8 July 2011
Authorities say that a young girl named Rose Elizabeth Kelly-Lines has been murdered in her residence. Witnesses say they saw a legion of fat neckbeards wearing Richard Dawkins t-shirts charging into the residency at approximately 3 am, wielding cameras and pick axes while trying to wipe the profuse amount of grease and sweat that they were drowning in.
Rose's mother and her friends are shocked at this act. Many believe that it is a hate crime against Christians.
"She was always a devout Christian," her friend Harriet told the press, "We would always go to church together every day and pray to God to castrate as many atheists as possible."
This seemingly random hate crime against Christians has been traced to a hacker source called "Anonymous", a dangerous terrorist organization composed of internet vigilantes. As of now, there have been talks of Christian rebels attacking their base, 4chan, and raping their dear leader 'moot'. More of this story at 8.