Update 2024-03-27: Greatly expanded the "Samples" page and renamed it to "Glossary".
Update 2024-04-04: Added 5 million mid-2011 posts from the k47 post dump. Browse (mostly) them here.
Update 2024-04-07: Added ~400 October 2003 posts from 4chan.net. Browse them here.

Welcome to Oldfriend Archive, the official 4chan archive of the NSA. Hosting ~170M text-only 2003-2014 4chan posts (mostly 2006-2008).
[3 / 1 / ?]

No.15824474 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
In honor of the arrival of Kenneth Bragnah's "Thor", here's the Plot summary of Matthew Vaughn's unfilmed "Thor" movie, written by Mark Protesvich.

Thor, Loki, Balder, Volstagg, Fandral and Hogun are sent by Odin to Svartalfheim to buy weapons made by Ivaldi, the king of the gnome blacksmiths, for Asgard's ongoing war against the Frost Giants of Jotunheim. They are attacked by a band of giants led by a female named Ram and Thor saves Ivaldi's life. In retribuition, Ivaldi promises to make the Mjolnir for Thor. Meanwhile, Loki discovers that he is a descendant from the Frost Giants.

In Asgard, Loki asks a sorceress called Karnilla to show him the truth, and discovers that Odin killed his father, Ymir, to reclaim the Gungnir, a magic spear made by Ivaldi to Ymir, that could be passed on to Thor. Infuriated, Loki manipulates Thor into believing that Balder plans to take his place as Odin's heir, manipulates Balder into believing that Thor plans to take over the Nine Realms, and manipulates Odin into believing that Thor will betray him.

When Mjolnir arrives, Thor is overwhelmed by its power and kills Balder with it. Odin, infuriated, banishes Thor to Midgard, but Ivaldi, thinking that Thor was set up, sends Mjolnir there as well, disguised as a stick and protected by an enchantment that allows only the man who wields it to reclaim Thor's power.