With Osama bin Laden dead and a roster space to fill, Al Qaeda has announced the signing of free agent starter Kevin Millwood to a one year, five goat deal. Millwood, who opted out of his contract with the Yankees on Sunday, will take bin Laden's spot in the rotation.

Baseball analysts were enthusiastic of the move, with Ken Rosenthal opining that "Millwood will fit right in with the rest of Al Qaeda, since he's used to getting bombed."