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Analyzing Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 06:54:00 No.19080342 View View Reply Original Report

Quoted By: >>19080361

bed-ridden for twenty years, demands tobacco

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 06:55:00 No.19080361 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080342

Simpler times son.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 06:57:00 No.19080390 Report

Quoted By: >>19080580

>Veruca Salt
>wins contest to go to sugar factory

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 06:57:00 No.19080397 Report

Quoted By: >>19080408

He shouldn't have been able to get out of bed in the first place. Twenty fucking years, jesus.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 06:57:00 No.19080402 Report

Quoted By: >>19080426

too bad all of them should have looked like this

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 06:58:00 No.19080408 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080397

He obviously snuck out for smokes all the time.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 06:59:00 No.19080415 Report

Quoted By: >>19080434 >>19080474

Chocolate rivers wouldn't look like that. It'd be richer and thicker, and not so watery.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 06:59:00 No.19080420 Report

Quoted By:

more like how could he walk around that huge ass factory all day, seriously what the hell

!KaijiFcZK.

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!KaijiFcZK. Mon 24 Oct 2011 06:59:00 No.19080421 Report

Quoted By: >>19080448

the remake had much much cuter kids, I wonder why that is.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:00:00 No.19080426 Report

Quoted By: >>19080443

>>19080402

Life has been pretty hard on you recently, hasn't it?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:00:00 No.19080434 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080415

It's Wonka chocolate bitch, it defies candy phyiscs!

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:00:00 No.19080441 Report

Quoted By:

It must have been a mental fear to leave the bed

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:00:00 No.19080443 Report

Quoted By: >>19080476

>>19080426
picture of bedsores

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:01:00 No.19080448 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080421
It's because you've got bad taste.

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

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FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:02:00 No.19080466 Report

Quoted By: >>19080485 >>19080486 >>19080505

Willy Wonka gives away chocolate

STOP EVERYTHING

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:03:00 No.19080474 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080415
It could be watered down chocolate.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:03:00 No.19080476 Report

Quoted By: >>19080488

>>19080443

Instead of making edgy posts I'd really rather you internalize all your anger.

Then you might hopefully flip out and hurt yourself.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:03:00 No.19080485 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080466

You don't understand that shit was like free legal meth!

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:03:00 No.19080486 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080466
Shit, if I were a teacher and a real life Willy Wonka did a golden ticket giveaway, I'd cancel the rest of the semester.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:04:00 No.19080488 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080476
theres no anger, just saying if you lay on a bed for 30 years, youd have tons of bedsores

no idea why you mad

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:05:00 No.19080505 Report

Quoted By: >>19080545

>>19080466

>teacher cant' figure out the percentage for 2 out of 1000

>makes students mix dangerous chemicals without any kind of protective gear

Between that and his Wonka boner, that guy was a fucking maniac.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:05:00 No.19080515 Report

Quoted By:

>I haven't done this in 20 years!
>GRANDPA!

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:05:00 No.19080520 Report

Quoted By:

>this thread

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:06:00 No.19080529 Report

Quoted By: >>19080570 >>19080591

>Veruca Salt

The original tsundere

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:07:00 No.19080540 Report

Quoted By: >>19080566 >>19080573

If Grandpa was bedridden, how the flying fuck did he have that chocolate to give to Charlie at night?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:07:00 No.19080545 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080505
Yeah, wasn't he handling nytroglycerine around the kids? And he'd always go off on nonsensical tangents. Dude was a psychopath.

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

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FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:07:00 No.19080547 Report

Quoted By:

...

!KaijiFcZK.

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!KaijiFcZK. Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:08:00 No.19080556 Report

Quoted By:

I'd do violet

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:08:00 No.19080566 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080540

Charlie's mother bought it, grandpa took the credit

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:08:00 No.19080570 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080529

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julie_Dawn_Cole

>Cole loves being asked about her two children. "Whenever Holly (her daughter) said or did anything brattish, I'd just go, 'Is there a problem, Veruca? Can I help you?' That always snapped her out of it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:08:00 No.19080573 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080540
I assumed he gave some money to the mother and she went out and bought it for him, the way she did for his tobacco.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:09:00 No.19080580 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080390

this guy gets it

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:09:00 No.19080590 Report

Quoted By: >>19080620 >>19080622 >>19080635 >>19080638

>win tickets for amazing once-in-a-lifetime trip

>offer to take your useless bedridden grandpa instead of your mom, who has been working her ass off in a fucking medieval laundry just to scrape by

That was an asshole move, Charlie. I mean, you offer to take the guy who is PHYSICALLY INCAPABLE of going over the woman who has basically given her whole life just so the family can survive?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:09:00 No.19080591 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080529
you can't be tsundere without any dere, retard.

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

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FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:11:00 No.19080615 Report

Quoted By: >>19080656 >>19080660

Did they just waste the chocolate?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:11:00 No.19080620 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080590

Well shit if she left WHO WAS GONNA TAKE CARE OF GRANDPA AND BUY HIS TOBACCO, COME ON SON!!

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:12:00 No.19080622 Report

Quoted By: >>19080637 >>19080662

>>19080590
>Forgetting there are 3 of elderly people in the mother's care

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:12:00 No.19080631 Report

Quoted By:

Did they all just circle jerk with each other using their own filth as lube in the bed?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:12:00 No.19080635 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080590

Yeah, I always had a problem with that.

I mean, who the hell was doing laundry like that in the fucking 70s? I can't imagine the "boiling vat and giant wooden spork" system was still in favor.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:13:00 No.19080637 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080622
other not of

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:13:00 No.19080638 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080590
Well, they all got to go live at the factory at the end of the movie, so it's not so bad.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:15:00 No.19080656 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080615

Yesssssssss?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:15:00 No.19080657 Report

Quoted By: >>19080683

How long were they in the bed for anyway? 20 years? I'd say they were all about in their 70s as well, why the fuck did they stop working in their 50's?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:15:00 No.19080660 Report

Quoted By: >>19080676

>>19080615
Yup, probably dumped it in a huge landfill with the rest of the discarded Wonka bars.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:15:00 No.19080662 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080622

We're talking about a 1-day visit to a local factory. I'm sure if they can survive while she's at work they would have been fine for a day on their own. Or she could just get someone to look in on them.

What concerns me is the bit when Grandpa references Charlie asking about how guns worked. Given the horrifyingly depressing living conditions he has, I wouldn't be surprised if he wanted to take the dead weight out.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:16:00 No.19080676 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080660

Veruca demanded he pay the workers to take boxes of the chocolate to food kitchens and eat it in front of the homeless.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:16:00 No.19080679 Report

Quoted By: >>19080698 >>19080704

So what was up with the weird boat ride?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:17:00 No.19080683 Report

Quoted By: >>19080711

>>19080657
Good for nothing lazy fuckers, all of them.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:17:00 No.19080689 Report

Quoted By: >>19080712 >>19080731 >>19080742

So....Wonka keeps a guy on staff for the sole purpose of imitating a rival candymaker?

Seems like a limited career path.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:18:00 No.19080698 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080679
Wonka is secretly the Devil, he was taking them lower and lower into hell.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:18:00 No.19080704 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080679
Wonka needed to know what the kids' screams sounded like, so he can rape the cutest voice later

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:18:00 No.19080711 Report

Quoted By: >>19080746 >>19080771

>>19080683

My theory is that it was an orgy that went horribly wrong, and they all got bedridden at once.

It's nothing but handjobs and footjobs under those covers.

Even worse, Charlie's mom has to wash the waste products off those sheets every night at her job so the house doesn't smell of elderly genital excretions.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:19:00 No.19080712 Report

Quoted By: >>19080740

>>19080689
Slugworth was probably just part time, seeing how he only appeared when the factory announced the contest.

Or he could be a financial advisor who played the role.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:20:00 No.19080731 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080689
"Slugworth" was actually two Oompa-Loompas in a man suit.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:21:00 No.19080740 Report

Quoted By: >>19081060

>>19080712

Wonka doesn't seem like a guy that hires anyone part time, given the fact that the world's never heard of Oompa Loompas. If he hires non-Oompa employees like Slugworth, then he probably only did it because he completely trusts them not to expose his secrets.

Maybe Slugworth is Wonka's boyfriend? Given all the "half a man" decor, maybe Wonka has gender-image issues.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:21:00 No.19080742 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080689
it's like L from Death Note. Of the top 3 detectives in the world, he was secretly all 3 of them.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:21:00 No.19080746 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080711

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:23:00 No.19080771 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080711

>Even worse, Charlie's mom has to wash the waste products off those sheets every night at her job so the house doesn't smell of elderly genital excretions.

Why would you do this

Now I can't help but imagine how bad the old people funk must be in that cramped rat-infested house.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:24:00 No.19080784 Report

Quoted By: >>19080799 >>19081060

Do you think the Oompa Loompas are incapable of regular speech and must sing everything they ever want to vocalize?

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

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FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:24:00 No.19080791 Report

Quoted By: >>19080807 >>19080818 >>19080828

"you like the killin's, huh?"

"WHAT DO YOU THINK LIFE'S ALL ABOUT?!"

*pulls out toy gun*

I bet became a hitman.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:25:00 No.19080799 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080784

Oompa-Loompas are like ants or bees...they have a hive mentality that makes them only communicate in unison.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:25:00 No.19080802 Report

Quoted By: >>19080812 >>19080819 >>19080827 >>19080833 >>19080866 >>19080897

If Wonka planned on the tickets going to random children. How on Earth was Slugworth able to travel to each destination just in time for the press conference.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:25:00 No.19080807 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080791

Even worse, he grew up to become Quentin Tarantino.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:26:00 No.19080812 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080802

Eagles

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:26:00 No.19080818 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080791
World's Tiniest Hitman.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:27:00 No.19080819 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080802
it's a play on words. Slugworth possesses super speed

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

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FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:27:00 No.19080822 Report

Quoted By: >>19080838 >>19080880 >>19080914

sit on Wonka Bar all day, give it to Charlie

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:27:00 No.19080827 Report

Quoted By: >>19080849 >>19080889

>>19080802

It's because the whole contest was a sham.

Wonka was using his membership to SEELE to get access to the Marduk Report. He used the information to locate the best children candidates to pilot his Wonkagelions.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:27:00 No.19080828 Report

Quoted By: >>19080878 >>19081060

>>19080791
His IMDB trivia:

>Has backpacked to 60 countries on 6 continents.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:27:00 No.19080831 Report

Quoted By:

Who doesn't like to smoke a nice cigar, or a pipe full of tobacco every now and then?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:27:00 No.19080833 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080802
Wonka's obviously a wizard, he probably magicked him to each place.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:28:00 No.19080838 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080822

"Oh thanks Grandpa, a candy bar melted by your ass heat that smells like farts."

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:28:00 No.19080842 Report

Quoted By: >>19080872

A chocolate lake sounds wildly impractical, aren't there microbes in the air?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:29:00 No.19080849 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080827

So instead of turning us into Tang, Third Impact is going to turn us into caramel?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:29:00 No.19080866 Report

Quoted By: >>19080897

>>19080802
This. Also, how the fuck did he know Charlie would be taking the bridge part home due to being mobbed by a excited crowd?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:30:00 No.19080872 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080842

Wonka filled the lake with anti-microbial nanomachines.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:30:00 No.19080878 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080828
so the fucker just sprinted there?

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:30:00 No.19080880 Report

Quoted By: >>19080891

>>19080822
Fuck, I didn't even think about that. The chocolate was probably marinating all day in a mixture of ass/old man ball sweat and gangrenous bedsores.

Xenos

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Xenos Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:31:00 No.19080889 Report

Quoted By: >>19080898

>>19080827
Asuka.. is now a viant blueberry.. Er.. Giant cranberry

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:31:00 No.19080891 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080880

Not to mention whatever excrement he didn't scrape into his bedpan and the dried semen from the handjobs.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:32:00 No.19080897 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080802
>>19080866
Wonka could have easily placed a homing device in each ticket and sent Slugworth after each as he sent them into the world one by one

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:32:00 No.19080898 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080889

Ironically, she would soon fall into a gigantic lava furnace while trying to get to an Angel egg.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:34:00 No.19080910 Report

Quoted By:

The gambler from Paraguay should have appeared as the movie's villain, breaking into the tour and murdering Oompa-Loompas.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:34:00 No.19080911 Report

Quoted By: >>19080931 >>19081046

What was the point in him fooling his family by saying he got the ticket when he opened his birthday present?

Why didn't he sell the ticket for thousands to afford a new house, appliances and clothes for his family?

How did Wonka get away with slave labor?

Why were the grandparents okay with sitting on their asses all day watching Charlie's mom work?

Who were the other two grandparents? Were they Charlie's dads parents? Why are they still there if the Dad left the family?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:34:00 No.19080914 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080822
it wasn't even chocolate. He saved the wrapper from the first bar, scraped up some of his own shit, pressed it flat and reused the wrapper

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:37:00 No.19080931 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080911

1) He's a dumb kid and wanted a reaction.

2) He probably would have if his grandpa hadn't been so gung-ho about going.

3) There are way more Oompas than there are of him, so a slave revolt may be in the near future. Either that, or maybe Wonka has his own Geofront where the Oompas enjoy their own civilization when they're on break.

4) What the hell else can they do? They're fucking bedridden.

5) Charlie's dad died in Vietnam.

4)

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

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FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:37:00 No.19080932 Report

Quoted By: >>19080939 >>19080940 >>19080956 >>19081131

has braces, eats "about a hundred" wonka bars

unless....those aren't braces

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:38:00 No.19080939 Report

Quoted By: >>19080946

>>19080932
that kid on the right is dead inside

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:38:00 No.19080940 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080932

Bulimic girl is bulimic.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:38:00 No.19080946 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080939

He already got molested by the crazy teacher.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:39:00 No.19080956 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080932
She bought a hundred, never said she ate them.

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

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FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:40:00 No.19080966 Report

Quoted By: >>19080975 >>19080982 >>19081018

sings and gives away free candy at the beginning of the film, makes Charlie pay

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:41:00 No.19080975 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080966
POOR PEOPLE ARE SCUM

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:42:00 No.19080982 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080966

He knows Charlie is poor, and that you don't give poor people free shit because it'll make them leech off of you and hurt the business.

Give free candy to the kids that can afford to come back every day, not the poor faggot that can buy something once every four years.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:43:00 No.19080993 Report

Quoted By: >>19081019

Was Wonka aware that his contest caused billions of chocolate bars to be completely wasted by selfish, greedy people? He even allows Veruca in, despite her not actually finding the ticket herself or giving any fucks about the countless bars she wasted. To spend so much time to create the best tasting chocolate and other candies, then allow all his hard work to get shit all over by everyone just looking for a ticket

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:43:00 No.19080999 Report

Quoted By: >>19081036 >>19081038

So how the hell did Grandpa know all about the story of Wonka and the spies? Was he a former law enforcement agent, or was he just involved in the corporate espionage scene?

Also, WHAT WAS THE FUCKING POINT OF THE SCENE WITH THE KNIFE GUY, SERIOUSLY?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:45:00 No.19081018 Report

Quoted By: >>19081033

>>19080966
The rich kids probably have a tab

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:46:00 No.19081019 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080993

Not to mention all the cocoa child-slave pickers that were worked to death by the increased demand.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:47:00 No.19081033 Report

Quoted By: >>19081057

>>19081018

>tab at a candy shop

What fucking country was this movie set in? It's clearly not America, but shit like this makes me think it's not Britain either.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:47:00 No.19081036 Report

Quoted By: >>19081049

>>19080999
What's this scene with the knife guy? I don't remember it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:47:00 No.19081038 Report

Quoted By: >>19081058

>>19080999
Grandpa worked in the factory.

>Also, WHAT WAS THE FUCKING POINT OF THE SCENE WITH THE KNIFE GUY, SERIOUSLY?
I NEED TO KNOW THIS

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

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FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:47:00 No.19081041 Report

Quoted By: >>19082561

fucken faker

we all know he was sneaking out buying tobacco and wonka bars

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:48:00 No.19081046 Report

Quoted By:

>>19080911
>What was the point in him fooling his family by saying he got the ticket when he opened his birthday present?

to give the illusion that he was happy even if he didnt win

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:48:00 No.19081049 Report

Quoted By: >>19081083 >>19081101

>>19081036

Early in the movie, where Charlie stops by the factory gates at dusk. A weird dude with a cart full of knives says some poetry and then walks away.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:48:00 No.19081057 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081033
>not having a tab at a candy shop
Sorry you were poor.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:48:00 No.19081058 Report

Quoted By: >>19081082 >>19081088

>>19081038

If that's the case, why didn't Wonka recognize him? He should have at least acknowledged the former employee.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:49:00 No.19081060 Report

Quoted By: >>19081071

>>19080740
>Given all the "half a man" decor, maybe Wonka has gender-image issues.

I always figured he was divorced. From his wife, not reality. Well, both. She took half of everything, he goes off into the wild to get away from it all, finds the Oompa-Loompas, becomes their king, leads them to civilization to bring it down with sweets.

>>19080784
I've read that some people with aphasia of varying degrees (from muteness to stutters) have no trouble singing clearly. Something to do with using different neural channels, or somesuch.

>>19080828

The perfect cover.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:50:00 No.19081071 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081060

With all that velvet and the flashy bowties, there's no way in hell Wonka was straight.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:50:00 No.19081075 Report

Quoted By: >>19081100 >>19081120

In the original run of the book, the oompa-loompas were blacks from africa.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:51:00 No.19081082 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081058
Would you acknowledge someone doing grunt work if you owned a company?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:51:00 No.19081083 Report

Quoted By: >>19081090 >>19082370

>>19081049
It's been a long time since I've seen the movie, what does the guy actually say to Charlie?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:51:00 No.19081088 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081058
There was no way Wonka knew every single person working at his factory back when they worked there, let alone several decades later.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:51:00 No.19081090 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081083
something about, "no one goes in, no one comes out"

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO charoompa1.gif, 39KiB, 300x164

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:53:00 No.19081100 Report

Quoted By: >>19081120

>>19081075

It was almost a rap film.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:53:00 No.19081101 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081049
It was to build upon the fact that Wonka's factory is a very mysterious place that is talked about all around town from school classrooms, at home, and random bums on the street.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:53:00 No.19081102 Report

Quoted By:

Obligatory for this thread:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gsE0UOz1uw4

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:53:00 No.19081107 Report

Quoted By: >>19081127

Grandpa didn't have to be an employee to know about Wonka competing with his rival Slugworth. Slugworth is another candy company (though Wonka reveals he owns it, too), so it's common knowledge to adults.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:54:00 No.19081120 Report

Quoted By: >>19081145

>>19081075
>>19081100

>In the version first published, [the Oompa–Loompas were] a tribe of 3,000 amiable black pygmies who have been imported by Mr. Willy Wonka from 'the very deepest and darkest part of the African jungle where no white man had been before.' Mr. Wonka keeps them in the factory, where they have replaced the sacked white workers. Wonka's little slaves are delighted with their new circumstances, and particularly with their diet of chocolate. Before they lived on green caterpillars, beetles, eucalyptus leaves, 'and the bark of the bong–bong tree.

This version sounds way better.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:55:00 No.19081125 Report

Quoted By:

>Willy Wonka
>billionaire businessman goes to a third world country and brings back colored people to work for him
>lays off entire workforce and gives jobs to foreigners
>local economy crashes as hundreds or thousands are without jobs
>many are poor, just like charlie
>charlie is probably poor because of Wonka
>justifies it to a child by saying the workers are better off being indentured servants

>invites a bunch of children to a dangerous factory with no railings, warning signs, or safety equipment (other than goggles and clean-suits)

>factory is just a series of fun house rides and set-pieces, there's no actual production going on

>make children enter a binding legal contract that signs away liability in case of injury
>all children but one almost die

What the fuck is this shit?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:55:00 No.19081127 Report

Quoted By: >>19081146 >>19081178 >>19081199

>>19081107
So it can be inferred that Wonka has a monopoly on the chocolate/candy industry. Robber Baron scum, why hadn't the government intervened?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:55:00 No.19081131 Report

Quoted By: >>19081203

>>19080932
Gee, kids in those days sure were creepy looking. Long faced, dead eyed fuckers, all of em.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:56:00 No.19081137 Report

Quoted By: >>19081155 >>19081172

Bean feast
>Cream buns
>Doughnuts
>Fruitcake with no nuts

what the fuck is a bean feast

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO vanity_cat.jpg, 90KiB, 694x642

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:56:00 No.19081145 Report

Quoted By: >>19082034

>>19081120

>the very deepest and darkest part of the African jungle where no white man had been before.

London?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:56:00 No.19081146 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081127

Why do you hate the job creators? If you're poor, it's your own fault. Don't look for a government handout!*

*this message brought to you by the commission to elect Herman Cain

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:57:00 No.19081153 Report

Quoted By: >>19081170 >>19081204

I think the knife guy was just a throw away character to give more info about the Wonka factory. "Nobody ever goes in, nobody ever comes out". A cart full of knives adds to the creep factor

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:57:00 No.19081155 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081137

I think it's a sexual term, like a rainbow party.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:58:00 No.19081170 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081153

I bet he was another guy planted by Wonka as an undercover security guard.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:58:00 No.19081172 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081137
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bean_feast

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 07:59:00 No.19081178 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081127
Governments don't know, and Wonka/Slugworth put on a good show so the public thinks they are bitter rivals.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1282291512333.jpg, 138KiB, 500x500

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:00:00 No.19081193 Report

Quoted By:

Willy Wonka:
>Racist
>Robber Baron
>Delusional
>Paranoid
>Bipolar
>Anti-social
>OCD

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:00:00 No.19081199 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081127

Wonka is actually pulling the strings behind the prime minister. He's the one really running the country.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:01:00 No.19081203 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081131
>kids in those days

That is every classroom in England today

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:01:00 No.19081204 Report

Quoted By: >>19081218 >>19081250 >>19081551

>>19081153
its just a knife vendor. trying to sell to anyone that walked by or walking between meat vendors

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:02:00 No.19081218 Report

Quoted By: >>19081248 >>19081905

>>19081204

I think we can file that one under "jobs that really should not logically exist" right next to Charlie's mom's denim-boiling position.

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Fa (...).jpg, 35KiB, 640x368

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:03:00 No.19081240 Report

Quoted By:

"SAW THIS IN A MOVIE ONCE. GUY SIGNED HIS WIFE'S INSURANCE POLICY, THEN HE BUMPED HER OFF."

cool story, Mike

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO OH MY GOD.jpg, 99KiB, 382x363

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:03:00 No.19081248 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081218

>>denim-boiling

No one tell Frank or Charlie

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:03:00 No.19081250 Report

Quoted By: >>19081551

>>19081204
He's clearly selling knives to potential muggers.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:03:00 No.19081251 Report

Quoted By:

jesus /tv/ you made my night with this, can we get this shit archived?

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Fa (...).jpg, 52KiB, 640x368

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:09:00 No.19081321 Report

Quoted By:

leaves a bunch of unwrapped candy lying around exposed to the elements, feeds it to children

good thing they signed that contract

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:10:00 No.19081325 Report

Quoted By: >>19081393 >>19081442

Okay, this has always bugged me...WHY was everyone so nuts about winning the contest?

I mean, a visit to a factory is about the lamest prize I can think of. Even if you get some free swag (like a lifetime supply of chocolate), no one knows all the crazy shit that's in the factory.

As far as the world knows, it's no different than your standard food-processing facility. Factories are not fucking whimsical or exciting, they're boring. Why do they go batshit crazy over the opportunity to visit? Is the fucking Virgin Mary buried there?

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO fuckingrandpa.jpg, 43KiB, 500x634

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:14:00 No.19081379 Report

Quoted By:

Scumbag Grandpa Joe

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:15:00 No.19081393 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081325
I believe the story takes place in a universe where Wonka is the richest man alive, and several countries have candy-based economies. Wonka is also notoriously eccentric, wacky, and overly secretive, so getting a look at what he does to make such amazing candies is many children's and manchildren's wet dreams, as well as greedy people wanting to steal secret to sell to rivals'.

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Fa (...).jpg, 41KiB, 640x368

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:17:00 No.19081427 Report

Quoted By: >>19081439

"Spitting's a dirty habit!"

"I know a worse one."

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:18:00 No.19081439 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081427

He's clearly referring to swallowing.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO mfw1.jpg, 5KiB, 225x225

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:19:00 No.19081442 Report

Quoted By: >>19081455

>>19081325
>mfw everyone was on LSD the whole time and the factory was just an empty warehouse

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:20:00 No.19081453 Report

Quoted By: >>19081503

I always wondered what would have happened if Veruca or even Violet would have just held back their compulsions until the end, after Charlie gets disqualified. Would Wonka really have given the whole factory to Veruca, or would her lasting until the end just change his contest into being only a tour and he'd try again in a few years.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:20:00 No.19081455 Report

Quoted By: >>19081487 >>19081488

>>19081442

Actually, the knife vendor stabbed Charlie early in the movie. The rest of the film happened in Charlie's dying brain as he bled out in front of the factory gates.

Childish Gambinbro !!cNAt3V6vA1S

Childish Gambinbro !!cNAt3V6vA1S Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:21:00 No.19081461 Report

Quoted By:

Grandpa Joe looks like honkey Gadhafi.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:22:00 No.19081487 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081455

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:22:00 No.19081488 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081455
oh god my sides

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:23:00 No.19081501 Report

Quoted By:

I'm amazed that his attempted murders of Germans and Americans didn't draw international sanctions.

Hans Blix should have come to visit his factory to ensure he wasn't enriching his chocolate.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:23:00 No.19081503 Report

Quoted By: >>19081516 >>19081583

>>19081453
>>19081453
He knew that Charlie was going to win from the time he was born. Wonka could have taken him out of poverty, but the road to his birthday present to the Wonka factory was supposed to lead him down a road of nobility.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:24:00 No.19081516 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081503

Oh my God...

WONKA IS CHARLIE'S REAL FATHER

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1318226703726.png, 220KiB, 414x422

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:25:00 No.19081528 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081510

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1315537521520.jpg, 32KiB, 442x447

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:25:00 No.19081529 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081510

I know there's a 'v' in /tv/, but c'mon man

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Fa (...).jpg, 36KiB, 640x368

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:25:00 No.19081533 Report

Quoted By:

"boy, that's great stuff'

So THAT'S why the factory is top secret.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO harry_potter_ginny_kiss_deathly_ (...).jpg, 80KiB, 879x557

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:25:00 No.19081542 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081510

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:27:00 No.19081551 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081250
>>19081204
England has tuns of knife crime, so justifiably tons of knives.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:27:00 No.19081555 Report

Quoted By: >>19081577 >>19081590

If Wonka never leaves the factory, then does he have his own personal Oompa-Loompa doctor?

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:28:00 No.19081577 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081555
and Oompa-Loompa concubines

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1285911378948.jpg, 48KiB, 294x294

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:29:00 No.19081583 Report

Quoted By: >>19081677

>>19081503
so if Wonka knew Charlie would win from the start, he knowingly tortured and mentally scarred those other children and their parents just for laughs. They'll come out of the factory talking about little orange men and magic candy and get themselves institutionalized

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:29:00 No.19081590 Report

Quoted By: >>19081604

>>19081555
he never gets sick
he onlyy wanted an heir in case he died while flying around in his great glass elevator

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:30:00 No.19081604 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081590
he clearly attained godhood and wanted to shed his mortal body so as to ascend into the heavens and explore the universe

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:31:00 No.19081610 Report

Quoted By: >>19081657 >>19081743

If I remember correctly, Wonka had Geese that produced solid gold eggs. Perhaps he used this unlimited supply of gold to acquire reins on the world economy. He would be able to lower or raise the price of it at will?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:35:00 No.19081657 Report

Quoted By: >>19081685 >>19081693 >>19081697

>>19081610
he also was able to make everlasting gobstoppers, a food that never ran out, meaning he cured world hunger

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:36:00 No.19081677 Report

Quoted By: >>19081699 >>19081715

>>19081583
I've always liked to believe that the various children were scared straight and became better people for it. Augustus becomes sick at the thought of chocolate and cuts back on sweets to become thinner like he felt in the tubes, Violet develops a fear/hatred of gum and never chews it anymore, Veruca realizes she's a bad person and tries to be better, though Mike probably still loves TV, he tries hard to become a real TV star and becomes an actor

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:36:00 No.19081685 Report

Quoted By: >>19081782

>>19081657

>implying they have actual nutritional value

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:37:00 No.19081693 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081657
I don't think people can survive on candy alone.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1319315499220.png, 156KiB, 331x352

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:37:00 No.19081697 Report

Quoted By: >>19081720 >>19081909 >>19082199

>>19081657
if they were truly everlasting then swallowing one would mean that it would have to be removed by means of surgery, correct? A service that most of the world can't seem to afford due to the severe amount of greed that wonka seems to have.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:37:00 No.19081699 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081677
Mike probably just became a tripfag and posts on /tv/ all day

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:38:00 No.19081715 Report

Quoted By: >>19081738 >>19081749 >>19081830

>>19081677

I don't get what was so bad about Violet's love of gum. Sure, it was annoying, but it was hardly a crippling personality problem (like Veruca's spoiled nature, Augustus' gluttony or Mike's violent streak).

She's not hurting herself OR others with her habit.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:39:00 No.19081720 Report

Quoted By: >>19081761

>>19081697
no, you'd just eventually shit out a gobstopper

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:40:00 No.19081738 Report

Quoted By: >>19081765

>>19081715
Her whole life revolved around it, this can be seen when in the news interview she starts going off about her record and the records of her friends. Maybe the gum represented chewing tobacco?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:41:00 No.19081743 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081610

I'm sure he could make a killing doing weapons development. The army would give a fortune for those drinks that can make their soldiers fly.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:41:00 No.19081749 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081715
constant gum chewing messes up your teeth, and she was missing out on regular child activities by being so concerned with chewing her gum, which gave her a snotty attitude

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:42:00 No.19081761 Report

Quoted By: >>19081849

>>19081720
If it never digested, wouldn't it just stay in the stomach? it was a pretty large sized candy too.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:43:00 No.19081765 Report

Quoted By: >>19081800

>>19081738

None of that is self-harming, though. She's a kid, and kids love to obsess over stupid stuff. I was the same way with dinosaurs. Other kids are into trains, or cowboys, or ballerina dancing.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:43:00 No.19081782 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081685
>implying calories aren't a value of candy
>implying hungry people can't use calories

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Fa (...).jpg, 35KiB, 640x368

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:44:00 No.19081784 Report

Quoted By: >>19081823

Grandpa Joe: "welp, Mr. Salt finally got what he wanted"
Charlie: "what's that?"
Grandpa Joe: "Veruca went first"

must be that nicotine withdrawal

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:44:00 No.19081791 Report

Quoted By: >>19081806

Why did Willy Wonka (a republican) let poor people inside his factory? that's against the republic ideology

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:45:00 No.19081798 Report

Quoted By:

The original is so much better that the remake should be erased from history.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:45:00 No.19081800 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081765
it was giving her a speech impediment
alos, she ate the first gum she saw with complete disregard for her health. he saved her from getting roofied by roofie gum

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:45:00 No.19081806 Report

Quoted By: >>19081827

>>19081791

>implying he's not running the Oompa-Loompa civilization as a communist dictatoriship

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:46:00 No.19081823 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081784

Grandpa was just upset he couldn't get any of the girls to suck his dick.

I mean, it was the first day in 20 years he's away from his wife, so he's got to try and get laid while he can, right?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:47:00 No.19081827 Report

Quoted By: >>19081846

>>19081806
>communist dictatorship
So all the Oompas were getting free healthcare, education, food, housing and clothing?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:47:00 No.19081830 Report

Quoted By: >>19081861 >>19082041

>>19081715
didn't the Oompa Loompas sing a song about why gum chewing is bad?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:49:00 No.19081846 Report

Quoted By: >>19081917

>>19081827

They were all getting equal levels of those things for free, in that there were none of those for any of them.

It's clearly not a capitalistic society, because what the fuck would they do with money? It's not like they could go out and spend it, and the internet didn't exist yet.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:49:00 No.19081849 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081761

That's not how it works. You shit out food that had stuff taken out by your body. If you swallowed a marble, you'd shit out a marble. Your body doesn't digest marbles. You'd shit out the gobstopper too. Stuff just moves through your bowels, your body doesn't hold it until it's all absorbed.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:49:00 No.19081861 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081830
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DVh7LxljFKA

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Fa (...).jpg, 35KiB, 640x368

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:50:00 No.19081863 Report

Quoted By: >>19081878 >>19081891 >>19081913

You wouldn't download a Wonka Bar.

Seriously though, he'd probably use some encryption. Without the right key, it'd probably give you AIDS.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Bald disbelief.jpg, 10KiB, 250x250

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:51:00 No.19081878 Report

Quoted By: >>19081911

>>19081863

>2011

>Not pirating your candy

ISHYGDDT

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:52:00 No.19081891 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081863

Total supervillain technology.

Take one big nuke and turn it into millions of little ones all across the country.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO veruca-salt-2.jpg, 26KiB, 300x200

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:53:00 No.19081905 Report

Quoted By: >>19081922 >>19081934

>>19081218
>implying shitty denim processing jobs don't exist

http://www.oxfam.org.au/blogs/2011/03/jeans-sandblastingand-the-real-fashions-real-victims/

on a related note, who else wanted to fuck Veruca Salt when they first watched the movie as a kid?

>dem budding breasts

inb4 pedo - 12yo boy wanting 12yo girl isn't pedo

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:53:00 No.19081909 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081697

No, it'd just come out your ass. Have you ever seen a digestive system?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:53:00 No.19081911 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081878
>implying Wonka doesn't have a full staff of oompa-loompas watching every corner of the internet to DMCA anything Wonka

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:54:00 No.19081913 Report

Quoted By: >>19082439 >>19082468

>>19081863
Forgot about this scene. It is clear that Wonka possesses the technology for nuclear warfare.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:54:00 No.19081917 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081846
they were payed by raping the children who failed Wonka's tests. They lead the parent off to be killed and then have their own community child cumdumpsters.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:54:00 No.19081922 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081905

But talking about how hot she was as an adult on the internet IS pedo territory.

Then again, this IS /tv/, pedo capital of 4chan.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:56:00 No.19081934 Report

Quoted By: >>19081954 >>19082082

>>19081905
I really hate when the remake did to her scene. Calling her a bad egg implies that her shitty parents are also to blame, but calling her a bad nut just doesn't carry the same weight.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:57:00 No.19081954 Report

Quoted By: >>19082003

>>19081934

That's how it was in the book, though, which is what they were going on.

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Fa (...).jpg, 25KiB, 640x368

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:58:00 No.19081960 Report

Quoted By: >>19081972

steals fizzy-lifting drinks; calls Wonka a crook, a cheat, and a swindler

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO mt6.jpg, 19KiB, 400x310

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 08:59:00 No.19081972 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081960

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1313571548532.jpg, 19KiB, 280x280

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:00:00 No.19081982 Report

Quoted By:

>Be Willy Wonka
>Put semen on wall paper
>claim its snozberries

also- request votes for archive
http://chanarchive.org/request_votes

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:01:00 No.19082003 Report

Quoted By: >>19082025

>>19081954
really? that's pretty gay. The spoiled rich girl wanting golden eggs makes more sense than randomly wanting trained squirrels.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:02:00 No.19082009 Report

Quoted By:

Interesting movie. It's mostly about the American dream. Consider the characters. Charlie struggles and overcomes poverty by playing the game and being determined to find that golden ticket. Veruca was born wealthy and because of her greed she invests in life poorly - the lesson there is you can shoot to high (don't reach for the stars without a plan). Fat fuck German kid is an example of unregulated consumerism - he eventually drowns because he jumps into expenditures way beyond his means. Violet is an example of misplaced ambition. Mike TV is a warning to the TV generation - economics and politics gained from the mass media will always be tainted. Wonka is the stock market. Example - he is always up and down. He controls this candy world. He must not be regulated in order to create wonderful candies.

It's basically Charlies adventure from poor to rich. It is because he is honest that he gains paradise.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:03:00 No.19082025 Report

Quoted By:

>>19082003

I think there's some discrepancy between English and American idioms there, that would explain it.

Moose !!UzgADXuLlVV

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Moose !!UzgADXuLlVV Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:04:00 No.19082034 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081145
Oh that slaps me on the knee.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:04:00 No.19082041 Report

Quoted By: >>19082091 >>19082092 >>19082131 >>19082264

>>19081830
Augustus is based on childhodd obesity
Violet is based on manners
Veruca is based on greed
Mike is based on lack of education

Charlie stole and didnt get a song about him.

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO weather balloon.jpg, 12KiB, 640x368

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:05:00 No.19082045 Report

Quoted By:

in conclusion, Grandpa Joe is an asshole

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:08:00 No.19082082 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081934
>golden eggs
>best omellettes ever
>filled with chocolate
Chocolate omellettes

>not allowed near them
>very fragile
Falls down angled platforms and dropped into a solid gold grocery cart

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:09:00 No.19082091 Report

Quoted By:

>>19082041
Who do you want to run your company when you die?

A fat useless nazi fuck?
A girl with an oral obession over chewing gum?
some spoiled little cunt?
A soon to be /tv/ posting tripfag neckbeard?

Or some poor starving thief with streetsmarts who will do whatever you tell him to?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:09:00 No.19082092 Report

Quoted By: >>19082254

>>19082041
Charlie was led into it by his grandpa, so it would've had to have been a song about the dangers of pressure from authority figures.

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Fa (...).jpg, 20KiB, 640x368

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:10:00 No.19082107 Report

Quoted By:

Up the airy mountain, down the rushing glen.
We dare not go a-hunting, for fear of little men.

You see, nobody ever goes in. Nobody ever comes out!

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:13:00 No.19082131 Report

Quoted By:

>>19082041
It's all about parenting, and in the end, having no father breeds the best kind of child.

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:16:00 No.19082182 Report

Quoted By:

submitted for vote

http://chanarchive.org/request_votes

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:17:00 No.19082199 Report

Quoted By: >>19082234

>>19081697
you do realize you can shit it out right?

I swallowed a coin when I was little and then I shit it out.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:18:00 No.19082202 Report

Quoted By:

You will never be able to summon oompa loompas by playing a tiny flute

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:18:00 No.19082208 Report

Quoted By:

it's nice that Wonka lies to Charlie at the end when he assures the boy that the other children are fine. He has no way to actually reverse the transformations and the other two are dead.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1308206698473.jpg, 21KiB, 347x393

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:19:00 No.19082216 Report

Quoted By:

I don't want to jinx it, but this is the best thread /tv/'s had in a while.

Good show!

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:21:00 No.19082234 Report

Quoted By:

>>19082199
Usually little boys can't shit coins...

you were raped

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:23:00 No.19082254 Report

Quoted By:

>>19082092
Wonka made a mistake picking Charlie then, if he's letting his shitty family move into the factory, too. Charlie already showed that his Grandpa can talk him into breaking the rules and being an idiot, so he's likely to do it again and end up killing Oompa Loompas or bankrupting the whole company.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Fa (...).jpg, 114KiB, 594x588

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:23:00 No.19082258 Report

Quoted By:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0067992/trivia

The film was originally financed by the Quaker Oats Company. They hoped to tie it to a new candy bar they intended to bring on the market. When the film was released, the company began marketing its "Wonka" chocolate bars. Unfortunately, an error in the chocolate formula caused the bars to melt too easily, even while on the shelf, and so they were taken off the market. Quaker sold the brand to St. Louis based Sunline, Inc. (which later became part of Nestlé via Rowntree) not long after this; Sunline was able to make the brand a success, and Wonka-branded candy (most of which isn't chocolate-based) is still available in the USA. Although the book this movie was based on was called 'Charlie and the Chocolate Factory', the movie was renamed to promote this candy tie-in.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Chimpanzee_thinking_poster.jpg, 18KiB, 299x383

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:23:00 No.19082264 Report

Quoted By: >>19082305 >>19082339

>>19082041
Yeah but unlike the other kids Charlie repented on his and gave the gobstopper to Wonka before he left.

Maybe if Veruca had stopped to consider she was being a bitch, Augustus had stopped being a fat pig for once, Mike had stopped being a violent impulsive asshole, and violet had some damn manners they wouldn't have gone out the way they did and not have gotten a song.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1318163460532.jpg, 192KiB, 756x771

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:25:00 No.19082279 Report

Quoted By: >>19082325

>you will never be able to take a trip to 4chan's servers with moot in a willy wonka-esque fashion.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:28:00 No.19082305 Report

Quoted By: >>19082321

>>19082264
where did the gobstopper thing come in anyways? He gave them all one for free and told them to keep it, so where did this secret test to give it back come from? There was never a stipulation that you only get to keep the gobstopper if you finish the tour.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 221466_130527.jpg, 11KiB, 224x175

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:28:00 No.19082306 Report

Quoted By:

Charlie and The Chocolate factory was ten times better and Johnny Depp was the better Wonka, playing the role as a disturbed individual instead of an all out clown.

The new film is also truer to the book.

Just saying, not trolling, it's just the truth.

inb4 haters hate because of nostalgic shit.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:30:00 No.19082321 Report

Quoted By: >>19082360

>>19082305
Slugworth wanted Charlie to give him the gobstopper so he could reverse engineer it and make his own version of it. Charlie leaving it on Wonka's desk meant that he was definitely not going to give it to Slugworth.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Mootoffended.jpg, 192KiB, 849x1918

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:31:00 No.19082325 Report

Quoted By:

>>19082279

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:32:00 No.19082339 Report

Quoted By: >>19082419

>>19082264
the only reason Charlie didn't get a song was because he's a sneaky little cunt and nobody caught him when he fucked up. Any one of the other kids could have repented after their misadventures, but because they weren't sneaky about how awful they were, they don't get the factory. It's bullshit

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:34:00 No.19082360 Report

Quoted By:

>>19082321
oh I get it. I forgot that Slugworth talked to each winner.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:36:00 No.19082370 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081083

>It's been a long time since I've seen the movie, what does the guy actually say to Charlie?

"No one will ever believe you."

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Fa (...).jpg, 47KiB, 640x368

FrankBooth !KcsuXV8r0Q Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:39:00 No.19082406 Report

Quoted By: >>19082440

Other than the Oompa-Loompas and the latin news anchor, there weren't any minorities in the whole film.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:40:00 No.19082419 Report

Quoted By: >>19082462

>>19082339
none of the other kids got a chance to give it back before they were almost savagely killed.

even if, fuck that guy, he would have yelled at a kid who wouldnt of done anything only to test their loyalty.

the bigger picture here is NEVER TAKE CANDY FROM STRANGERS

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:42:00 No.19082439 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081913
Do you realize in real life how far Uncle Sam would be up Wonka's ass?

Just the FDA with regulations and wanting to constantly check on their operations.

Willy would be operating overseas by now.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:42:00 No.19082440 Report

Quoted By:

>>19082406
im pretty sure some of the workers for Verucas dad were hispanic

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:44:00 No.19082462 Report

Quoted By:

>>19082419
I do like that Wonka's plan was to piss off these people to such an extent that they are overwhelmingly tempted to sell him out. After making them all hate him so much, it really means something that Charlie was still unwilling to betray his trust.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO image.jpg, 7KiB, 284x177

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:45:00 No.19082468 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081913
"We have reason to believe that Willy Wonka in his chocolate factory has the technology and ability to develop weapons of mass destruction."

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:45:00 No.19082471 Report

Quoted By: >>19082483

wonka wash

mindblown.jpg

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:46:00 No.19082483 Report

Quoted By:

>>19082471
Wonka facial

Samus Aran !!xqFeO/rcjEV

Samus Aran !!xqFeO/rcjEV Mon 24 Oct 2011 09:53:00 No.19082561 Report

Quoted By:

>>19081041
Holy shit. You're right.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 10:07:00 No.19082735 Report

Quoted By:

I love it when /tv/ takes my childhood memories and savagely dissects them to reveal they werent actually fun and magical, but rather disturbing and cynical

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO system of the downs.jpg, 191KiB, 1293x435

Anonymous Mon 24 Oct 2011 10:18:00 No.19082829 Report

Quoted By:

>mfw my favorite part of the movie is now when the little girl in the ponytail during the 'Candyman Can' song gets hit in the chin by the guy raising the bar door up.

And Fickel Gruber's.

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