls the ISP
>Bitch on the other end has no idea what she is talking about, tells her some overcomplicated shit that makes no sense
>Doesn't work. Fancy that.
>Tells her to do the same thing I told her in the first place
>"Ok that worked! Thank you so much!" *click*
I'll never understand how my mother can deal with hardware flawlessly but then when she's actually operating a computer outside of Microsoft Excel everything goes to hell.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 16:58:57 No.3419967 Report

Quoted By: >>3424407

>>3419826
I gave my uncle a LONG ass talking to for using demonoid on my connection. I wasn't concerned about viruses, he can put any garbage he wants on his hp mini piece of shit, but I don't use public torrent sites in my house, and I'll never allow anyone else to do it.

At first he didn't like me trying to boss him around etc and we had a long standing disagreement over it, but he finally learned to see my way and he's now an active member of torrentleech.org as well.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 16:59:08 No.3419970 Report

Quoted By:

>i was like 10 years old and didn't know shit about pcs
>did retarded shit, couldn't even figure out how to install games
>always asked people who didn't know shit
>bought games that wouldn't run on my specs because i didn't know better
>somehow i figure shit out with the help of google and basic knowledge/reading comprehension
>now i can do all that shit on my own basically thought myself everything i know
>can fix, build computers, basic programming, all that shit

why can't people do the same?

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 16:59:23 No.3419972 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419954
Another, Too long to do both at once. This one didn't happen to me exactly, but I had to sit there and watch the whole thing play out
>Friend having problems with computer running slowly
>Friend's mom uses it for work she wants something done about it
>Has another friend who is a wizard look at it
>He Fixes it, whatever "it" was, maybe a virus I don't remember
>Friend's mom checks it out, says it's better
>A couple days later she's raising hell about how it's slow again, blames the guy that fixed it before
>She calls his dad (also a wizard)
>She smokes like crazy, sits at the computer smoking every time she uses it
>What's more, the system unit is on top of the desk to the left of the monitor, so she holds her cigarette on that side
>He says the fan must be getting clogged from her smoking
>"NO NO THAT ISN'T IT THAT CAN'T BE IT! HE SCREWED UP THE COMPUTER!"
>I cry on the inside for both of them.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 16:59:46 No.3419974 Report

Quoted By: >>3419981 >>3420361

>>3419903
>>3419889
>>3419868
Wait. 4chan gets mad over simple rage comics now? I just thought they got mad over the use of 'le' all the time.

We invented fucking rage comics.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:01:22 No.3419981 Report

Quoted By: >>3419987 >>3420034

>>3419974
We invented a lot of memes that we don't use anymore. The rage comics we invented go hand in hand with that le shit we didn't. It's out of style.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:03:31 No.3419987 Report

Quoted By: >>3420016 >>3420017

>>3419981
So when I was gone you people let reddit/9fag steal ragecomics?

Pathetic, 4chan.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1276178843046.jpg, 14KiB, 172x244

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:12:04 No.3420013 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419475
Same thing with my mother.

>my facebook is small now
>wut?
>my facebook. it's too small to read now what is wrong?
>ctrl+0
>there you go
>hfw

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:12:31 No.3420016 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419987
we simply stepped up to other forms of conveying our rage. We evolve, we are one step beyond.
It's like they are still trying to squeeze maximum watts out of coal tech that they copied while we stepped up to nuclear tech.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:12:37 No.3420017 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419987
Trust me, after you see what they've done with them you'll be sorry you ever thought that shit was cool.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:17:03 No.3420030 Report

Quoted By: >>3420097

>working in office
>60 year old female coworker often gets pictures of products with tons of unused white space
>show her how to cut off the white part so that you only see the product, no problem
>Now have to do it 4 times a day for months because she somehow forgets the 10-second-procedure every 2 hours

HOW

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:17:29 No.3420034 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419981
Those are not ragecomics. Those are festering abortions that butchered a simple formula and jammed it full of "xd funny faces lul" for the sake of it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:22:22 No.3420048 Report

Quoted By: >>3420103

This isn't a story about people being bad at computers per say (thou it does include a case of someone being just that and not realizing it), but a case of being treated like crap when trying to help (sort of "No good deed goes unpunished"):
>Mother's laptop is fucked (again) with viruses and crap as she uses IE and even demanded me to uninstall Firefox (this was back in the days of IE6)
>Tell her it's fucked and needs a reformat
>She argues with me that she should be able to do it herself
>Tell her "Sure, you do that. Shout for me when you need me to come do it" and start leaving
>Stops me and demands that I tell her how to
>She tries to do this for the rest of the day and finally gives up at 1AM after installing another copy of Windows on the same partition
>She finally comes over to my room with the laptop and asks me to fix it
>I tell her I'll get on it the next day as I'm already on my way to bed
To be continued...

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:25:18 No.3420065 Report

Quoted By:

>have no real idea how computers work, never had a IT job or education
>Everyone asks me to fix their computer stuff
>Expect me to know every problem and computer program EVER
>just google the problem and read the first 2 or 3 hits
>Problem solved in 99% of all cases
>"Anon you are so good with computers"
>That 1% when Google doesnt help
>"oh Anon I thought you were good at these things"

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:33:32 No.3420097 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420030

Alzheimer is an awful thing.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1324385985122.gif, 1MiB, 236x224

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:33:43 No.3420098 Report

Quoted By: >>3420589

>girl gives me a call and tells me that the internet doesn't work
>try my best to go through every possible scenario
>i'm like fuck it can't do this shit over phone as it's obviously hardware related
>say i could come over
>(i think) she says ok but now is a bad time
>i say ok, just say when you need help or something along those lines
>few days later she texts me that her dad got it to some shop

>tfw
>mfw they could've gotten it for free but refused for being cunts

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:34:56 No.3420103 Report

Quoted By: >>3420188

>>3420048
>Get up the next day and get working on it
>Survey the damage and conclude that I need to format the HDD and install Windows from scratch
>Backup data and get cracking on it
>Slow as shit laptop IDE HDD and CD/DVD drive so the install takes forever
>Finally completes and I get started copying over backuped files, installing drivers, programs
>Due to this being christmas eve's eve and living in europe we're busy with last minute christmas preparations (in northern Europe it's tradition that Santa Claus comes to personally deliver gifts on the evening of Christmas eve)
>Because of this I don't have the time to finish up everything, so I inform my mother as well as tell her not to touch the laptop just yet
>Get woken up on Christmas eve by mother who storms into my room and starts yelling at me that she can't check her dial-up email on her laptop (yes, the laptop I told her not to touch just yet)
>Remind her I told her not to toch it
>Tells me to fix it and pretty much throws it at me while I'm lying in bed
>Start installing the last stuff
>Get interrupted by mother asking why I'm not dressed
>Tell her I'm finishing up her laptop like she just told me
>Tells me to put it aside, get out of bed and help with Christmas related choirs
>Angry at me for the rest of the day
>Finally get the time to finish up what I started on Christmas day
>She's still pissed at me
The most annoying thing about it is that to this day she doesn't think she did anything wrong...

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:46:24 No.3420156 Report

Quoted By: >>3420172 >>3422622

About 5 years ago, I had this know it all teacher trying to teach me video production
>He tells me I have to delete my icons on my desktop because I have too many and they slow down your pc.
mfw

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:49:53 No.3420172 Report

Quoted By: >>3420210

>>3420156
having icons on your desktop is a stupid thing to do anyway

it looks ugly

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:52:08 No.3420185 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419813
>Clicking on the fake download links on torrent sites
>Downloading album.exe
>I won a free phone from being the 1 millionth visitor!
>Norton

That's how.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:53:27 No.3420188 Report

Quoted By: >>3420244

>>3420103
dumb bitch. You probably got spanked at your childhood for no reason. She must be one of these frustrated women that always expect anything they don't understand work like oiled doldo in hands of someone with +1% comprehension.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:57:00 No.3420210 Report

Quoted By: >>3420218 >>3424836

>>3420172
>2012
>not changing your default icons to custom made ones that you like

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 17:58:43 No.3420218 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420210
>2012
>having icons at all

just don't

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:03:23 No.3420244 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420188
She never tried to physically discipline me, my dad did that and she hated it, but she did have a tendency to give out punishments that were out of proportion for the most ridiculous things. One example was when I lost a sock (yes, a SOCK) at gym class and she yelled at me as well as grounded me without TV and videogame privileges for a month. Another time she took away my videogame console for 6 months just to see if my average grades would improve (as you can guess I found other ways to entertain myself and they didn't, so she gave back my console).

Nowdays she's moved on to being an insane controlfreak who until a few months ago used to call me daily to keep close tabs on the details of my studies and my social life (she still does that, but "only" calls me 3-4 times a week). I blame the fact she's a miserable work-a-holic with LITERALLY no hobbies and who secretly hates most of her siblings.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:04:04 No.3420250 Report

Quoted By:

>successfully taught both parents to cut and paste
>successfully taught both parents how to avoid viruses and scams
>successfully trained both parents on both Windows and OS X
>successfully made mom and dad self sufficient 95% of the time on their computers

Since my job is in IT, it makes my life easier knowing I won't have to deal with their retardedness on top of the shit I deal with at work.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:18:03 No.3420361 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419974

The piece of shit you posted is not a rage comic, it looks like its straight out of fucking reddit.

You didn't even draw anything yourself you fucking cancerous niggershit

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:24:59 No.3420401 Report

Quoted By:

basically it's always the same scenario.

>Anon the computer doesn't work for some reason
>Fix it
>it breaks again because they use it like fucking monkeys
>Anon, the computer doesn't work because of you

Fucking shit

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:32:56 No.3420448 Report

Quoted By: >>3420456 >>3422005 >>3424186

>"Son, your the games you are buying are viruses! You need to remove them"
>"But Mom! My Sister has Napster and Limewire installed on the computer, and she constantly downloads viruses disguised as music! I bought these games from Best Buy, they are not infected with anything!"
>"No anon, Music cannot have viruses, only games can."
She took the computer to Best Buy, and the employees told her the same thing after they fixed it. She ignored them and just banned me from using the family computer for two years, because my Mom always needs someone to blame except for my sister.

I eventually saved up enough money to buy a near-mint condition Thinkpad, that had a broken Windows installation. I just installed Debian (Linux distro) and called it a day.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:33:34 No.3420456 Report

>>3420448
[CONT]
>Sister continues to use Limewire to download viruses, since she cannot tell the difference between a 5kb exe and a 5mb mp3
>While I am at school (she is supposedly sick), she takes my laptop and tries to use it for her various online activities, and quickly discovers it is impossible to install Windows programs natively on it.
>She talks to my Mom and tells her that I broke my computer, and that I was probably too embarrassed to fix it
>They go to Best Buy and have a fellow install Windows on it, along with every junk program on this side of the galaxy
>They wiped all of school assignments and notes in the process, even the ones I was working on, AND EVEN THE FUCKING FAT16 PARTITION THAT WAS NAMED "BACKUP - DO NOT WIPE"
>By the time I arrive home my sister has managed to fuck it up with more viruses than a two-bit whore
>My Mom tells me that the laptop is now my sister's property, since "I cannot be trusted with computers"
>"But Mom, I bought it with my own money from the jobs I did last Summer. Whether I can use it 'well' is irrelevant"
>She tells me that if it wasn't for her status as a local pharmacist I would have never had the jobs, so it was her money anyway
>mfw only half the people I worked for knew her name
And that /r9k/, is how I became known as the computer illiterate of my family

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1338872121021.jpg, 28KiB, 432x346

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:37:26 No.3420493 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
Perfectly. Calm.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:38:19 No.3420500 Report

Quoted By:

>My sister comes back from uni
>All of a sudden the internet is fucked to shit
>While shes not looking at the laptop i take a look at her computer
>"OH, She has Utorrent, maybe she's torrenting", better check - 0 torrents downloading - 35 torrents Seeding. Stop them all
>Wait this computer is new, how is it so slow
>Open my computer - C: 5GB out of 1TB free
>Go talk to her about how she needs to delete some stuff because her computer will break down if its constantly full
>She flips shit
>2 weeks later shes complaining because her laptop won't work because the hard drive's fucked.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:38:54 No.3420505 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
Son, I feel disgusted by your retarded family ...

Viking !!Lm1hqAqF0MP

Viking !!Lm1hqAqF0MP Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:39:07 No.3420507 Report

Quoted By: >>3424620

>>3419020
He's probably afraid of the porn searches that will come up if he types anything into Google.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1344309378480.jpg, 8KiB, 259x194

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:42:26 No.3420529 Report

Quoted By: >>3420554 >>3420598

>>3420456
>>3420456
>>3420456
Why didn't you just take it back and put a lock on it you fucking pussy.
10/10 I got so fucking mad

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:42:53 No.3420535 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
I'd like to introduce your moms face to my fist.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:43:07 No.3420536 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416648
>>3416648
>>3416648

I heard it too. Just ran outside and told my mother that, and she looks at me and without blinking, says

>I guess they were running the same games you were, anon!

Fucking smartass.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:43:31 No.3420539 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
Jimmies are beyond rustled by this story. Beyond rustled.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:43:32 No.3420540 Report

Quoted By: >>3420632

>>3420456
.......now I understand why child abuse charge can be registered from a child towards his parents.
But limewire? Is that hole still active? or that means the atrocity took time long ago?

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:44:33 No.3420552 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456

THEY WIPED YOUR MOTHERFUCKING HARD DRIVE

AND STOLE YOUR PROPERTY YOU PAID FOR WITH THE LABOR OF YOUR OWN BROW

I WOULD HAVE CALLED THE COPS ON THAT FUCKING WHORE

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:44:48 No.3420554 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420529
you think with such etalon retards this will work? He will just be told not to download and hide pron.

Viking !!Lm1hqAqF0MP

Viking !!Lm1hqAqF0MP Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:51:15 No.3420589 Report

Quoted By: >>3420603

>>3420098
What do you think that guy thinks of being a widely used gif on here?

Assuming he knows about it?

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:51:50 No.3420598 Report

Quoted By: >>3422005 >>3422265 >>3424186 >>3426436 >>3429390

>>3420529
I did, though I locked it in a locked chest instead of putting a lock on it.
Of course my Sister though a hissy-fit, and my Mom responded by taking some of my CDs to "see how I feel when someone takes my stuff."
They somehow ended up broken (including a backup disk of my sister's data), but I still refused to hand over my laptop because fuck the police, I value my computer more than any other of my possessions (besides memorabilia).

My Mom just called a locksmith and got the computer out of the chest and gave it back to my sister, who raged because I had reinstalled debian and apparently deleted her information without backing it up. Being the calm, cool, rational being she was, she through the laptop outside during her fit of rage, and it fell in a puddle while running.

I did not mention it earlier because this part is just retarded, not entertaining in the least.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:52:41 No.3420603 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420589
he looks like someone who will understand.

Viking !!Lm1hqAqF0MP

Viking !!Lm1hqAqF0MP Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:55:52 No.3420628 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
I would have beaten the fuck out of both of them for deleting my shit.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 18:56:27 No.3420632 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420540
She also used Napster, for reference, and my Thinkpad could barely run Windows XP.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 19:00:52 No.3420662 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416579
Just fucking torrent then.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 19:03:14 No.3420679 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
Make sure your mother dies in a shady nursing home after years of abuse and your sister is gang raped by niggers.

It's the only way. You know this to be true.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 19:03:20 No.3420681 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456

Oh my fuck, shit, I can't, holy god. What in the fucking name of something that can't measure up to this...

No, just kill them. Please, for me.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 19:12:20 No.3420743 Report

Quoted By:

>tfw both my parents were programmers and are still more knowledgable about computers than me

>>3420456
My jimmies have entered rustlehood

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 19:14:40 No.3420760 Report

Quoted By:

All these retarded parents stories make me glad my mother always admitted she was clueless when it came to computers and calmly asked me to explain when she didn't understand something about the PC. She let me take care of maintenance and I took care of every problem we had.

However, my brother was a retarded cunt who fucked up the same computer twice because of "TOTALLY FREE MUSIC DOWNLOADS!!!" and shady pornsites.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 19:20:00 No.3420796 Report

Quoted By: >>3422094

>>3416475
>Run some sort of windows recovery thing that was added to her computer
>(only time I've ever seem something like this)
>only time

And you're saying *she's* the one who's bad with computers?

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 19:25:19 No.3420834 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
JIMMIES RUSTLED
Post your address I will seriously drive over there and murder your family for you

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO ch-01.png, 8KiB, 320x240

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 19:31:10 No.3420858 Report

Quoted By:

Bring forth intellectual discussion!

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 19:44:03 No.3420947 Report

Quoted By:

>this thread is filled with computer retards
>I'm genuinely getting annoyed at how some people here don't seem to think they're a retard

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 19:46:18 No.3420968 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416563
fucking go to a torrent site and download a copy of windows oh my jesus why does he need to buy a new hard drive what the fuck is wrong with you

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 19:48:19 No.3420985 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416579
I use streaming sites all the fucking time and don't get viruses. I seriously don't understand how anyone can get a virus nowadays, it's not hard to notice when soemone's trying to trick you.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 19:50:28 No.3421003 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416585
this is the story of everyone's life

now I'm twenty, can program, have my own shit etc and their stuff still gets viruses I'm just like, yeah. well. guess it was you all along then wasn't it.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1342128248301.jpg, 87KiB, 425x640

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 20:44:51 No.3421440 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456

I think we all need to have a happy /r9k/ get together and murder your family in a slow, agonizing way.

Jesus fucking Christ i have never raged like this before.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 20:48:55 No.3421475 Report

Quoted By:

>Ctrl+F
>">>>/g/"
>Phrase not found
>>>/g/

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 20:54:26 No.3421516 Report

Quoted By:

my dad still uses his computer from 1993

>has no speakers
>no mouse
>no internet
>he can barely type with two fingers even though he's been using the thing for 20 years
>always asks about www.com and who puts all of the information in google

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 20:59:13 No.3421560 Report

Quoted By:

Moar

Boonndodebloxksjebsblox.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 21:15:05 No.3421697 Report

Quoted By: >>3421747

my mom freaked out at me once because i was sending friend invities to a bunch of random youtube people
>anon, you're gonna get viruses from all those people

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 21:20:05 No.3421747 Report

Quoted By:

>>3421697
Oh god.

My nan went batshit when o was using skype on her computer - she said she saw that skype has viruses on the news.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 21:22:03 No.3421765 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419675
Couldn't help but laugh
This was glorious

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 21:36:48 No.3421891 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416705
I guess I'm lucky to have had parents that actually admitted when I proved them wrong. happened rarely tho

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 21:41:20 No.3421929 Report

Quoted By: >>3422056 >>3422294

>Some kid complains to me that he has a virus, demands that I do it for free
>Install Gentoo, virus gone
This happened sometime in 2011, and he STILL hasn't figured out how to install Windows.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 21:51:10 No.3422005 Report

Quoted By: >>3422192

>>3420448
>>3420456
>>3420598
This deserves it's own thread, jimmies danger gauge scores way too high.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 21:55:28 No.3422056 Report

Quoted By:

>>3421929
hahaha, after all this rage a joke like this is what we need.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 21:58:08 No.3422074 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416563
>buy a new hard drive
dude, just wipe it + re-install windows (which is easy as fuck to pirate)
then re-install drivers
install MSE
bam.
new computer

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 21:59:03 No.3422082 Report

Quoted By: >>3422303

>On moms netbook
>For folder on desktop called "stuff"
>OH GEE I WONDER WHAT THIS IS
>WHAT? PORN? I WOULD NEVER HAVE GUESSED!

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 21:59:48 No.3422094 Report

Quoted By: >>3422128

>>3420796
>And you're saying *she's* the one who's bad with computers?

It was some HP recovery thing put on the computer, only time I dealt with an HP computer.

implying I'm the one who's bad with computers.... I don't even...

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:01:34 No.3422104 Report

Quoted By: >>3422133 >>3422150

My fucking nana
>really wants to give computers a try
>gets to a rudimentary level with XP
>I take her to the computer store and stop the sales guys ripping her off
>set up her new PC
>it runs Win7
>it's like all previous knowledge has completely been erased, she cannot comprehend how the majority of the things she knows how to do are exactly the same, just with a shinier interface
>spend 45 minutes explaining how to copy and paste
>she writes down instructions explicitly on post-it notes
>"press the right hand button at the top of the mouse. move the mouse so the arrow on the screen moves onto copy. when copy is blue, press the left hand button on the mouse WITHOUT MOVING THE MOUSE ITSELF"
>her desk is PLASTERED in post-its
>all she does is play farmville and send scaremongering chain e-mails
>when I occasionally refute them I get "NO I DON'T THINK YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT ANON THIS PERSON IS A DOCTOR, YOU ONLY HAVE A DEGREE"
>visit her
>the post-its have increased
>she's manually writing down all the shit she's farming on farmville, recording the item buy/sell value, working out how best to re-sell things
>buzzing sounds every 25 minutes
>she's set the oven timer so she's alerted when it's time to harvest her crops
>dat old lady autism

Nana what am I going to do with you.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:01:59 No.3422110 Report

Quoted By:

>>3417029
>computer's RCA cables.
nigga what?

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO pc.jpg, 102KiB, 500x739

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:02:13 No.3422112 Report

Quoted By:

you should never help anybody with their computer problems.

except when it is the laptop of your hot coworker, when you know she has a video of her stripping on it

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:03:37 No.3422128 Report

Quoted By: >>3422171

>>3422094
You're an idiot. Every major brand fills their laptops with auto-recovery shovelware - it's practically standard they come with a partition especially for it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:03:43 No.3422130 Report

Quoted By:

>be in middle school
>suddenly computer next to mine gets black screen on monitor
>teacher knows i'm a fast typist.
>"oh anon, what would you do"
>i'd check if it randomly turned off, and if it didn't, then check the monitor
>oh okay anon
>check monitor
>broken monitor
>"good job anon!, i should send you down to work with the IT people"
fucking hated that guy.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:04:06 No.3422133 Report

Quoted By: >>3422189

>>3422104
>>dat old lady autism

nigga wat

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:04:32 No.3422137 Report

Quoted By: >>3424058

>>3417355
i don't trust other people when they ask me how i get my games/music/tv shows/movies etc.
i know they're going to fuck it up and blame me for it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:04:44 No.3422140 Report

Quoted By: >>3422186

My father is a computer programmer of sorts, he writes AI programs for camera based tracking systems. At various points he's also worked on missile defence systems and held some level of secret clearance with two different western governments.
He uses internet explorer.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:05:37 No.3422150 Report

Quoted By: >>3422189

>>3422104
My grandfather is in his 70's and I tried to teach him computers, but he just doesn't know how to fucking learn. He just tries to memorize what I show him (press the big button, wait for the screen to have a big picture in the backround with a bunch of little pictures on it, click the picture that is a blue "e", etc.). We just gave up.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:06:50 No.3422161 Report

Quoted By:

>be at work
>work with laser machines
>one screen is fucked
>retarded as fuck co-workers try to figure out wtf's wrong
>say you should just switch the screen to see if it's the screen fucked, or the cable, or something else
>get ignored
>get asked
>say the same shit, they disregard
>call someone from the maintenance
>does exactly what i had in mind

fuck those cunts

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:07:34 No.3422170 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419052
lucky fuck
i hate you.
not really though
good on you

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:07:36 No.3422171 Report

Quoted By:

>>3422128
If you're good with computers, you'll never see a system that has that shit on it. Because you'll format the hard drive and install a better operating system than what the laptop came with first thing.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:09:23 No.3422184 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
Fuck. I don't know if I can take any more stories
I want to punch your mom and your sister in the face
Holy fuck, how do they breathe?

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:09:52 No.3422186 Report

Quoted By:

>>3422140
Internet explorer is basically going bareback.

If you know what you're doing, you'll be fine.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:09:55 No.3422189 Report

Quoted By:

>>3422133
She's fucking obsessed with Farmville, man. She rang up our entire extended family trying to get us to be her Farmville friends so she could extend her farm acreage by 25%. She roped in my cousins and got them to ring up THEIR friends and get them to be her buddies too.

>>3422150
The sad thing is my grandfather was an IT lecturer/programmer. He gave up after about '98 though, he was too frail and the change was too fast for him to keep up.

>clearing out dead granddad's stuff
>find a fuckton of floppy disks from the early 90's
>fuck yeah granddad's copy of monkey island!

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:10:11 No.3422192 Report

Quoted By: >>3422276

>>3422005
>>3422005
>>3422005
>>>/b/418780431

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:10:39 No.3422196 Report

Quoted By:

>be technologically savvy
>friends know not to ask my for help on anything because they know i'll rage at their faces and call them a fucking idiot.
>feelsgoodman.jpeg

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:17:18 No.3422247 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416585

>dad thinks steam is bad for your computer

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:19:09 No.3422265 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420598
I don't know what you're talking about, I am thoroughly entertained.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:21:07 No.3422276 Report

Quoted By:

>>3422192
>implying anyone willingly goes to /b/

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:23:16 No.3422294 Report

Quoted By:

>>3421929
holy shit that's genius.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:24:38 No.3422303 Report

Quoted By:

>>3422082
>friend gives me flash drive to listen to some music
>put it in my xbox360 as i'm with friends and i don't want to go to my computer
>play music
>go though menus, and see "super secret hidden.mp4"
>WHAT'S THIS ANON
>oh no dude, it's a project i'm working on, i'm not done yet
>press play
>IT'S PORN
fucking shit.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:25:13 No.3422312 Report

Quoted By:

>Help someone buy a mp3 player
>They don't know you can open tabs
Good job i'm not related.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1282695228362.png, 7KiB, 189x159

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:26:00 No.3422320 Report

Quoted By: >>3422406

>on girlfriends computer
>find massive amounts of child pornography
>ask her about this
>"don't worry I used incognito mode"

How she is not v& by now I do not know

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:27:33 No.3422330 Report

Quoted By:

people just suck with computers. i don't get it.
i don't get it blox

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:29:47 No.3422346 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
you should've fucked up their computer in retaliation....

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:35:13 No.3422394 Report

Quoted By:

>go home
>anon my computer has viruses
>how do I make this microsoft warning go away
>look at computer
>ERROR RAM OVERHEATING
>PLEASE INSERT CREDIT CARD WE FIX HUEHUHUE
>mfw she was about to pay them
>didnt believe me it was a virus

Also
>anon look at my computer
>expects it done in 30 seconds
>breathing into my face heavily

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:36:34 No.3422406 Report

Quoted By: >>3423560

>>3422320
You only get vanned for uploading. Downloading is a non-issue.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:37:21 No.3422413 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
How did you not burn down the house

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 22:58:27 No.3422549 Report

Quoted By: >>3424497 >>3424642 >>3430158

>mother buys an expensive top specs alienware to add to her laptop, ipad and iphone
>I use it more than her whenever I'm around
>she asks me to install half life 2 for her
>we own three copies of this game
>lol nope says steam, it's a old game, we lost the codes for it long ago
>she blames me for it not installing
>"ARE YOU STUPID WE OWN THE GAME WHY CANT YOU GET IT WORKING"
>hour long explanation of the retardation of steam and drm
>"NO ITS YOUR FAULT A COMPANY WOULDNT MAKE IT WRONG"
>say i'll just torrent it for her
>"NO ALL TORRENTS HAVE VIRUSES EVERY SINGLE ONE"
>"no mum they don't or no one would pirate"
>"I KNOW MORE ABOUT COMPUTERS THAN YOU" (nearly went home at this point) "THEY ALL HAVE VIRUSES"
>I have nearly 15 torrented games already installed on her alienware
>literally have pirated them on one computer, transferred on memory stick and installed right in front of her
>she doesn't know they're pirated
>keep quiet
>eventually pirate it in the middle of the night, install and tell her i got the legit copies working
>she's happier not knowing i reason

and that's why i visit so rarely dear mummy

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 23:06:16 No.3422622 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420156
it seriously used to about 15 years ago, because windows used to be a lot glitchier and rerender the desktop constantly, even in the background (having a large background image/dynamic background would also be a problem)

it doesn't do that anymore though

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 23:16:41 No.3422695 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
That's the purest rage that I've felt in a long time

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO dunning_kruger.png, 36KiB, 434x395

Anonymous Tue 14 Aug 2012 23:24:52 No.3422779 Report

Quoted By: >>3423916

Dunning-Kruger Effect all over this thread. Wiki it or watch this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XyOHJa5Vj5Y (shitty visuals but good explanation)

In short to gauge one's own competence in something one needs to have at least some of the the very skills they need to be competent at it. So people can't tell they're shit at something until they actually know something about it

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 00:34:18 No.3423560 Report

Quoted By:

>>3422406
No, you can get v& for downloading too.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 01:09:19 No.3423916 Report

Quoted By:

>>3422779
Thanks for that. That was quite interesting.

I noticed this as well back when I was 17 or so. Stupid people seem unable to realise how stupid they are.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 01:23:11 No.3423995 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416585
OH FUCK! Damn stupid "adults"
Then they wonder why i'm a cynical skeptic person. You fucking raised me with injustice and lies!

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 01:31:51 No.3424058 Report

Quoted By:

>>3422137
Oh god! This, so much this.
>Anon, can you fix this problem?
I can, but if i do it will change the appearance and some functionalities, so i tell them no.
>Anon, i downloaded that pirate game, how do i crack it?
How about you read the fucking read me file?

I could probably know a lot more about computers if not for my hatred of dealing with stupid people that think i have magic powers and will fix anything. But i only learn to solve my simple problems and they won't get any more complex because i'm not stupid.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO women_cannot_into_computers.png, 124KiB, 1795x709

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 01:48:37 No.3424186 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420448
>>3420456
>>3420598
SAVED
I don't remember the last time I've been this mad due to someone's stupidity and ignorance

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 01:54:09 No.3424239 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419209
It's called mirror neurons. Science has figured out the "monkey see, monkey does" phenomenon.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 01:56:14 No.3424256 Report

Quoted By:

>aunt comes over to visit
>sitting in my room when mum calls me downstairs
>aunt has somehow managed to get my sisters laptop and is staring at it
>Aunt: "How do I check my email?"
>...Do what you normally do at home.
>Mum: "But doesn't she need the password to access the airwaves?"
>wat. This is [sister]s laptop, the wifi is already set up.
>"Right but doesn't she need the password?"
>For what!?
>Aunt: "I just want to know how to check my email!"
>Go onto whatever site you normally do, how the fuck would I know what you use.
>she starts typing her email address into the google search bar
>da fuq
>"How do I press underscore?"

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:03:57 No.3424318 Report

Quoted By:

>turn on my mom's laptop
>open internet explorer
>there are at least 10 toolbars, some of which are in languages she can't even speak
>Weird popups all over the place
>Yahoo instant messenger pops up, people are asking me if I want sex
>Dried food all over the keyboard
>Keys are missing

What the fuck, mom

Plum

Plum Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:10:04 No.3424369 Report

Quoted By: >>3431341

>>3419256
>>3419256
I see your words but they make no sense.
PPC, what the fuck are you talking about, I assume your not referring to pay per click but what I think your referring to PowerPC, in which case...

>Implying xbox executables aren't in PPC
There not

>Implying macs dont have a PPC processor
They don't

>Implying you couldn't use the wealth of information on mac executables to make an emulator
Lost me, what the fuck are you talking about?

>Implying implications
You are dumb like John Smith, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:13:52 No.3424402 Report

Quoted By:

>go to a party
>the host's sister puts his laptop in her bathroom
>I notice it when I walk in to piss (it's recording the webcam) I tell her to remove it
next morning
>computer goes into startup repair when he starts it and is unable to boot afterwards
>I assume it's a hard drive issue
>joke about putting it in the freezer
I had to spend 5 minutes explaining how that wouldn't actually work and would kill the battery and screen

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:14:54 No.3424407 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419967
>>3419826

Pardon my ignorance, but could you say more about demonoid and your opinions, please?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:18:29 No.3424429 Report

Quoted By:

>tfw I work in IT support and some of the people in this thread are pretty dumb themselves

Still, not as bad as a /g/ thread about this.

Plum

Plum Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:21:05 No.3424446 Report

Quoted By:

>Showing mum something incredibly basic on PC, forget what exactly
>Me: "Mum, just push the button..the button right there, just push...god damn just push the button right there
>MFW she reaches out and starts pushing on the screen

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:22:05 No.3424453 Report

Quoted By:

My step-dad and Sticky Keys.

>need I say more

eeyore !!9lZaZkipt0u

eeyore !!9lZaZkipt0u Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:22:39 No.3424459 Report

Quoted By: >>3424465

>cousin's ex has computer with XP and 64gb HDD
>wants windows 7

>torrent photoshop for her
>calls me a hacker

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:23:55 No.3424465 Report

Quoted By:

>>3424459
you don't need to torrent photoshop
the version supplied by adobe is bit identical

Plum

Plum Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:24:41 No.3424471 Report

Quoted By: >>3424667

> Showing mum basic FPS controls.
> "Just move the mouse to move your head around"
> She starts to rotate the mouse clockwise and anti-clockwise without actually moving it
> "This thing is broken"

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO YuJbc.jpg, 226KiB, 863x752

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:24:55 No.3424475 Report

Quoted By:

>>3417430
the Mr. Bones comparison is eerily accurate...
>pic related

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:25:46 No.3424484 Report

Quoted By:

I work in a remote support office for small businesses so I speak to some dumb people almost daily.

>MY BOSS SENT ME AN E-MAIL WHERE IS IT
>check the e-mail security, it's gone through fine
>open up his Outlook profile on the server, the mail is right there
>get onto his computer
>open up Outlook
>has all the sections for the different days collapsed instead of open
>click the little arrow to open them
>OH WOW YOU FOUND ALL MY E-MAIL THANK YOU MAN

Also I have to set up e-mails on a lot of people's phones by talking them through it. So frustrating when they tell you they're wrong but it turns out they were spelling their fucking user name wrong.

anon !!7ke5jlcv7mt

anon !!7ke5jlcv7mt Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:26:40 No.3424497 Report

Quoted By:

>>3422549

Considering my mother tells me off whenever I kill anything in any video game because it's "not very nice" I think you should stfu and count yourself lucky your mom actually plays.

I am well jell.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:27:03 No.3424499 Report

Quoted By:

Hahaha, I just remembered a good one...
>KillZone 3 had just came out
>Friend wanted to get it but he only had Xbox 360
>Talking about it one day
>Says he got KillZone 4
>On his computer
>And the file was only 4KB
We also nearly convinced this kid to delete system 32.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:28:17 No.3424513 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
I hope you mother dies a horrible death.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:37:53 No.3424593 Report

Quoted By: >>3424685

>Minding my own business and installing OpenBSD on my router
>Mama starts yelling from downstairs
>"What is it mama?"
>"SERGIO! EL COMPUTER NO WORKO! NO GUSTA!"
>Go downstairs, find that there is taco sauce on the monitor, tostadas on the keyboard, tortillas in the optical drive, salsa in the heatsink, guacamole on the southbridge, burritos in the case fan, beans cooking on the Fermi, and tacos in the PSU.
>Fuck it, I'll buy her a Mac
>Go to Apple store
>Considering purchasing an iMac
>Steve Jobs is there
>Talks to me about the iMac
>I get really hyped for the iMac
>Decide to buy it on the spot
>Reach for my wallet
>Suddenly, spaghetti spills out of my pocket
>There's spaghetti on the floor
>Everybody walk the dinosaur
>Try to clean it all up
>I look down
>There's fur in the spaghetti, leading to the realization that I am a bear

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:40:11 No.3424620 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420507
This.
I shit myself whenever my parents force me to search for something on my computer and watch despite theres being on only 2 rooms away

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:42:05 No.3424642 Report

Quoted By:

>>3422549
She plays fps? That's so cool...

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:44:18 No.3424667 Report

Quoted By: >>3424701 >>3424794

>>3424471
My mother wanted me to show her Portal. She got to the part where it teaches you about how your momentum is preserved when falling, and kept managing to miss the portal you need to jump into.

After much staring trying to figure out what the fuck she was doing wrong, despite watching her do it, it turns out she thought you were looking down the gun as if it had sights, not holding it at the hip, so she was thinking everything was weidly off to the right and trying to compensate.

Smart, but stupid as fuck at the same time.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:45:45 No.3424685 Report

Quoted By:

>>3424593
>Go downstairs, find that there is taco sauce on the monitor, tostadas on the keyboard, tortillas in the optical drive, salsa in the heatsink, guacamole on the southbridge, burritos in the case fan, beans cooking on the Fermi, and tacos in the PSU.

My friend put a (greasy) chicken wing on top of his xbox to change the disk.

Leaves them all over the place upside down on top of the tv and shit.

Why don't people take care of their shit and not get their stuff so fucking messy.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:46:48 No.3424701 Report

Quoted By: >>3424794

>>3424667
>>3424667
My 65 year old grandmother wanted me to download LA Noire on her laptop. Never got around to it though.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:54:20 No.3424794 Report

Quoted By:

>>3424667
>>3424701
That's awesome! My mom asks me how people on the other side of the world don't fall into space since they're upside down and yours are playing PORTAL!

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 02:57:11 No.3424836 Report

Quoted By: >>3424932

>>3420210

>2012
>not changing your default icons to custom made ones that you like

You can do that?

Hear me out, I've already done that with all my iTunes music. But I didn't know you could do it with desktop icons. Just never occurred to me.

...this might be fun.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 03:01:51 No.3424882 Report

Quoted By:

>"anon, can you take out your iPhone?"
>"sure...?"
>as she's holding iPhone she says "call this number-- six, zero --"
>"wait, are you serious?"
>"what?"
>"... just click the number..."
>"oh my God! I didn't know I could call like that!"

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 03:06:17 No.3424932 Report

Quoted By: >>3425424

>>3424836
please be a troll. please.

there is no way someone in r9k could be THIS stupid. come on guys.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 03:17:54 No.3425044 Report

Quoted By:

>My mom once startet reading the licence agreement while installing something
>She's had a laptop for several years but still can't copy-paste, and doesn't understand what folders are
>She asks me to help her with something, and I tell her that I never did that something before and I'm just reading instructions and clickin 'next'. Then she says "I'll never learn this"

>A friend of ours calls up saying her computer's slow
>"Run a CCleaner"
>Not enough space on computer to download CCleaner
>Finally download a rar
>"Ok, now extract it with winrar"
>"I dunno, I clicked it and there's just this white box"
>"*sigh* Is there a little picture of books in the corner?"
>"Yes"
>"That's winrar"

SLdeuce !!jhMH8NO6FeN

SLdeuce !!jhMH8NO6FeN Wed 15 Aug 2012 03:34:12 No.3425241 Report

Quoted By: >>3427530

> My mom borks her desktop
> Has a mhz processor 256 mb of ram 15 gb ide drive
> uses my computer for a long fucking time
> get new laptop for xmas
> she tells me her laptop is broke
> it blue screened and wouldnt boot to safe
> tell her i have to wipe it
> she yells at me cause she lost all her ms word
> install open office she gets mad at that

Also
> she gets a mac
> mfw it does absolutely nothing the way its supposed to

Dad wants into computers
> tell him to buy mac cause hes dumb and its pretty user friendly
> cant figure out email
> cant figure out printing
> cant figure out admin pass
> can figure out more than i thought he would
> fatheriamproud.png

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 03:39:59 No.3425305 Report

Quoted By: >>3429218

>>3415720
>Annoying kid from high school somehow got my number
>Calls me at least once a month, usually between the hours of 2 am and 6 am
>"ANON I HAVE A VIRUS"
>Ask him what's happening

You deserve a medal.

Even if I was awake and someone rang me up at those hours asking for that kind of help I would flip my shit.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 03:50:21 No.3425407 Report

Quoted By: >>3425618

>tfw your dad is an engineer and actually really good with technology
I would always go to him for computer help when I was younger. My mom on the other hand, is the reason why Apple products exist

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 03:53:27 No.3425424 Report

Quoted By:

>>3424932

>please be a troll. please.

I'm not. I'm serious. It just never occurred to me.

I mean, now that I think about it, it makes sense. I just never really thought about doing it.

I guess the sad thing is that everyone at school thinks I'm a tech prefect, so whenever they fuck up their computer, they go to me before they go to the IT department. I'm usually able to straighten it out easily.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 04:06:16 No.3425566 Report

Quoted By: >>3427383

>>3416585
>tfw when I've had my own computer since I was 7 years old.
>tfw even my 80 year old grandmother can program.

feelsgoodman.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 04:08:44 No.3425586 Report

Quoted By: >>3426009

>Uncle works for some tech company
>He's a business man, but has to know about computers anyway since his company is some sort of hardware company
>Talk to him about my comp sci class and that I'm going to be working on a machine he gave me a year ago
>Tells me about what software I should run
>he throws in there "Yeah, I have a bunch of Mac OS discs from work if you want them. It's a superior operating system to windows"
>hide my power level and tell him that I'll definitely call him if I need one

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 04:11:37 No.3425618 Report

Quoted By: >>3426318

>>3425407
>tfw your dad is an engineer and *WAS* actually really good with technology

It's nice that he's not totally pants-on-head retarded, but it's kinda sad that he just stopped giving a fuck around 2002 and started to buy whatever cheap shitbox was on sale at Worst Buy.

>mfw he still uses Office '97

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 04:17:16 No.3425673 Report

Quoted By:

stupid OP.. viruses don't jump out of html codes.. you cant get viruses if you dont download them. thats my statement.. discuss. am i rigth?.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 04:24:09 No.3425743 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419938
>check browser history
dick move bro.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 04:35:52 No.3425873 Report

Quoted By:

I am so worried. My TV broke, so my mom decided to give my grandma a laptop with Windows 7 so she could watch Netflix and play fucking video poker. I dread going home and having to help her every 5 minutes. Kill me now, /r9k/.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 61919276.jpg, 28KiB, 255x352

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 04:49:13 No.3426009 Report

Quoted By:

>>3425586
>hide my power level

You cheered me up anon

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 04:52:45 No.3426046 Report

Quoted By: >>3426391

>mfw people think i'm good with computers because i can type fast

stop

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1316650001572_.png, 160KiB, 424x470

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 05:01:40 No.3426144 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
I don't even know how to react.

....blox...

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 05:05:19 No.3426189 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
so much rage in one post god damn

fuck it I'm capping that

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 05:16:32 No.3426318 Report

Quoted By:

>>3425618
so do i

there's practically no reason to upgrade, aside from them updating the file format (so you gotta use online converters)

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 05:23:25 No.3426391 Report

Quoted By:

>>3426046
>mfw people think I'm good with computers just because I can code

Yeah, I'm good with them in that I know how they work on the lower level, but you can't expect me to help you with ObscureWord v2.5 Bundled-with-Your-Shitty-Computer Edition.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 05:28:39 No.3426436 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420598
Shit nigga. Suddenly my abusive alcoholic parents dont sound so bad.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 05:28:55 No.3426439 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
Wow. Just wow.
How do you take something someone bought with their own money? How shitty are your parents?
And they must have suspected something was up if all was well and good until your sister used your computer.
Also,
>going to best buy to fix a computer
>calling someone else computer illiterate

You have a shitty family dude.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 05:30:43 No.3426454 Report

Quoted By:

>this thread
>all of my fucking jimmies
>rustled

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 05:31:36 No.3426469 Report

Quoted By: >>3428988 >>3429397

just seeing a dell pc is enough to piss me off

Sure it's a computer but it's the extreme plebian normalfag of computers

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 05:33:55 No.3426484 Report

Quoted By: >>3438514

i have a story

Dad's computer heatsink is failing, need to get a new heatsink, pc is using an amd anthlon, so i got to find the right socket heatsink....he tells me how long it will take to replace the heatsink - i tell him "About a weeks top"

>>no i can't do that i need a pc now

>>he orders a dell insprion 620....

My god the old pc's integrated nvidia motherboards graphics look better than this current dell's intel extreme shit

FUCKING SIGH

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 05:35:02 No.3426491 Report

Quoted By:

>put together my own desktop
>Nothing special, just order the parts, put it in the slots, and plug it in.
>"omg you must be like some sort of like computer genius how do you even...!?!"

another time
>"omg can you write code?"
>"yeah, I'll show you"
>write a virus that will allocate all their memory 1mb at a time for a week until all their memory is gone
>tell them it does something different than that
>leave, laugh at them
>one week later, they come to me and ask to fix their computer
>fix it
>praised as a God

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 05:42:20 No.3426541 Report

Quoted By:

>work at library computer lab
>there's always that person who doesn't know how to send a fucking email attachment
>kindly explain to them how to do it
>"Go to your email"
>they type in "www.google.com" into the address bar, then "www.yahoo.com" into the search box (they all use Yahoo, no exceptions), sign in, and go to their email
>"Now click compose"
>they spend 20 seconds trying to find the button despite it being clearly visible
>"Click attach, then browse"
>they don't know where they saved the file they wanted to attach
>every fucking time
>suggest looking in the documents folder
>have to teach them how to navigate folders because they have no idea what I just told them to do

At least they know what to do after that.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 45erre.png, 528KiB, 640x480

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 05:45:15 No.3426566 Report

Quoted By: >>3427571 >>3427605

My dad doesn't know how to
>Highlight text
>Copy and paste
>Minimize windows
>Type capital letters without Caps Lock
>Save pictures to a specific location
>Compose an email

I'm not much better, not knowing the difference between and a modem and a router, and being unable to change our internet security settings back to WEP after some tech-support Paki made us switch to WPA because my dad complained to our ISP about their shitty service.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 05:53:44 No.3426660 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416579
welcome to the consumer era ... where everyone doesnt give a shit bout shitty cheap products nor takes care of them cuz oh well we can buy another one.

stupid society is stupid and wasteful

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 07:14:41 No.3427383 Report

Quoted By: >>3427599 >>3429450

>>3425566
>tfw even my 80 year old grandmother can program.

What?! Elaborate on that, please. What the fuck does granny program?
Interactive cookie recipe experience easy to use for other grannies ?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 07:25:59 No.3427496 Report

Quoted By:

>Friends computer running really slow
>Scan it for viruses and malware
>6,532 hits

Jesus christ

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 07:28:34 No.3427530 Report

Quoted By:

>>3425241
>mfw it does absolutely nothing the way its supposed to
Reminds me of:
>Lots of friends using windows suddenly decide to get Apple laptops to complement their Windows gaming rigs when they got to university
>Being the "Mac Guru" of my circle of friends I end up taking the job of being their go to guy whenever they can't figure something out
>So much bitching about things not being EXACTLY THE SAME WAY AS WINDOWS and how OSX is shit because of it
>The few of them who have used Linux as their main use OS before this have virtually zero issues, sometimes call me up and ask about restrictions they think OSX has when in reality it has nothing of the sort
This is why I say that there are retarded people on every OS, Linux has less, but it still has retards amongst it's users

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 07:32:17 No.3427571 Report

Quoted By:

>>3426566
Want my advice? Leave it on WPA bro. I'm not here to jerk my own dick, but I can crack a WEP key in literally 35 seconds if there's traffic actively moving along the network.

Shit is unbelievably insecure.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 07:32:19 No.3427572 Report

Quoted By:

>borrow father's laptop
>sometimes I download games / videos / film / music and so on
>always remove everything again from the computer and makes sure it's well and gone
>it's a shit computer so it slows down after only a few months
>he's your typical middle-aged clueless computer person
>never says it outright but blames me for his shitty laptop not being as it was when he bought it
>even tried to talk him out of buying that shit
sigh

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 07:34:52 No.3427596 Report

Quoted By:

>>3414433

This. Motherfucking this.
I download all kind of torrents, at least 100GB a month and I never get viruses.

To be fair, I used to have plenty of shit back in 2006.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 07:35:09 No.3427599 Report

Quoted By: >>3427617

>>3427383

I'm not sure if program was the right word, shit. But granny makes websites for our massive family to talk, share photos, stupid family crap. Just simple shit. My dad (Her only son out of 7 children) is a technological wizard and taught her all this shit. The bitch even has an iPhone.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 07:35:33 No.3427600 Report

Quoted By:

I was just teaching mom how to use google maps
She thought google street view was composed by satellite pictures

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 07:35:50 No.3427603 Report

Quoted By:

>teacher tries to get rid of whatever's on screen
>presses 'escape' key and waits

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 07:36:11 No.3427605 Report

Quoted By:

>>3426566
whats up with wearing a shirt?

is this original?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 07:36:27 No.3427609 Report

Quoted By: >>3429672

>start a youtube chanel
>start making money with adsense
>show my mom the check
>she thinks im a hacker and stole the money
>threatens to call the cops if i dont give it back
:|

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 07:37:13 No.3427617 Report

Quoted By:

>>3427599
That's so cool! My granny hoarded food and was bitter as fuck.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 07:45:25 No.3427680 Report

Quoted By:

My laptop is totally fucked and, despite knowing most of this shit, I'm too cavalier to actually fix it unless it stops working altogether (has happened a few times). I've been waiting for this current one to completely fuck up so I can just get a new one.

After reading this thread, I think I will fix it before it dies again and prolong its life. Thanks Anon.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO rage-face-comic-48-530x390.jpg, 15KiB, 246x191

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 07:53:30 No.3427772 Report

Quoted By: >>3427912 >>3430024

>Dad still has Internet Explorer
>Suggest he use Firefox
>"I DON'T LIKE FIREFOX, ANON"
>Suggest Google Chrome
>"GOOGLE WILL FUCK UP THE COMPUTER. NEVER USE ANYTHING GOOGLE"
>Say that's ridiculous
>"YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT COMPUTERS. YOU ALWAYS GET VIRUSES BECAUSE YOU DOWNLOAD WALLPAPERS AND PLAY GAMES AND SHIT."
>mfw

Also, captcha: Macdonalds USAmad

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 07:55:16 No.3427789 Report

Quoted By: >>3428032

Why is it that people seem to think games are the main source of viruses?
When someone gets a virus, I imagine they were downloading a lot of porn or clicking the wrong place on torrent sites, not downloading games.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO you gonna get banshee'd.jpg, 245KiB, 1920x1080

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:02:51 No.3427874 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
Holy fuckity fuck I am mad.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:07:00 No.3427908 Report

Quoted By: >>3428135

> Anon, what's a word processor?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:07:19 No.3427912 Report

Quoted By:

>>3427772
>>"GOOGLE WILL FUCK UP THE COMPUTER. NEVER USE ANYTHING GOOGLE"
He's actually right. You should also go back to reddit.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:10:10 No.3427938 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
thefuryofonethousandsuns.jpg

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:11:53 No.3427955 Report

Quoted By: >>3434066

>father will type full address with the "www." in google search bar
>types each letter with his index finger slower then a turtle
>asks stupid as fuck questions ALL the time
>im no computer guru but I know some stuff
>try to explain the basics to him
>does not compute

I dont even know why I try.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:14:15 No.3427978 Report

Quoted By:

>>3414433
I wonder this too.
I download tons of shit and never get viruses.
You gotta be a complete retard to get a virus. like opening "free-mp3s.exe". and even then your antivirus would probably alert you as soon as you download the file or try to start it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:16:25 No.3427998 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
I feel a few veins about to burst from rage

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:17:08 No.3428010 Report

Quoted By: >>3428268

>Several years ago
>Dig out N64 to play some old favourites
>Set it up on the main TV in the living room, play some Banjo Tooie aw yeah
>Later the cable isn't working
>"This is all your nintendo's fault"
>But Dad I didn't touch anything related to the cable they work on completely different systems
>"It happened right after you put in your nintendo so it must have been"
>Turns out it wasn't
>He won't admit he was wrong and said I'm not allowed to play video games on that TV anymore

Also another time my mum wanted to put her music from her MP4 player on her computer, so I showed her how to copy and paste files on my computer because I can't be bothered going downstairs.
I went down later for snacks and found she still hadn't figured it out. I facepalm and just do it for her and ask how she managed to fail at copy paste. Dad cut in and said I'd showed her how to do it on Windows 7 when her computer was Windows XP, as if that made any difference, and she agreed with him.
I might add that she's had jobs involving computers since before I was born.

She's hopeless though. Keeps coming to me for help with her new tablet and she couldn't even figure out the Wii.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:19:38 No.3428032 Report

Quoted By: >>3428046

>>3427789
The logic is as follows:
>My kids play games on my computer
>The viruses on my computer are obviously not my fault because I'm the parent and they're the children
>Therefore, the viruses come from their games

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:21:26 No.3428046 Report

Quoted By:

>>3428032
It always just comes off to me as
>corporations make games for profit
>those sly bastards put viruses on them and laugh at us

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:25:39 No.3428091 Report

Quoted By:

>Download MBAM
>Dad says it's a virus
>He has a CS degree

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:27:44 No.3428114 Report

Quoted By:

>mom and aunt are always asking me for help
>they only use facebook
>don't wan't to be rude
>explain every time, they don't seem to get it
>always call me, because I am the "patient" one
>refuse to get help from any of my two brothers.

this was really fun. please archive this. good night.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:28:27 No.3428128 Report

Quoted By: >>3430998

>few years back
>at high school
>the IT department are a bunch of morons
>sitting in a computer class, all my work finished browsing random site
>Message from teacher pops up on desktop "do your work" and closes the internet
>next day, sitting in another class
>using the computer because works all done
>log in as admin because our schools name in lowercase is not a secure password for admin
>watching previously mentioned teachers desktop
>he's giving a slideshow presentation
>open up gay porn in browser on his computer which is connected to a projector
>type in "I was finished my work fuck head, dont ever close the internet on me again"
>his class is next
>wants to talk to me in the hall
>says he knows that was me and gives me a brofist but tells me never to open gay porn infront of a grade 9 class again
>lulz were had

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:29:33 No.3428135 Report

Quoted By:

>>3427908
>Anon, why won't this file open on my computer? I saved it at home and it worked just fine but it won't work here.
>look at file extension
>it's in some format for a word processor nobody's heard of

Anoneriffic

Anoneriffic Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:29:57 No.3428141 Report

Quoted By:

>Get new desktop during tax free weekend
>Laptop isn't in use now
>Sister wants to use it
>"Fuck no. I paid for it and you'll screw it up".
>She gets butthurt, tells parents.
>Dad forces me to let her use it.
>Within days, she has filled it with hundreds of pics of herself to go on her facebook
>Downloaded multiple toolbars
>Has Vuze AND Utorrent, seeding from both
>Hundreds of other things I don't even want to discuss
>Laptop barely starts up
>Internet barely opens
>Error messages every 5 seconds
>Honestly feel like just throwing it through the window
>Scan it for viruses, malware, etc.
>FUCK TONS UPON FUCK TONS FOUND
>Eventually end up having to reformat and all that jazz

Not to mention I told her to never, ever eat or drink around it and there was food caked into every space between keys. I also found out, if it weren't for my dad being close by, she would have spilt milk all over it. I have never let her touch it since despite my dad saying I should.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:32:11 No.3428172 Report

Quoted By: >>3428182 >>3432009

>have to use home computer because laptop is getting fixed
>its slow as fuck
>notice it has no anti virus software
>ask mom why
>"oh macs dont get viruses"
GOD DAMMIT.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:33:25 No.3428182 Report

Quoted By:

>>3428172
At least she didn't say right after that
>"it just works!"
That drives me crazy.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:38:59 No.3428268 Report

Quoted By:

>>3428010
Oh god, computer illiterate parents are an unending source of frustration and aggravation. Every time my dad calls my heart sinks because I know I'll be spending an inordinate amount of time explaining the simplest things to him. You'd think it would just take a moment, but when explaining you realize how many steps are involved that you normally breeze through almost subconsciously. Recently I realized it's pointless to teach dad because he uses his computer so seldom that he just keeps forgetting for lack of practice. Might as well install some program that allows me to do everything remotely for him. Faster than explaining stuff over the phone to a guy who gets hopelessly confused by computer terminology.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:42:04 No.3428304 Report

Quoted By:

I have only met two people who got their computers so bad they couldn't work anymore, i can't even believe you guys about people killing a computer withing 5 days of use. Mine usually goes for so ling without formating that i loose the windows cds and Isos and have to pirate it and burn it all over again.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:43:34 No.3428327 Report

Quoted By: >>3430395 >>3432233

>be little kid
>dad is a fucking god with computers
>about 5
>hey anon, come check this out
>dad shows me Far Cry, Max Payne, Counter Strike, Half Life, Grim Fandango, and every fucking other game that exists
>he is amazing with technology
>I don't have to put up with his shit because there is a lack of shit to be put up with
>I love you dad

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:43:40 No.3428328 Report

Quoted By:

>Friend calls me freaking out
>"ANON! MY COMPUTER HAS LIKE 300 VIRUSES WHAT DO I DO?!"
>Ask him if a pop-up is telling him that
>He says yes, reads off the name, it's one of those obvious rogue names like "Windows Super Security 2010"
>Tell him to just shut off the computer and wait for me to get over there and fix it
>Says no, it's fine, his parents are fixing it
>I know his parents are fucking retarded with computers, suspiciously ask him what he means
>"Oh, the program said we could pay $30 for the full version and my dad said that's a good deal so he bought it."
>Tell him to give the phone to his parents
>Tell them that they might want to cancel their credit card and explain to them what just happened
>His dad freaks out at me and starts telling me to stop "fear mongering"
>Hangs up on me
>Never hear from them again

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:52:50 No.3428441 Report

Quoted By: >>3428638

>Brother claims to be a god of everything computer related
>Ask him if he can download microsoft office for me off of one of the private torrent sites he's a member of
>Tells me to just use piratebay
>Fucking fine
>I start digging through the waves of shit torrents trying to find a good one
>He comes in to watch, gets pissed that I'm not doing it fast enough
>Takes over my computer, finds a VIP torrent, downloads it
>Tries to install it
>Windows AV goes off
>Him: "It's just a false positive, your AV is stupid."
>He tries to use the keygen
>Keys don't work
>Gets pissed and tells me to deal with it, leaves
>Delete the shit he downloaded
>AV is still going off
>Restart my computer
>No icons, no toolbar, no wallpaper, nothing. No commands work
>Start in safe mode, run MBAM
>12 different trojans, a keylogger, and a rootkit found
>Tell him thanks for fucking my computer
>He insists those were already there and it's not his fault

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 0i2juwhd.jpg, 25KiB, 421x539

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 08:58:02 No.3428488 Report

Quoted By: >>3428614

>Can't I just free up some RAM?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 09:10:15 No.3428614 Report

Quoted By:

>>3428488
Oh god, my fucking sides. I haven't laughed that hard in a long time. Thanks, anon.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 09:12:07 No.3428638 Report

Quoted By:

>>3428441
Sock him in the face.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 09:17:29 No.3428697 Report

Quoted By:

>>3416579
do you at least convince them to give you their "old and slow" laptops when they buy a new one? or do you just let them throw them away or some bullshit

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 09:24:31 No.3428766 Report

Quoted By:

>>3417226
ugh, so fucking slow. why don't you actually do them a favor and introduce them to a dual pane file manager?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 09:25:30 No.3428771 Report

Quoted By: >>3428781

> mother repeatedly calls a flash drive "SUV"

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 09:26:35 No.3428781 Report

Quoted By:

>>3428771
>mother repeatedly calls anything USB-related "UBS"

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 09:35:12 No.3428853 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419209
at least they admitted it

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 09:49:52 No.3428988 Report

Quoted By:

>>3426469
>plebian

FUCKING BLOX

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 09:52:05 No.3429007 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419675
Fucking laughed hard! Many many thanks.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 09:58:13 No.3429058 Report

Quoted By: >>3434390

My stories aren't nearly as bad as any of these.

>my uncle comes over to set up our new computer in our basement
>he installs six antivirus/scanning programs on the computer
>all are legitimate, and all are freeware, but still,
>6
>it's good that you're trying to be safe, but maaaaan
>our computer is this old xp machine, after a few months it runs extremely slow
>antivirus programs make computer take 30 minutes to start up
>any time a scan is running, computer freezes for 15 minutes
I finally had to uninstall a few of those programs, especially the ones that took forever to start up. One of the programs had no uninstall.exe, and at the time I didn't have any skills with registries or anything, so it took me forever to uninstall that one.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 10:08:05 No.3429139 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
No jury in the world would convict you.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 10:09:53 No.3429157 Report

Quoted By:

Im guessing I'm the only one here that my Dad was legitly more knowledgeable with Computers then most of my family and taught me how to actually use one without being a retard, He also taught me how to torrent and what Anti-viruses to get , Damn my dad is awesome

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 10:15:49 No.3429218 Report

Quoted By:

>>3425305
I wouldn't flip my shit, but I'd probably just say that's nice, then hang up

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 10:21:55 No.3429278 Report

Quoted By:

> be in computer repair/maintenance/etc class
> as part of the class, people bring in computers for us to fix
> usually simple software shit
> lady brings in her computer
> goddamn thing is dirty and stained
> "There's no audio or video." she said
> "I'll diagnose and get started right away, come back tomorrow." I said
> I decide to clean it first
> open it up...
> dust everywhere
> a few dead roaches
> smells like Raid, with stronger smell on motherboard
> "Damn, anon!"
> "What the fuck happen- is that Raid?"
> "Yeah this thing's fucked." I said.
The next day she comes back and our instructor asks the lady if she sprayed Raid inside the computer. She admits to it and everyone in the room facepalms hard.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 10:35:41 No.3429390 Report

Quoted By:

>>3420456
>>3420598

Oh god, anon. I'm...I'm so sorry.

If necessary, I will personally see to the total destruction of everything your family loves and believe in. They deserve nothing but a slow, torturous end.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 10:36:49 No.3429397 Report

Quoted By:

>>3426469
Think that's bad? We just got all new lenovo's at work. I thought Dell's were a pos. Half the center had BSOD's within the first hour.

On top of this they all came with IBM java pre installed for some god damned reason instead of sun java.

>Our software only works on Sun Java

Being in the QA department has the perk of being able to switch out Java, .net, and entire OS's quickly.

Oh but not the devs who FUCKING PROGRAM IN JAVA!!

>Anon can you help me uninstall and reinstall Java im not sure how to do it?
NOPE! Testing program xyz
>Comeon it will only take a sec man you guys do it in minutes all the time.
I said no man
>Im going to your boss!
Knock your self out.

Boss tells him to fuck off.

Repeat X 8 for 8 of the 12 devs.

So it doesn't end with family and friends.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 10:43:35 No.3429450 Report

Quoted By: >>3430108

>>3427383
> Interactive cookie recipe experience easy to use for other grannies
That wouldn't be so bad

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 11:14:57 No.3429672 Report

Quoted By:

>>3427609
This is why I keep my monetary matters to myself

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 11:49:28 No.3429884 Report

Quoted By:

Not computers, but whatever.

>Grandpa is watching tv
>Yells at me to come to the living room
>Come out and ask what's wrong
>"How do I record this" (we had that direct tv dvr thing)
>Show him specifically which buttons to press
>Next day
>Same shit
>Show him how to do it again
>Repeatxinfinity

>Grandpa gets a cell phone
>My aunts and uncles try to send him text messages and shit
>He asks me why there's a letter on the phone
>Tell him it's a text
>Open his texts
>Inbox full
>Shit from weeks before hadn't even been opened

The guy can rebuild a car from scratch, but god forbid he try to watch tv or use a cell phone.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 12:08:10 No.3430024 Report

Quoted By:

>>3427772
this isn't that bad actually
I'm sure you don't much about computers yourself besides what browser runs fastest

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 12:20:31 No.3430108 Report

Quoted By:

>>3429450
I know, it would be awesome if a granny programmed it also.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 12:28:38 No.3430158 Report

Quoted By:

>>3422549
cathy gone crazy

GreenTrash-chan !6mvmNVD6E6

GreenTrash-chan !6mvmNVD6E6 Wed 15 Aug 2012 12:32:51 No.3430183 Report

Quoted By:

>About 2 years ago
>Estranged aunt wants me to fix her computer while she catches up with my dad
>Boots up pretty damn slow, but manageable
>Turn on Internet Explorer
>Wait like 5 god damn minutes for a Google search to load
>"Wow, your internet is running unusually slow."
"Oh, that's because I have 56K"

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 12:42:37 No.3430228 Report

Quoted By:

>mom bought this 8.5 inch laptop for no reason
>its 8.5, not even shitting you
>first off, i let her know that computer is worthless on all levels
>"Anon, how do i get the internet?"
>i mouse over and click google chrome (which I installed for her)
>"NO THAT WAS TOO FAST, SHOW ME AGAIN"
>"Mom, I clicked one button..."
>"FINE, ILL HAVE SOMEBODY ELSE SHOW ME"
>"I'm cool with that."

15 minutes later....

>"ANON, HOW DO I GET MY PICTURES ON THE SCREEN?"

i wonder what % of American moms are retarded when it comes to computers.

GreenTrash-chan !6mvmNVD6E6

GreenTrash-chan !6mvmNVD6E6 Wed 15 Aug 2012 12:42:56 No.3430232 Report

Quoted By:

Mom: "The printer won't print this for me."
>The printer was working fine earlier today. Show me what you're trying to do.
"Here, it says in order to print this coupon I have to download their Coupon Printer. I keep clicking it and nothing is happening!"
>Look at her desktop
>CouponPrinter.exe
>CouponPrinter.exe
>CouponPrinter (1).exe
>CouponPrinter (2).exe
>CouponPrinter (3).exe
>So on
>Try to explain to her why she doesn't need these coupons, and why she shouldn't ever try to print anything that makes you want to download something first.
>Weeks later, her computer is bogged down with spyware and adware
>Clean
>Repeat twice, including my speech on why she should stop finding coupons online.
>It's been years and I bought her a new computer
>Find CouponPrinter(6).exe on her desktop
>Can't wait to move out

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 12:54:46 No.3430307 Report

Quoted By:

My mom has problem dealing with the automatic lockers on her new car.

Yes, seriously.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 13:10:13 No.3430395 Report

Quoted By:

>>3428327
>about 5
>Far Cry
So you were born in 1999?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 13:10:30 No.3430398 Report

Quoted By:

>Day off, I'm the IT guy
>Get a call
>"Oh Anon, my station won't turn on, I can't get any work done."
>Go through some basic troubleshooting, she can hear fans but nothing else.
>Figured it was the video card or monitor, I have replacements for both.
>Go to work and go to her station
>Monitor was off, turn it on and the day is saved.
>I think I'm done here.
>Stay clocked in, go to the server room (my sanctuary)
>Browse internet for about four hours, go home
>God damn she was hot.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1344250931644.jpg, 91KiB, 1280x720

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 13:25:37 No.3430455 Report

Quoted By: >>3430993 >>3431153

>Get laptop as graduation gift from older brother
>Mom wants to try laptop because it looks fun
>Wary because she's never used a laptop before, has weak hands and insists on holding it in midair but let her anyway
>"How do you make the screen brighter?"
>"How do you make the text bigger?"
>"What do you have to do to make it blah blah blah"
>"This isn't like the computer I used at work"
>Okay, mom, let me start with...
>"You're trying to make me feel stupid, aren't you?"
>No but you said you wanted to know...
>"Here. Take your computer back. I know I'm old but SOME people don't know things as well as others!"
>...Fine.
>Endure years of "Anon, won't let me use his computer! He treats me like I'm technologically retarded! I'd shop online ANON has a computer but *I* don't... I need to get a computer..."
>Get "Anon, why are you so mean to your mom? Why can't she use your computer?"
>She can use it anytime. I've never stopped her.
>"That's because you get mad whenever I ask you to use it!"
>(That's a blatant lie but whatever.) Well, ask me whatever you want then and I'll answer the best I can.
>"Oh you know I don't know how to use these things..."

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 14:49:04 No.3430908 Report

Quoted By:

>tfw your dad teaches you how to torrent and hack shit

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 15:04:24 No.3430986 Report

Quoted By:

Some people are just technologically blind, I know you're old and stuff, but it's not hard.

>Grandmother wants to watch youtube video
>Just press play here
>Where?
>The play button, like on a video recorder and VHS and stuff
>Okay, how do I watch it again?
>Move the mouse over here and click play
>Eugh, these computers are so hard, how do people these days get their head around this?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 15:06:11 No.3430993 Report

Quoted By:

>>3430455
I don't think she's actually mad, she just sounds like she's messing with you.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 15:07:46 No.3430998 Report

Quoted By:

>>3428128
I like when people give creative lies in threads and not simple frustrated 12yo revenge dreams shit.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 15:09:33 No.3431007 Report

Quoted By:

The good ol' story of

>Anon, the computer was slow, so I just deleted some of your video games to make up room for memory, they take up too much space!
>internet has like 50 task bars
>They only deleted the desktop shortcuts of the games

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 15:23:22 No.3431060 Report

Quoted By: >>3431195

>make a script that opens the CD-ROM and close its on loop.
>Then opens IE or whatever you want and goes to a website of your choosing. Like meatspin ect.
>The only way to stop the script is to restart the computer or end the process in task manger.
>Run it on all the classroom computers
>indian teacher goes berserk spouting sperg shit and telling the class too make it stop
>entire class gets kept in at recess
Was worth it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 15:39:30 No.3431153 Report

Quoted By:

>>3430455
She's just proud and sad and envy that you know something she doesn't know about.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 15:46:55 No.3431195 Report

Quoted By:

>>3431060
Hah, you don't know shit about good stories.
>teacher can't for shit at the computer, always has to search the letters one by one
>one day, we were in one of the rooms for the computer
>teacher was already logged on but received a call and left the room
>changed the buttons on the keyboard
>teacher comes back
>wtf I can't type anymore
>a projector shows what gibberish he's typing
>10 minutes later
>laugh like the crazy fuckers we are
>he's angry and goes into full rage-mode
>smashes keyboard with his fist
>then politely asks one of use to give him our keyboard
>dead silence

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 15:52:34 No.3431230 Report

Quoted By:

>>3417465
actually that would not be a bad idea.
having an image board that also streams video games.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 15:57:04 No.3431259 Report

Quoted By:

There are only two things which annoy me greatly dealing with computers. One is my sister, she is one of those fucking morons who thought days were better when they only had VHS and she thinks technology (but only technology she doesn't use that is) is pointlessly advanced. So she thinks that my computer is some sort of NSA level hacking machine when it's 4 years old and just well maintained, and she thinks I apparently have a problem because I'm "too attached to technology." Fucking...I don't even.

The other is when anyone asks me for help downloading stuff:
>"hey anon can you get me a link to this album"
>give them a MF link as they will be too stupid to use anything else
>"hey, the police won't get me because of this will they?"
>no they won't stop being a retard
>"oh man something popped up on the site, I bet I have a virus now"
>No you don't just download the album
>"I can't open it"
>link them to WinRar
>"I dunno, this looks a bit sketchy to me"
>It really isn't, oh god
>"Can't you just download and put it on a CD for me? I don't want to get into trouble for all this piracy"
>...

Incidentally I have never met a single person who hasn't told me that I will go to jail over downloading things.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 16:14:30 No.3431341 Report

Quoted By:

>>3424369

not him but

>xbox executables aren't PPC

http://www.free60.org/XEX

>XEX is the executable file format used by the Xbox 360 operating system. It seems to be a crypto and packing container for PPC PE executable files

>macs dont have a PPC processor
You were half right, macs made after 2005 don't

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PowerPC

>Lost me, what the fuck are you talking about?

Hes probably saying you could use lists of PPC opcodes made for disassembling mac executables to make an emulator, which I agree is pretty retarded

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 16:18:24 No.3431361 Report

Quoted By:

>>3419356
yeah this is like the basicest of basics. If you don't know to delete system32 then you shouldn't be allowed to enter the self-checkout lane

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO c31.png, 77KiB, 200x222

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 17:55:06 No.3431915 Report

Quoted By:

> Grandmother gets a laptop.
> Checked out the specs out of curiosity.
> 4GB hard-drive
> " Uh... Hey, you may want to get a better hard-drive. "
> " Shut up Anon! I don't need anymore memory this is enough!"
> Fast forward a few days.
> " Anon, why can't I install these games and put on all my pictures and videos? ( 24 GBs worth ) "
> Mfw shes been a bank secretary for 20 years, and spends 90% of her working hours on the computer and can't determine obvious crap.

And another tale:

> " I don't trust buying things | Paying bills | Online. "
> She does her company's billing Online.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 18:07:22 No.3432009 Report

Quoted By: >>3432022

>>3428172
Well she is kind correct... There have been a bunch of trojans (pieces of malware the user has to download and install themselves) on OSX over the last few years, but we're yet to see a virus or a worm that is a threat to an up-to-date system or in general circulation.

On a related note:
>Friend who thinks he's really savvy with computers and stuff. You know the type, who have a Windows desktop they put together themselves that they play games on, but don't have any experience on an OS other than Windows, don't know how to program their way out of a paper bag and consider OSX to be some kind of Fisher-Price OS (when in reality it's a much more solid at it's base than Windows has ever been)
>Then one day he gets a an leftover 13" Macbook from a family member and decides to call me up that he's now going to prove to me how shitty macs are by using one (I've never picked any kind of argument with him about Windows or Macs)

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 18:07:50 No.3432015 Report

Quoted By: >>3432268 >>3432387 >>3434644 >>3436150

>download all my textbooks because they're expensive
>couldn't find them anywhere but with a combination of 4chan and some people I know online, I was able to find them all but it wasn't easy
>mom tells one of her clients that I downloaded my textbooks
>client wants her dumbfuck kids to do it but they can't figure out how
>mom promises that she'll have me write up step by step instructions on how to do it, without even knowing the name of the books they want
>I can't, for obvious reasons
>client threatens to fire her unless I come up with the instructions
>this is what happens when you run your mouth off and make promises for other people knowing nothing about how the internet works.
Now here I am, client threatening to fire my mother, parents threatening not to cosign my college loans, yelling at me how much of a failure I am, all because I had the bright fucking idea that I'd get my textbooks for free. Fuck me, right?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 18:08:52 No.3432022 Report

Quoted By:

>>3432009
>A few days later he calls me up, asking if I can come over to explain some "bullshit" on OSX to him
>Come over and find that he's used the desktop for storing his files, dock is the standard one you have after a fresh install and the main HDD has been named something that looks like what you get when you punch a keyboard
>Complains to me about how he has to start firefox by opening the HDD and navigating his way to programs and then starting it from there (too dumb to drag the icon to the dock), how it doesn't have a start button, how it doesn't have a search feature, how programs don't have installers but these "weird .dmg things you have to open", how "those weird .dmg things" leave behind "these weird HDD like things" (they're called disc images you unmount when you're done), how performance in games sucks (well no shit, it's a laptop with an Intel GMA X3100 GPU) and various other PEBKAC issues
Interestingly enough he's also a regular on /g/ and posts quite regularly in their anti mac topics about things like how OSX is now so locked down you can't install programs any other way than trough the App Store (which is completely incorrect). The reason why I know this is because he sometimes calls me up and asks me to come over and explain his incorrect assumptions.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 18:39:11 No.3432223 Report

Quoted By: >>3432348

Can someone explain whats wrong with norton (which I use since my dad bought me it) and what antivirus would be bettet?
I don't into computers :L

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 18:40:21 No.3432233 Report

Quoted By:

>>3428327
>about 5
>dad shows me Far Cry

Far Cry came out in 2004, so that would make you about 13.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 18:44:44 No.3432268 Report

Quoted By: >>3432356

>>3432015
Put them on a CD and hand them over, jesus.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 18:46:52 No.3432288 Report

Quoted By:

>be in middle school
>have to do some presentation
>it was those ancient times when burners were expensive as fuck and pendrives were nonexistant
>teacher said I can give her the presentation in digital format
>get a floppy and try to copy the file
>file too large
>rar it, it fits
>mfw the teacher couldn't access the file because she didn't know how to unpack it
>mfw we get told to not do this shit because teachers ain't fucking magicians
>mfw only the dead can know peace from this evil
>mfw I have no face

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 18:56:23 No.3432348 Report

Quoted By:

>>3432223
poor detection rates
major resource hog
it's actually easier to format and reinstall windows than to try removing norton

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 18:57:49 No.3432356 Report

Quoted By:

>>3432268
reread the post man, his dumbass mom didn't even find out what textbooks they want

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 19:02:57 No.3432387 Report

Quoted By:

>>3432015
>download xchat
>install xchat
>read the instructions of xchat
>join the undernet channel #bookz (which they will be able to do after they have read the instructions)
>type Find or Search followed by the book title
>copy and paste the names of the results back into the box to begin download, if there are no results you will have to buy the books you cheap skates.

If they don't understand tell them to read the instructions again until they give up and buy them.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 19:07:31 No.3432429 Report

Quoted By: >>3432440

>dad introduces me to utorrent and demoniod
>demoniod gone
>nooo.jpg

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 19:09:22 No.3432440 Report

Quoted By:

>>3432429
>2012
>torrenting
gay

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 19:16:45 No.3432503 Report

Quoted By:

>tfw you are literally the only person in your family to have ever used a computer

Feels working class man

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 49300_100000353455024_4564_n.jpg, 7KiB, 200x130

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 21:26:59 No.3433532 Report

Quoted By: >>3434413 >>3440055

>using ArchLinux
>no one mess with your computer
>when people ask me to fix their stuff I give the shitty 'I only know lunix' excuse
>they buy it
>mfw

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 22:26:43 No.3434066 Report

Quoted By:

>>3427955
>father will type full address with the "www." in google search bar

Knew this guy that actaully typed in the full URL https://www.derpherp.com

Asked him why

>cuz I want to.

What the fuck?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 22:30:27 No.3434103 Report

Quoted By: >>3442792

>aunt called Comcast because her computer, not her Internet service,was slow
>she had never cleared her recycle bin after about 2-3 years of use because she somehow deleted the recycle bin icon
>Internet explorer had like 6 toolbars
>computer had 2 trial antivirus programs that loaded at startup
>took ~2 minutes for it to respond to a mouseclick
>I asked her if the computer being this slow really bothered her
>she says it didn't and she just got up and did other things while she waited for her programs to load

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 22:56:05 No.3434390 Report

Quoted By: >>3435714

>>3429058
Holy fuck I know exact what you mean.

>Parent's 'tech savvy' friend gives us his OLD OLD computer
>win98 in the age of win7
>Brings it over with a tonne of different AV programs
>Insists that each and every one is run every single time the computer is booted
>PC easily takes over 30 minutes to boot as the hdd is scanned about 3 times over before you can use it
>Teaches my young siblings to how to go about booting the PC and running all the programs
>The computer isn't even connected to the fucking internet, just to give to the kids
>I come over and see the kids going through this arduous process
>Kids absolutely insist it has to be done
>Speak to dad, "He knows a lot more about computers than you do, trust me"
>"What the fuck dad, you asked me if I could download a graphics card for you, what do you know"

Overly safe parents are as bad as oblivious toolbar-installing parents.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 22:58:26 No.3434413 Report

Quoted By:

>>3433532
>I only know lunix
>lunix
Aguant el bananero

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Aug 2012 23:21:44 No.3434644 Report

Quoted By:

>>3432015

How about fucking asking the client which books he wants exactly, you dumb idiot?

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 00:09:26 No.3435241 Report

Quoted By:

My mother cannot grasp the simplist concepts. I have to show her how to copy and paste every time she does it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 00:20:24 No.3435374 Report

Quoted By:

Is this thread autosaging now?

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 00:30:15 No.3435482 Report

Quoted By: >>3435707

>"Hey Anon, can you check this website for me?"
>"Sure Dad - in fact, why don't I show you how you can do it yourself?"
>Dad sits down at computer, I talk him through opening up the browser
>"Okay, see that white bar at the top with the writing in? Click on that with the little arrow... yep... okay, now type in your address"
>He begins to type: 127 Walnut Tree Crescent, Forest Town...

I lost my shit. I love my dad.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 00:50:20 No.3435707 Report

Quoted By:

>>3435482
lol

The way my mom acts around computers is...interesting. I think she becomes afraid she will break the computer, so she doesn't do anything she isn't familiar with. This is still better than a lot of people (who download stupid toolbars and stuff), though. She doesn't click anything unless she knows for sure what it is. It's so terrible watching her freeze up when opening e-mail attachments and trying to save them/figure out what program they're supposed to be opened in. For some reason, she has a lot of trouble navigating folders.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 00:50:46 No.3435714 Report

Quoted By:

>>3434390
at least it will instill dislike for PC in kids, thus keeping the net clean from cancer.
Because each year gives us even worse bastards than the last one.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 01:32:04 No.3436150 Report

Quoted By:

>>3432015
Bragging about it is honestly the only one mistake you made.

>Always hide my powerlevel in basic PC handling
>Feels good man

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1341894146882.jpg, 80KiB, 961x535

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 01:51:38 No.3436351 Report

Quoted By: >>3438571

guys archive this shit NAOW

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 02:53:14 No.3436936 Report

Quoted By: >>3442780

>Group presentations in school
>Always do the powerpoint myself
>Just type whatever shit everyone else researched in bullet format
>Use basic, decent looking template and simple animations
>Actually look at the powerpoint to make sure it looks good (no dark text on dark backgrounds, etc.)
>mfw I always get compliments on having an awesome powerpoint presentation

I don't know how everyone in my school used powerpoint regularly, yet still so many people sucked at it. Someone putting together a presentation that was actually pleasing to look at was rare.

Common issues include:
>Red text, especially on white background
>Boring layouts, black text with white background and no animation
>Sound effects, unless they are directly relevant to the presentation (either the sound would be off and they couldn't be heard, or the sound would be ear rapingly loud every single time)
>Animating a slide bullet point by bullet point without some sort of finishing cue, like reaching the bottom of the slide or having a picture (I always laugh at the dumbasses who skip to the next slide because they forget how many bullets there are)
>Finding the textured/gradient/pattern backgrounds and making every slide have psychedelic backgrounds
>That one jackass who would always set the animations by letter, so each slide took about 5 minutes to animate

How do people fuck up powerpoint so badly?

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 04:11:38 No.3437757 Report

Quoted By: >>3437762

The stories I've got mainly concern my dad as he used the computer most.

>Dad has some pictures on a camera
>He wants them on the computer
>Show him the simple procedure
>He clearly doesn't understand as he asks me to transfer pictures for him again later
>He always looked at me like I'd just split the atom with a butterknife when I showed him how to do it

>Speakers on computer are suddenly very quiet
>Dad complains to me of this
>Enter volume control, wave (or whatever it's called) is turned right down
>There is a note of true wonder and admiration in his voice when the speakers play at full volume again

>Dad randomly downloads Google Chrome
>A few days later, see him using IE
>"Why aren't you using Chrome?"
>Says he didn't like it because the 'toolbar that says "file" on it wasn't there

>The computer he uses is a 10+ year old desktop that was given to us second hand
>He insists that it is slow due to things I have downloaded (despite my not having used the machine for over 2 years)

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 04:12:25 No.3437762 Report

Quoted By:

>>3437757
My mother wasn't quite so bad but she still had her moments.

>Enters a very vague search term into Google
>Gets annoyed when the computer doesn't read her mind and present her with the information she wants immediatly
Honestly, I'd know when she was on the internet because she'd start huffing and puffing with frustration.

>Something fucks up as regards MS office on the computer
>Instead of just opening a document, it goes through this convoluted process of "installing" to ultimately do nothing
>I offer her a pirate copy of Office made for me by a friend
>"O...Ok, so I just put this in the disc drive?"
>"Yes, then follow the instructions.
>Some minutes pass
>She comes into my room with the disc
>"I stopped because it wanted my name and company"
>mfw she was scared away by the "registration" where you could enter your name as Tyrone Cocksmasher and nothing would happen
>mfw she still whines to me/ huffs and puffs angrily about office not working properly

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 05:28:29 No.3438514 Report

Quoted By:

>>3426484
>>the old pc's integrated nvidia motherboards graphics look better than this current dell's intel extreme shit

Well did you fix it and keep it?

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 05:35:51 No.3438571 Report

Quoted By:

>>3436351
Voting for archival has started:

http://chanarchive.org/request_votes

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 07:57:53 No.3439898 Report

Quoted By:

Bumpin'

bloxbloxniggerblox

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 08:16:33 No.3440055 Report

Quoted By:

>>3433532
>arch linux
>I only know lunix excuse
no son, all your hipster ass knows how to do is read a manual and follow very specific step by step instructions.
congratulations, your relationship to a tech guy is about the same as the relationship of someone who can assemple ikea shit, is to a carpenter

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 08:30:28 No.3440164 Report

Quoted By:

>"anon I need your help"
>what do you want?
>"I want to download a movie"
>do it
>again
>again
>again
>how about you do it yourself?
>"But-but I don't know how to do it"
For fucks sake, just use goddamn google and learn how to do it. How do think think I learned to do it in the first place?

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 08:52:11 No.3440373 Report

Quoted By:

>sister torrents shit
>her set-up is slow as shit
>she asks me if i'm downloading something
>i'm not
>she insists i am

ridic, yo.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 09:08:32 No.3440511 Report

Quoted By:

This isn't about computers. It's about cameras but same thing.

>Be reasonably ok at taking photos. Don't have a great camera because I prefer the low-quality gritty feel
>Dad promised this company that I'd take photos of this basketball team for him and they could put it on some advertisement
>Explain to him all the reasons why it wont work.
>In doors and shitty lighting = exposure time up = blurry pictures of people running
>Cheapo camera with almost non-existant zoom.
>Pictures turn out shit as expected.
>>"Anon, I think you need an eye test. These pictures are all blurry and too dark. I booked you one next week"
>>"Why didn't you just use the auto setting?"
>>"Also I bought my own camera ($50 K-mart DSLR ) so I can do it from now on"

10th Doctor

10th Doctor Thu 16 Aug 2012 10:21:57 No.3441118 Report

Quoted By:

>teach my mother how the use the Internet so fucking painful.
>she types everything out with one finger and it takes forever.
>30 min later she still doesn't understand how to use tabs, or log on to facebook or hotmail, even though I went over it many, many times.
>it's been months and she still doesn't know how to log in to her email "do I type it into here" (points to address bar) no mother you do this.
>still types with one finger

She's 56 and wasn't really educated on how to use a computer or the Internet and I get it's confusing for her and some older people but holy fuck it's so tedious.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 10:48:00 No.3441367 Report

Quoted By: >>3442564

>learns more about computers than average Canadian teen
>moves from one side of Canada to the other
>be considered most tech savvy student in school
>everyone is mentioning projects on their "Junk drives"
>junk drives
>had no idea what junk drives were, never heard term before
>be asked by teacher one day where my junk drive is
>"What's a junk drive"
>teacher pulls out a USB
>"Oh! That's a USB! You could of just said so."
>teacher doesn't know what I mean by USB
>get made fun of and was replaced by some fag who played WoW on the gaming laptop his mother bought him

Years later, in computer class at same school.
>doing stupid "Typing speed assesment"
>suddenly you hear some random classmate "I WON!"
>I already know that he won nothing, it's one of those stupid 1millionth user things
>everyone rushes him
>all congratulate him
>mfw

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 13:27:49 No.3442518 Report

Quoted By:

Every time the internet is a little bit slow
>Brother barges into my room
>"ARE YOU TORRENTING?"
>"...No?"
>"PUT A CAP ON YOUR TORRENTS"
>"I don't even have utorrent open, you fucking retard."
>"WHATEVER"
>Huffs his way out
>Look into his room later
>He has about 10 torrents downloading and about 50 more seeding
>every
>time

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 13:33:49 No.3442556 Report

Quoted By:

>go on TPB for the first time in years
>find a torrent
>the comments

oh dear god the comments

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 13:34:50 No.3442564 Report

Quoted By:

>>3441367
>teacher pulls out a USB
>"Oh! That's a USB! You could of just said so."

But that's fucking wrong.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 14:15:28 No.3442780 Report

Quoted By:

>>3436936
I know that feel.

When I did my military service, all the officers would do is fuck up powerpoints.

>be a rather boring day
>IT petty officer asks me to help him set up a beamer/laptop combination
>to be clear: guy knew his shit, just needed physical help due to back problems (he couldn't bow down, all the cables and plugs were on the ground)
>set up
>test run powerpoint
>powerpoint fucks up at first page
>bullets would look fucked up, come in the wrong order, etc...
>spend half an hour trying to find the error that was never there
>stupid officer doing the presentation tried to be funny

I admit, a little bit of retardation on our side, but who would've guessed that ALL of this was intentional?

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 14:17:05 No.3442792 Report

Quoted By: >>3442810

>>3434103

This reminded me of the time my grandma called DirecTV because the speakers quit working on her television.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 14:21:27 No.3442810 Report

Quoted By:

>>3442792
>tfw my grandma knows more about technology than me

I don't even know what the buttons on the tv remote do, she's out there zapping away changing channels, recording shows and shit.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 18:59:31 No.3444558 Report

Quoted By:

>Trying to teach Dad how to use tabs
>It's like trying to teach a bug to read a book.

Also
>Dad loves doing DIY house projects
>Loves that he can search the internet for videos on shit
>Instead of sticking to Youtube/Vimeo, he goes on these weird ass sites that constantly give him viruses
>Calls me to fix it all.

Mom
>Got a nook for Christmas
>I have one and she knows I pirate my books, so she constantly wants help
>Think about teaching her how to do it, but she'd fuck up so I just do it.

Same with music. I have to download both of them music because they can't understand how. And they don't want full albums either.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Aug 2012 19:38:56 No.3444779 Report

Quoted By:

>friend leaving for grad school soon
>hanging out at his house, he shows me his new laptop
>macbook
>"Now I can't get viruses"

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