/v/ - Video Games » Thread #109012784

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Anonymous !RevGiOKgRo Sun 04 Sep 2011 02:56:00 No.109012784 View View Reply Original Report

Quoted By:

>Go to work at the news network building.
>Fill my desk with tranquilizer darts and an EMP grenade.
>Make sure to write my password down and put it on my desk incase I forget.

HURR DURR

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 02:58:00 No.109012952 Report

Quoted By:

>Shoot police officer
>More swarm over towards me
>Stare at them
>Crouch and crabwalk into a vent shaft
>Cops say "WHERE DID HE GO?!?!?!"

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:00:00 No.109013236 Report

Quoted By:

>Set a clever trap of hidden proximity mines to cover the back entrance of my secret lair.
>Make them beep really loud and have a flashing light.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:03:00 No.109013487 Report

Quoted By:

>Guarding a high security door with a camera covering it by myself.
>See a vending machine get flung across the hallway.
>Better go check it out.
>By myself ;_;

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:04:00 No.109013654 Report

Quoted By: >>109014019

>buddy of mine gets knocked out cold
>go over to revive him
>he said he was attacked by a man
>look for said man for 30 seconds
>give up and return to normal

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:05:00 No.109013755 Report

Quoted By:

>not enough energy to punch a guy in the face
>eat a bar of chocolate
>suddenly able

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:05:00 No.109013760 Report

Quoted By:

Oh god, this fucking thread man.

>On guard duty with a bro, he's facing the door behind me
>door opens and he goes to investigate
>I hear what sounds like punches and groans
>lol oh well

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:05:00 No.109013815 Report

Quoted By:

>the only guy that can stop me literally can't touch the metal my mech is made out of without taking damage
>be certain to leave huge gaps in my mechs armor with big, bright flashing weak spots which could have easily been covered up with metal

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:07:00 No.109013849 Report

Quoted By: >>109014016 >>109014256

>Security Manager for robotic defense system
>Programming the robots and their patrol paths from a terminal.
>Decide to add a "shoot friendly soldiers" button
>Not worried, the computer is password protected.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:08:00 No.109013961 Report

Quoted By: >>109014292

>just chilling in a dungeon on azeroth
>see a band of warriors shoot at my friend in the distance, he runs to them with some comrades and get's killed
>yeah whatever I don't give a fuck, come at me bros, I'll deal with them when they get close enough

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:08:00 No.109014016 Report

Quoted By:

>>109013849
You forgot something at the end.

>Not worried, the computer is protected by a password that I wrote down and placed in my desk

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:08:00 No.109014019 Report

Quoted By:

>>109013654
>buddy gets knocked out
>another guard runs over to revive him, gets knocked out
>I'd better go help him
I love the tranquilizer rifle.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:08:00 No.109014024 Report

Quoted By: >>109015009 >>109016607 >>109026983

I quickly learned that Pritchard is such a dick to everyone because EVERYONE IN THE BUILDING IS FUCKING RETARDED WHEN IT COMES TO NETWORK AND DOOR SECURITY!

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:09:00 No.109014054 Report

Quoted By:

>Have a security camera cover a vital area
>Leave it with a massive blind spot
>Leave the console that controls it undefended

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:09:00 No.109014097 Report

Quoted By:

>Present day
>4 legged robots with incredible maneuverability, multiple rockets which can be fired from several locations, and AI able to flank and detect sound.
>20 years in the future
>2 legged robots with slow movement speeds and attached miniguns and 1 rocket launcher, AI can not detect sound.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:09:00 No.109014140 Report

Quoted By:

>See the hero that has slain thousands of my nation's enemies come into my shop
>He asks to buy something, tell him I don't like him enough.
>He goes and kills one more enemy.
>Decide I like him enough to sell him my private selection next time.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:11:00 No.109014256 Report

Quoted By:

>>109013849
Hahaha, best yet.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:11:00 No.109014292 Report

Quoted By:

>>109013961
Go back to wow fag . Back on topic

> be security guard
> be blinded by laser in eye
> im sure its nothi

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:12:00 No.109014311 Report

Quoted By:

>Hear an alarm go off, go to investigate the source.
>See 4 dead friendly soldiers
>Alarm turns off
>"Oh well, guess it was nothing"
>Go back to watching TV with my back to the entrance of the room.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:12:00 No.109014363 Report

Quoted By:

>feel dart tip hit my body
>meh

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:13:00 No.109014464 Report

Quoted By:

>Be a Belltower soldier
>Have a mech accompany my patrol
>It suddenly stops move
>Stupid piece of shit probably broke down
>Continue with my patrol

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:14:00 No.109014475 Report

Quoted By: >>109014922

>Pritchard bitches about security
>his computers password is his online nickname (with no 3)
O.....kay.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:15:00 No.109014580 Report

Quoted By: >>109015277

>new aug which allows you to see enemies through walls
>wonder how the aug manages to determine who is your enemy

SCIENCE

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:15:00 No.109014651 Report

Quoted By:

>Installing security for the company's computer system.
>Have to decide between security level 1, 2, 3, 4, or 5
>"Hmm.. I'll go with 2".

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:17:00 No.109014770 Report

Quoted By:

>room full of enemies
>knock out one of them
>another one comes to revive him
>again and again
>eventually pile of bodies
It keeps happening!

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:17:00 No.109014801 Report

Quoted By: >>109014999

>walking down the street, see someone hacking a storage unit
>scream that he's trying to kill me and run away in terror

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:17:00 No.109014839 Report

Quoted By:

>remember patrolling in DRB territory with my bros
>remember sharp pain in face, wake up in sewer with 25 foot drop from a bro tapping my shoulder
>walk it off and patrol in my sector

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:18:00 No.109014901 Report

Quoted By:

>set a refrigerator beside the door
>knock the door open
>lay down
>they see me
>"where did he go? lets find him"

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:18:00 No.109014922 Report

Quoted By:

>>109014475
To be fair that's a nice idea sort of like a double bluff.
He moans so much about security no one would guess he has such a simple pass

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:19:00 No.109014999 Report

Quoted By:

>>109014801
This when hacking computers at TYM. Them scientists screaming in terror and flailing their arms around while running in circles, and guards not giving a fuck.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:19:00 No.109015009 Report

Quoted By: >>109019023

>>109014024

As someone who does network security for a living I can confirm this is a massive problem in real life too, which makes it all the more hilarious. There's only so much I can do when people leave a sticky note with their user name and password on their monitor or make their password some abysmally easy shit like "1234" or "password". Goddamn.

Pritchard, I know that feel bro. I know that feel.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:22:00 No.109015277 Report

Quoted By:

>>109014580
I'm pretty sure you can see friendlies too

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:22:00 No.109015288 Report

Quoted By: >>109015381 >>109015535

>Guarding the armory at the police station
>Suddenly the door closes for no reason
>Go and take a look at it
>Out of nowhere some asshole is chocking me
>Wake up five hours later in a vent

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:23:00 No.109015353 Report

Quoted By:

>be guard
>patrollin all day erry day
>hear strange sounds
>look whats wrong
>"huh? someone punched a hole in the wall"
>see a bro with broken neck lying on the ground
>"it was probably nothing"

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:24:00 No.109015381 Report

Quoted By:

>>109015288
LOL I did that too, when he went to check it out I closed the door on that fucker and he walked around in there like nothing happened.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:25:00 No.109015470 Report

Quoted By: >>109015535

More like,
>entire police station wakes up in a vent
>gotta go and stop rioters

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:25:00 No.109015483 Report

Quoted By:

>Guard some secret locked down bio laboratory
>Some eggheads come running out of their restricted area office screaming and cowering
>Don't give a shit

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:25:00 No.109015535 Report

Quoted By:

>>109015470
>>109015288
Forgot the number.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:26:00 No.109015587 Report

Quoted By:

>Pick up two people by their throats at arms' length
>The laws of gravity magically change and I don't fall forward!

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:27:00 No.109015640 Report

Quoted By:

>Working at Sarif HQ
>Leave my office for a few minutes
>Come back
>Someone stole my candy bar

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:27:00 No.109015649 Report

Quoted By:

>live in dystopian future where access to weapons in tightly controlled and guns are only available through dangerous arms dealers and gangs
>somehow acquire ammo and keep it in locker at work

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:27:00 No.109015710 Report

Quoted By:

>Patrolling a room with 5 other comrades
>Suddenly I'm the only one left
>Damn it, why would they go on a coffee break and not invite me?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:28:00 No.109015758 Report

Quoted By:

>Work for huge TV / News station
>Bring stun gun and ammo into meetings

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:28:00 No.109015764 Report

Quoted By:

>See guy running around hacking every computer and door in the office
>Ignore it

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:29:00 No.109015870 Report

Quoted By:

>Chatting with buddy in his office in a police station
>See vent behind him open
>Move to investigate
>"Nah, probably nothing."
>Voice comes from the vent
>"Oh hey Jensen, we were just talking about you."

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:30:00 No.109015971 Report

Quoted By:

>Hear screams of fellow security guards being mowed down by a hacked turret
>Run toward the sound, see security guards being shot in front of me
>Run to middle of the room in hopes that the turret ran out of ammo just before I get in

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:32:00 No.109016091 Report

Quoted By: >>109016232

>hack into every person's office
>take their credits and other items from their desk
>never get reprimanded for doing so
SO REAL

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:32:00 No.109016124 Report

Quoted By: >>109021764 >>109027252

>guard duty at Nip Nong Medical
>some white guy with robo-arms wearing a combat vest wants access to high-security area
>shows me an ID card
>has a picture of some Chinese guy on it
>let him in anyway
>he tells me I'm doing a good job

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:33:00 No.109016232 Report

Quoted By: >>109016882

>>109016091
CLearly you never checked your e-mails.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:35:00 No.109016331 Report

Quoted By:

>guarding shipping offices
>patrolling around in the storage room near where my boss has an office
>everything seems cool, no alarms or anything
>suddenly some motherfucker drops a giant guard robot through the ceiling for no appreciable reason
>act like a badass motherfucker and not give a shit

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:36:00 No.109016470 Report

Quoted By: >>109016581 >>109016658 >>109018070

>hang out in detroit alleyways with bros
>guy with major augs and a sweet trenchcoat walks past
>watch him go to basketball court
>he unsuccessfully tries to throw ball into the hoop
>see him pile up a cardboard box and barrel on top of eachother
>he climbs up and drops ball through hoop
>whatthefuck

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:37:00 No.109016581 Report

Quoted By:

>>109016470
I guess he likes to play with balls.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:38:00 No.109016607 Report

Quoted By:

>>109014024
Exactly. Pritchard's not an asshole, he just has to deal with complete retards who don't know shit about computers 24/7.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:38:00 No.109016649 Report

Quoted By:

>own a nice trench coat
>take it off whenever I'm doing anything important

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:38:00 No.109016658 Report

Quoted By:

>>109016470
lol'd

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:40:00 No.109016818 Report

Quoted By: >>109021079

>doing regular patrol in the city
>some guy walking with a cardboard box
>suddenly throws box at me
>shoot him

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:40:00 No.109016882 Report

Quoted By:

>>109016232

>Get a few codes for a few offices
>Steal shit from them
>New email
>"Hey man, some offices got broken into I heard. Mind checking mine if all is still there? Code is xxxx"
>Take more shit from another office with newly acquired code

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:41:00 No.109016901 Report

Quoted By: >>109017291

Anyone have that neckbeard orange/lemon lime comic?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:41:00 No.109016956 Report

Quoted By:

>be a police officer
>see some guy stacking two dumpsters on top of each other so he can hop the fence to where we have 2 unguarded entrances to the station as well as a cache of evidence
>dont give a fuck

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:41:00 No.109016969 Report

Quoted By:

>Patrolling and generally not giving a fuck
>Suddenly some guy in a trenchcoat walks in with a fridge and throws it at me

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:43:00 No.109017081 Report

Quoted By:

>be a police officer, fuck I love my job.
>nothing in particular to do, best I patrol this empty hallway on the third floor.
>wait.. Is that Jensen I see there?
>Haas never said anything about letting Jensen in.
>Better shoot him to death in a police station. What a fucking douchebag.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:44:00 No.109017182 Report

Quoted By:

>be a detroit gang banger
>suddenly see a fellow gang member keel over unconscious
>3 more gang members spawn out of thin air to help me check it out
>must be nothing
>be detroit detective in police station
>suddenly night guard falls over unconscious
>3 swat members spawn out of thin air to help me investigate
>must be nothing

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:44:00 No.109017194 Report

Quoted By: >>109017517 >>109017560

>Be hired security
>Guy with loads of augs approaches me
>Tell him he shouldn't be here
>He walks 10 metres away and starts pressing buttons on a terminal to a garage space
>IF YOU DONT LEAVE I'LL SHOOT LAST WARNING
>He ignores me because he probably can't hear me and he's just going about his business
>Fuck it
>Shoot him, get all my bros to help.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:45:00 No.109017291 Report

Quoted By:

>>109016901

No.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:45:00 No.109017340 Report

Quoted By:

>Come back home after a long day at work
>Notice my door is open
>Walk in worried as fuck
>Someone stole my fridge and candy bars
>go to the bathroom because I have to take a piss
>Notice my fridge is in the shower
FUCKING DETROIT

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:46:00 No.109017414 Report

Quoted By:

>Working in the security room with 2 other bros
>When we want to talk we all get up and walk within 30cm of eachother to chat.
>All walk back to our desks and stay silent

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:46:00 No.109017426 Report

Quoted By:

>On patrol duty
>Turn left a guy appears out of nowhere like he was invisible
>Aim at him
>He charges down the corrodor and pulls out a box filled with these candybars
>Not sure why he ate candybars before I was about to kill him
>Turns invisible again
>The fu-
>Suddenly somebody taps me on the back of my shoulder
>Next thing I know I'm lying down on the floor until another Spec Ops guy wakes me up
>Decide to continue patrolling and forget what happened

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:47:00 No.109017511 Report

Quoted By:

>JARON IS THAT YOU?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:47:00 No.109017517 Report

Quoted By:

>>109017194
>Block entrance to base from some guy in a trench coat
>He glows orange and dissapears.
>should probably stop drinking on duty

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:48:00 No.109017531 Report

Quoted By:

this fucking thread

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:48:00 No.109017560 Report

Quoted By:

>>109017194
>tell Jensen he isn't supposed to be here
>if you don't leave I'll shoot
>he starts walking away
>shoot him anyway

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:49:00 No.109017655 Report

Quoted By:

this thread... awesome.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:50:00 No.109017742 Report

Quoted By:

>Working as a guard for a shady organisation
>See a guy dart into a room
>Watch buddy go and check it out
>Door closes
>Buddy doesn't come out of the room for the rest of the shift
>lol, time to go home

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:50:00 No.109017745 Report

Quoted By: >>109018923

>working a leading augmentation corporation
>standing guard outside of a room with sensitive material
>heavily augmented suspicious man walks up to me
>tell him he's not allowed in
>he understands and mentions how awesome a guard's job must be
>feel flattered and tell him all about the security system, what places cameras can't see, and which laser trip has been acting up lately

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:50:00 No.109017760 Report

Quoted By:

>spot a man in the area
>he dashes behind a stack of barrels
>nowhere for him to go
>now I've got him
>oh, wait a minute, maybe he got away
>go back to patrolling

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:50:00 No.109017775 Report

Quoted By:

Like 90% of these are funny.

Sometimes, I love you /v/.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:50:00 No.109017783 Report

Quoted By:

>patrolling halls
>someone barges out a corner carrying one of our security turrets
>it's hacked to shoot at me
>walk toward it and shoot at it with my pistol until I die

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:51:00 No.109017880 Report

Quoted By: >>109018081 >>109018885

>be security chief of company
>unknown person stealing stuff from us
>get security code to suspect's office and search it
>steal his credit chip
>crawl through air vents to other offices
>steal everything i can find
>next day people go nuts about more stuff getting stolen
>everyone send me their door codes
>steal even more stuff
best security chief ever

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:51:00 No.109017891 Report

Quoted By:

This thread

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:52:00 No.109017962 Report

Quoted By:

>kid gets to the top floor of my secretly evil organization
>challenge him
>kills my pets
>give him what he came for and leave

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:52:00 No.109017965 Report

Quoted By:

>talking to a friend about Jensens state of mind
>he's standing next to us keep talking
>wake up a few hours later in some vent

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:53:00 No.109018005 Report

Quoted By:

>walking and patrolling around
>hear a loud smash
>a mansized hole have appeared in a wall
>stand in the new opening
>shrug and walk away

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:53:00 No.109018007 Report

Quoted By:

>be a security bot
>checking shit out with my bro's
>suddenly start gunning them down
>program altered, can't stop myself
>everything is in slow motion as i die on the inside
>am suddenly fried via an emp grenade
>realise i've been raped both mentally and now physically just for my XP points
>i take one last look at the corpses of my fallen bro's
>shut down

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:53:00 No.109018045 Report

Quoted By:

>Standing guard like always
>Suddenly a grenade comes flying round the corner and three of my buddies choke and get knocked out by a deadly looking green gas
>Run straight into the gas and instantly get knocked out aswell

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:53:00 No.109018070 Report

Quoted By:

>>109016470

Alright this one made me fucking lose it.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:54:00 No.109018081 Report

Quoted By:

>>109017880
I'm so doing this.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:54:00 No.109018090 Report

Quoted By: >>109026370

>work for ting tong medical
>discussing science
>heavily augmented guy walks into room, talks to guard
>hear what i think is a bribe between the aug and guard, can't tell because other bitch is talking
>guard leaves, aug hacks nearby terminal and begins operating our crane
>don't give a fuck, continue to discuss science

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:54:00 No.109018107 Report

Quoted By:

great thread
just sayan
didnt like the game that much

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:54:00 No.109018158 Report

Quoted By:

>on my patrol around the area
>see heavily augmented man walking away from restricted area
>hmmmmmmmm
>see an aud attached to keypad by the restricted door fizzing and popping and shooting sparks all over the fucking place
>continue patrol

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:55:00 No.109018226 Report

Quoted By:

>Wake up in a back alley
>Last thing I remember was talking to a guy about wearing sunglasses at night

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:56:00 No.109018302 Report

Quoted By:

>be sentry turret
>guarding elevator door like a boss
>my human bros patrolling the halls are very quiet
>nevermind, just watch the fucking eleva-
>suddenly someone picks me up from behind
>WHAT THE HELL
>sets me down again facing the corner, like an insolent child
>okay.jpg

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:56:00 No.109018323 Report

Quoted By: >>109018552

>too pissed about some crazy aug living under our roof
>never go to the warehouse to pick up his mirror because he'll break it again
>one day the aug confronts me and asks slowly and politely for his mirror
>lie and pretend it never came
>wake up a few hours later in a confirmed space, behind what seems to be a television
>howdidheknow.jpg

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:57:00 No.109018352 Report

Quoted By:

>Some augmented dick lets me run away even though I killed loads of hostages
>Sweet lol
>Meet up with him and bring 2 bodyguards because I'm really worried he might do something now
>tell him some information
>He walks straight behind me
>Me and my bodyguards don't give a fuck so we just keep looking forward cus we know he's probably too pussy to-

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:58:00 No.109018433 Report

Quoted By:

>go home from long day at work to my apartment in shang hai
>fridgerator across the room
What the fuck? seriously...come on...

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:58:00 No.109018450 Report

Quoted By:

>be chiron building manager
>some guy in a trenchcoat lives in one of the suites
>calls me one day, broke his mirror
>get it fixed
>calls me the next day, broke it again
>go check it out, he obviously did it himself
>tell him I'll get it repaired
>call the supplier
>the guy insists all the time
>mirror arrives, I'm so pissed off that I don't tell the guy
>he comes one day and tazes me
>drags me into his suite and puts me into a secret compartment
>goes to china

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:58:00 No.109018480 Report

Quoted By:

>guarding the entrance to the police station's restricted area
>man in street clothees I've never seen before walks out of restricted area
>when he goes back I try to tell him to leave
>he walks by me
>oh well, he's in there now, not my job
>he crouches behind a pillar and trains his tranq-rifle on a patrolling guard
>oh, whatever!

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:58:00 No.109018489 Report

Quoted By: >>109018842 >>109019842 >>109021941

>Patrolling the Police Station on the 2nd floor
>See Jensen looking at a locked door
>He runs off and starts to build a cardboard box fortress around the door.
>"What a weird guy."

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:59:00 No.109018552 Report

Quoted By: >>109018656 >>109018693

>>109018323
LOL
Someone post the video!

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:59:00 No.109018571 Report

Quoted By:

>Dying of a deadly nanovirus
>MIBs at my hotel door
>Me and my brother decide to go out in a blaze of glory
>We actually wreck their shit, kill every last one
>Brother climbs back out the window, I collapse instantly

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO waitangaems.jpg, 68KiB, 800x530

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:59:00 No.109018576 Report

Quoted By:

>be on guard duty
>talking and chilling with my buddy
>he leaves for another lap around the room next to us
>gets out of sight
>the sound of a vending machine being picked up and thrown
>stand around and wait for my buddy to come back from his patrol

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 03:59:00 No.109018580 Report

Quoted By:

>work for Ching Chong Medical.
>gotta meet dat dateline!
>dude with serious augs comes up to me and says 'Hi'
>tell him off that he can't bother me, I have a deadline.
>lol sure told him.
>he whips out a gun.
>OHSHITOHSHITOHSHITOHANCESTORSNOMYDEADLINE
>run around flailing my arms and screaming that he's out to murder me.
>nobody gives a shit. Feel a bit embarrased now.
>go back to my desk, serious aug dude is gone.
>oh well, gotta meet dat deadline!

59 !RevGiOKgRo

59 !RevGiOKgRo Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:00:00 No.109018630 Report

Quoted By:

>give me deus mode
>pick up box of stun gun darts
>ammo: 1

unfinished piece of shit game. Still enjoyed it

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:00:00 No.109018642 Report

Quoted By:

>see friend getting knocked out and sucked into a vent
>go back to work in 30 seconds

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO poor436.jpg, 326KiB, 448x2432

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:00:00 No.109018643 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:00:00 No.109018656 Report

Quoted By:

>>109018552
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whtNHRYJnrU&feature=channel_video_title

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO ohyou.jpg, 25KiB, 401x368

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:00:00 No.109018681 Report

Quoted By: >>109018806

>get to the old senile lady's house
>take her fridge and put it in the shower.
>She thinks nothing of it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:00:00 No.109018693 Report

Quoted By:

>>109018552
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whtNHRYJnrU

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1309296328114s.jpg, 3KiB, 126x117

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:01:00 No.109018704 Report

Quoted By:

>Be security guard in crowded workplace
>Hear something that sounds like a dude getting punched out
>Meh, probably nothing
>Later patrolling room with half a dozen other guards, hear footsteps on the floor below me
>HOLY FUCK I NEED TO INVESTIGATE THIS SHIT

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:01:00 No.109018725 Report

Quoted By:

>heavily augmented guy tells me to walk in, since i owe a favor to my buddy
>allow him but warn him to not screw things up
>minutes later, he kills my buddies, steal company property, mess with the emails from everybody, destroy walls, blows up robots, and even attempt to kill my boss

why.jpg

Deep&Edgy !pSkjEcB9sQ

Deep&Edgy !pSkjEcB9sQ Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:02:00 No.109018806 Report

Quoted By:

>>109018681
>senile

there's your problem

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:02:00 No.109018826 Report

Quoted By: >>109019041

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whtNHRYJnrU

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO oh shit nigger.jpg, 42KiB, 366x380

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:02:00 No.109018842 Report

Quoted By: >>109021941

>>109018489
Christ, nigger. There's a way in through a vent at the end of the hall to the right.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:03:00 No.109018866 Report

Quoted By:

>be leader of the Triads in lower Heng-Sha
>local club is our front
>multiple, unsecured entrances into our basement where we conduct shady deals
>incompetent guards leave codes lying around
>unguarded security room that controls all our cameras
>DJ booth protected by ultra-secure, third echelon encrypted maximum fuck-all level 5 security clearance
>robbed blind, but at least the DJ is safe

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:03:00 No.109018885 Report

Quoted By:

>>109017880
he's keeping their things secure! Securely in his pocket, that is.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO AlucardCrazy.jpg, 23KiB, 640x480

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:03:00 No.109018923 Report

Quoted By: >>109019000

>>109017745
FUCK MAN. I did that the other day on my second playthrough with the Social Enhancer

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:04:00 No.109019000 Report

Quoted By:

>>109018923
>2011
>not picking social skills in an RPG as soon as possible

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:04:00 No.109019004 Report

Quoted By:

THIS IS THE SPOT MAN

IF THERE'S SOMEONE HERE, YOU BETTER COME OUT

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:04:00 No.109019023 Report

Quoted By:

>>109015009
Yeah I thought he was just a dick at first, then I started reading peoples' e-mails and found everyone's sharing their goddamn door codes!

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1dicks0502563.jpg, 27KiB, 331x311

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:05:00 No.109019041 Report

Quoted By:

>>109018826

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:05:00 No.109019062 Report

Quoted By:

>have knowledge of a terrorist plot to kill many important people
>hire mr jenson to arrest the terrorist, the only man who can possibly do the job
>he tells me he let the terrorist go, this jenson just signed the death warrant for dozens of people
>reward him with a praxis kit

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:05:00 No.109019102 Report

Quoted By:

>me and a shitload of guys get deployed into picus tower to stop some faggot
>man this is a waste, we got so much firepower this is crazy
>suddenly vending machines dropping and flying from fucking nowhere killing all my bros
>NOPENOPENOPENOPE

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:05:00 No.109019127 Report

Quoted By: >>109019544

>Patrolling a narrow hallway
>Turn my back
>Turn my back again
>A vending machine is blocking my path
>Turn back again
>Another vending machine blocking the other path

okay.jpg

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:06:00 No.109019196 Report

Quoted By:

ARCHIVE THIS SHIT

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1303334302666.jpg, 12KiB, 286x235

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:07:00 No.109019269 Report

Quoted By:

>be super powerful bot
>latest technology, nothing can possibly harm me
>facing a measly human
>he takes cover, and throws a blue grenade
>I instantly die

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:07:00 No.109019283 Report

Quoted By:

>usually workout in the work rec room, but lately someone's been stealing my post-workout energy bars
>one day bring a box of energy bars and label my name on it
>comes back from a workout
>see Jensen walking out of my office, wrapping his arms around a box of energy bars, which has my name on it
>he approaches me
>compliment him on how well he handled the hostage situation and walk past him to my office
>waitaminute...

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:07:00 No.109019291 Report

Quoted By:

>Stuck doing guard duty at nip nong medical
>Hanging out with my belltower bro
>Fucking loves candy so much
>Tells me a story about he was almost crushed by a vending machine
>Weird guy in a trench coat nearby stares at us then walks down the walkway
>Turn around to my buddy when he gets fucking crushed by a vending machine
>See mister trenchcoat
>Picks up vending machine and headshots me with it
>See him eat a candy bar moments before I die

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:08:00 No.109019328 Report

Quoted By: >>109021881

>tai yong HQ
>ascending in elevator
>"you should hide those weapons, jensen, this level is public"
>"thanks, pritchard"
>i had to go through a level of heavy security with turrets and lasers and soldiers to get here

All of my WHY

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:08:00 No.109019363 Report

Quoted By: >>109019770

Some one needs to draw fat Jensen.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:09:00 No.109019403 Report

Quoted By:

>be uber-stealth SpecOps searching for heavily augmented man at TV station.
>hangin' with my bro near the stairs to the funicular
>Jensen has to come this way to get where he's headed, no path around us.
>No vents nearby.
>Absolutely perfect spot.
>"If Jensen makes his way this way he has one hell of a surprise waiting for him, he'll never get past us."
>Suddenly dawns on me that we're not facing the stairs.
>...
>...
>...
>Wake up 2 hours later in a daze.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:09:00 No.109019460 Report

Quoted By:

>know about Jensen's augmentations and what they are
>nobody supplies me and my team with EMP grenades or thermal vision goggles
>know he's a master hacker
>suggest booby trapping a computer in security
>everyone thinks I'm crazy

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:10:00 No.109019544 Report

Quoted By:

>>109019127
>design security system
>have cameras installed everywhere
>only have 30goto10 software installed on them
>the cameras are only accessible via a single monitor that is always locked
>never have anyone watch it

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:11:00 No.109019583 Report

Quoted By: >>109020337

>on assignment to kill a hacker
>some asshole knocks me and my entire team out
>chillin' in my office
>door miraculously opens by itself
>check it out
>wake 3 ours later with a concussion
>being on guard duty on the docks
>some asshole knocks me out again
>resignate when I come to it

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:11:00 No.109019632 Report

Quoted By:

>be on patrol
>turn corner
>weapon is on the ground, guy that was guarding the door to a secret area is nowhere to be seen
>looks legit
>continue on patrol

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:11:00 No.109019641 Report

Quoted By:

http://chanarchive.org/

/v/ hasn't made me laugh this hard in a while

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:11:00 No.109019652 Report

Quoted By:

>patrollin' like a boss
>weird dude with sunglasses runs up with a crate
>throws it
>it barely brushes my shoulder
>I die

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:11:00 No.109019655 Report

Quoted By: >>109022292 >>109022505

>testing some chemicals at Tai Yong Medical
>too much pressure
>the machine breaks and a piece of shrapnel breaks my suit
>some augmented american appears
>ask for help
>he leans against the wall and starts dancing
facken merrikans, they arr deserve to die.
now i'm parrarryed.

Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:12:00 No.109019680 Report

Quoted By:

>Working for Ching Chong Medical
>Come in to work
>Quite literally the entire staff have been stuffed into the vents
>Some crushed under vending machines
>All computers, door locks, security cams, turrets and bots have been hacked into oblivion
>All ammunition and food stolen
>All boxes stacked meticulously
>Every fucking stone has been turned
>Roll up my sleeves and work single-handedly to ensure these implants get shipped world-wide to every aug in the world.
>The Dragon Lady will be proud.

Also,

>new building regulations have just come in
>mandatory man-sized vents
>most of which never lead to air-conditioning units or even link to vents outside
>mandatory ladders within ventilation systems
>vents must also be easy to open

This is what happens when you give the rat mutants rights.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:12:00 No.109019694 Report

Quoted By:

>be normal person trying to get to upper hengsha
>after a hard day of applying everywhere and doing odd jobs I take a nap
>I wake up to see my door wide open and floating fridge in front of me
>the last thing I hear is the sound of chocolate being eaten

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:12:00 No.109019731 Report

Quoted By: >>109020011

>be an asian gun dealer
>a very augmented american wants to buy my stuff
>direct him to the computer
>he spends thousands of credits on my goods
>about to leave
>I say "YOU MAKE ME POOR!"
>american gives a weird look

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:12:00 No.109019746 Report

Quoted By:

>Be Chinese Civilian
>Some stupid American Aug says something to me in his fat language - he doesn't even speak Chinese.
>Say "Stupid American"
>It's not like he can understand me or anything...

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:12:00 No.109019751 Report

Quoted By:

>be a Harvester
>doing some routine maintenence on my bosses augs
>some guy breaks into the room we're in
>boss tells us to leave and give them some privacy
>leave room
>corpses of fellow gang members littered everywhere
>"The boss says you're okay, i guess that's fine"

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:13:00 No.109019770 Report

Quoted By: >>109019970

>>109019363
With dozens of candy bar wraps around him while he chugs a jar of cyberboost chocolate.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO extremeboxfortress2.jpg, 299KiB, 1920x1080

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:14:00 No.109019842 Report

Quoted By:

>>109018489
>Guarding the Police Station entrance
>Keep hearing stuff being thrown downstairs
>Jensen walks through the door with cardboard boxes
>Half an hour later the lobby is filled with vending machines, photocopiers, cardboard boxes and trash cans
>How the fuck do I get out

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:15:00 No.109019970 Report

Quoted By:

>>109019770
Or he just shovels it directly out of the superjar!

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1290017245057.png, 747KiB, 700x714

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:15:00 No.109019975 Report

Quoted By:

>Be crazed worker
>Spot Jenson
>Me and about a dozen crazed bros attack him
>He hides on top of a machine
>Only comes down every 20 seconds to punch one of us.

Really Jenson?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:15:00 No.109020010 Report

Quoted By:

>politely blackmail a heavily augmented looking person
>wake up in the sewers

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:15:00 No.109020011 Report

Quoted By:

>>109019731
>Be arms dealer
>Same guy with glasses and trench coat keeps visiting me
>Never buys anything
>Just keeps selling me stuff

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:15:00 No.109020013 Report

Quoted By:

>design turret control software for a company
>design simple interface with 3 options
>enabled and disabled, pretty normal
>enemy - why the fuck did they want this option

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO My%20leg%20guy%20spongebob[1].jpg, 28KiB, 443x326

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:16:00 No.109020049 Report

Quoted By:

I never asked for this

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:16:00 No.109020059 Report

Quoted By:

>me and shitload of security bros are hanging out in ching chong medical tower
>i go to take a piss
>dragonlady's panic room alarm goes off
>well fuck
>i'm the last man to arrive in the room and see all my bros gathered around an airduct
>suddenly this guy jumps down from two floors up and then crouches down and half my squad fucking explodes like a cluster bomb went off
>he then ducks behind a couch and two more guys approach him, they don't seem him sneak around and then he fucking stabs the two them at same time with these fucking knives that come out of his arms
>i wasn't even supposed to be here today....

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:18:00 No.109020269 Report

Quoted By:

>be normal person
>when talking, constantly feel the need to swing my arm horizontally
>whatthefuck

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:18:00 No.109020292 Report

Quoted By:

>Just chilling as a security turret
>Wait...why is there suddenly a cardboard box in front of me
>There's another other one
>And another
>Damn it, I can't see a thing
>...I really wish I studied hard in school and became a security bot

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:18:00 No.109020298 Report

Quoted By:

>having a bad day
>see a aug thats Caucasian and walking around like he owns the place
>yell at him in the most sarcastic way I can, "HEY AMERICAN GO YANKEES!"
>he turns around and dashes at me
>wake up a few hour later in a small store stockroom with a bunch of other guys who look like me

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 443px-Nkahn.jpg, 30KiB, 443x490

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:19:00 No.109020337 Report

Quoted By: >>109020492

>>109019583
I believe you were talking about this man

>Pic

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:19:00 No.109020339 Report

Quoted By: >>109020517

>trapped in a room with a gas leak
>visor broke because a shelf fell down on top of me
>dying, can't get out
>nobody is bothering to help me
>cry because I don't want to die
>think about my wife and kid
>some guy that doesn't work for the fucking company comes over
>beg for help
>he forces his way through the door and shuts off valve

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:19:00 No.109020363 Report

Quoted By:

>work security for ding dong medical
>panic room alert for boss plays
>me and several bros storm towards her office and huddle together
>getting pep talk, grenade rolls into middle of group
>gas starts pouring out of it
>see heavily augmented dude standing just outside of the gas buildup
>motherfuck...

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:20:00 No.109020479 Report

Quoted By:

>Guarding an area
>Suddenly a cardboard box falls out of a ceiling vent
>What the shit?
>Better investigate this random, unrelated hallways
>Come back and my candy bar is gone and security terminal has been hacked
>Everything is perfectly normal.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:21:00 No.109020492 Report

Quoted By: >>109021294

>>109020337
How'd you get a pic of me?
You don't happen to be the asshole who has been tainting my PMC career?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:21:00 No.109020517 Report

Quoted By: >>109021165

>>109020339
>trapped in a room with a gas leak
>visor broke because a shelf fell down on top of me
>dying, can't get out
>nobody is bothering to help me
>cry because I don't want to die
>think about my wife and kid
>some guy that doesn't work for the fucking company comes over
>beg for help
>he starts dancing weirdly with his back to the wall while I asphyxiate

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:21:00 No.109020518 Report

Quoted By:

>Alarmed, me and my mates aproach an air duct
>dave already fired 30 shots into the vent, he must have seen something
>i call over backup, this could get serious
>backup runs over, 10 of us have this vent surrounded
>*pop, roll, sssssssssssssss*
>we all take a nap, fuck i dont even remember being tired

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:21:00 No.109020552 Report

Quoted By: >>109020663

>kill everyone on the streets of Detroit or Hengsha
>no consequences whatsoever, no additional police come to subdue my murder spree, Jensen, Malik, don't comment on my killing rampage or how I murdered hundreds of innocent civilians for no reason.

Fucking stupid. There are no consequences all for any actions.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:22:00 No.109020617 Report

Quoted By:

>guarding the police station like a baws
>suddenly a stranger wearing sunglasses at night stacks a bunch of boxes in front of a security panel
>must be nothing

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:22:00 No.109020663 Report

Quoted By: >>109020879 >>109021312

>>109020552
fallout 3 babby detected, not enough retarded numerical karma for you?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:23:00 No.109020727 Report

Quoted By:

>be a police officer
>walk down the halls of the station
>see man that shouldn't be here
>suddenly wake up with the rest of Detroit's finest in a air vent
>my credits, weapon, and ammo were stolen
>can't move because I'm stuck in an awkward position
>I don't get compensation either

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:23:00 No.109020765 Report

Quoted By:

can someone do one about the secuirty guard that has his desktop wallpaper replace by porn all the time

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:23:00 No.109020770 Report

Quoted By:

>be with my 4 bros on patrol
>suddenly a man in coat appears
>looks at us
>takes an entire jar of nutreins out of a pocket, opens it and eats the entire thing
>walks up to us
>I tell him to stop
>he starts to punch my guys in so awesome way that we freeze in time
>wake up 2 days later without my pocket secretary

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:24:00 No.109020877 Report

Quoted By:

>be security at The Hive
>hear a gunshot from the bathroom
>draw my gun and try to make the wall next to me to comply
>hear more gunshots
>come to my senses and go check it out
>find a pile of bodies by the bathroom door
>all shot in the head
>A COMPLETE MYSTERY HOW THEY DIED, BETTER TAKE A LO*bang*

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:24:00 No.109020879 Report

Quoted By: >>109021034 >>109021498

>>109020663
What the fuck does that even mean? What a fucking idiot.

Yes, it's fucking stupid that there is no consequence for killing civilians. It's stupid that you can shoot someone, and the rest of the NPCs just sit there a duck, not even bothering to run away from you. It completely breaks any immersion that exists within the game world.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1295371283533.jpg, 76KiB, 456x337

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:25:00 No.109020895 Report

Quoted By: >>109021138

>Be a Belltower guard
>Hear footsteps right next to me
>Nothing there
>It keeps happening
>This place is haunted

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:25:00 No.109020901 Report

Quoted By: >>109021095

>Hand out the files to the specified person as combined
>Try to scam him, charging him 1000 credits
>He tells me to fuck off and leaves with my stuff
>Swear revenge
>Go to 4chan and post all his info, ask my fellow anons to raid him
>Get replied with waves of sages and "not your personal army"
>sadfrog.jpg

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:26:00 No.109021034 Report

Quoted By:

>>109020879
>playing as a chief of security and decides to mass murder civilians
>bitches about immersion

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:26:00 No.109021072 Report

Quoted By:

>patrolling a high security military base
>see security camera flashing and beeping yellow
>it stops
>whatever

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:26:00 No.109021079 Report

Quoted By:

>>109016818
They used to just yell at you for that in DX1 and IW ;_;

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:27:00 No.109021095 Report

Quoted By:

>>109020901

>Hand out the files to the specified person as combined
>Try to scam him, charging him 1000 credits
>He tells me to fuck off and leaves with my stuff
>Swear revenge
>wake up with a trash can on my chest in a alleyway in Hengsha
>sadfrog.jpg

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:27:00 No.109021114 Report

Quoted By:

>Show up to work at Tai Young Medical
>Pretty boring day, about to get promoted! Perhaps I can quit this stupid job eventually and get a real one to support my wife and four young children!
>Walking around upstairs
>Friend is walking around with a minigun
>Turn around
>Turn back, friend is on the ground dead and a soda machine is laying on top of a desk

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO babby will murder you.jpg, 7KiB, 399x286

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:27:00 No.109021138 Report

Quoted By:

>>109020895
>hear footsteps
>no one is supposed to be here
>buddies say I'm "hearing ghosts again"
>OUR COMMANDER LAWERENCE ENDS UP DEAD, BARRELS THROWN AT HIS FACE!

GOD DAMN IT, YOU SHOULD OF LISTENED TO ME!

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1314657244228.gif, 673KiB, 210x179

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:27:00 No.109021165 Report

Quoted By:

>>109020517

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1310361682860.gif, 2MiB, 260x195

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:27:00 No.109021168 Report

Quoted By:

>Be the antagonist
>Want to kill the protagonist
>Plan a trap
>Protagonist walks right into it and springs it like an idiot
>Laugh at him and tell him it's game over
>Press the detonator
>The timer on the bomb starts ticking down
>Starting at 10 minutes
>HE'LL NEVER ESCAPE

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:27:00 No.109021200 Report

Quoted By:

>talk to pilot friend
>tell him to double check his systems, mechanic was an imposter
>he says "yeah?"
>mechanic worked on fuel system
>he says its a bomb
>a bomb

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Hughdarrowheadshot.png, 154KiB, 243x330

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:28:00 No.109021206 Report

Quoted By:

>Illuminati want to control everyone
>kill everyone

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1281605767014.png, 2KiB, 111x107

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:29:00 No.109021291 Report

Quoted By: >>109021644

>OP's image

Oh, fucking sweet! I found a new wallpap-
>big-ass IGN logo
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:29:00 No.109021294 Report

Quoted By:

>>109020492
.....Shit

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:29:00 No.109021295 Report

Quoted By:

>Patrolling the streets of Detroit with my fellow cop buddies
>Big, heavily augmented and tough-looking guy running really fast with a shotgun on his hands
>Dont give a shit, keep patrolling

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:29:00 No.109021312 Report

Quoted By: >>109021483 >>109021714

>>109020663

This should at least get raised eyebrows and comments from people who can hop on Jensen's AR. Pritchard, who calls you Attila the Hun for killing the terrorists, won't even comment about you killing ALL THE GODDAMN COPS IN THE CITY to get that wet-drive back ?

Not even one comment ?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:29:00 No.109021345 Report

Quoted By:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y414Q7vVgYU

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1305599031605.gif, 1MiB, 320x240

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:30:00 No.109021411 Report

Quoted By:

>sneaking around some vent shafts
>Drop down into an office
>I need energy
>Coffee everywhere, I can't pick it up
>Take a beer instead

I can't get over this

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:31:00 No.109021483 Report

Quoted By: >>109021791

>>109021312
You wouldn't have had to kill them if you convinced the desk sergeant to let you in.
But you couldn't because you never asked him for this.

Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:31:00 No.109021498 Report

Quoted By:

>>109020879

>purposely break immersion
>complain that the game is not immersive enough

I bet that whenever you see magic shows you spend 99% of your time saying that it was fake and it was "obviously smoke and mirrors."

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:31:00 No.109021543 Report

Quoted By: >>109021926

>suffer intense guilt after shooting an augmented street punk a couple of years ago because the man who should have done it didn't have the balls to obey orders
>suddenly he walks into my world again out of the blue and starts demanding that I should allow him access to a restricted area
>intense rage of a thousand suns washes over me, he ruined my life and now he wants to ruin it again
>FUCK HIM FUCK HIM FUCK HIM ILL MAKE HIM SEE THAT ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES! HE'LL PAY FOR WHAT HE'S DONE! HE'LL NEV-
>tells me it's in the the past and that I should forgive myself
>oh well I guess it was in the past. I should forgive myself.
>let him go through

>everythingwentbetterthanexpected.png

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO MTS2_EsmeraldaF_1012171_Gunther_ (...).jpg, 68KiB, 551x609

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:31:00 No.109021562 Report

Quoted By:

>go to soda machine
>pay money
>press orange
>they give me lemon lime
>.......
>they know I like orange

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:32:00 No.109021644 Report

Quoted By: >>109022196

>>109021291
newfag can't photoshop. what a surprise.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:33:00 No.109021714 Report

Quoted By: >>109022322

>>109021312
the game is not programmed to respond to dicking around. Simply because such responses are only necessary when a playthrough like that is really a possibility. But most people simply save the game, then kill everyone and then reload the save and keep on playing normally.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:34:00 No.109021752 Report

Quoted By:

>get email that incriminates me and it's sender in criminal activity, or has the new access code for my super secret incriminating room/safe/gate/closet.
>faggot tells me to delete the email after I read it

Hahahaha faggot thinks I have time to give a fuck. I'm to busy being a TOTAL FUCKING BOSS to give a shit about some faggy ass shit like covering my tracks. Now brb, gonna go smoke my fucking $2,000 cigar I bought with illegal drug funds and stashed in my safe.

OH WHAT THE FUCK WHY IS IT OPEN.

Omg brb DPD at my fucking door, what the fuck do they want?

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1269121543504.png, 3KiB, 209x212

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:34:00 No.109021764 Report

Quoted By:

>>109016124

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:34:00 No.109021791 Report

Quoted By:

>>109021483
Or if he had snuck in through the sewers.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:35:00 No.109021881 Report

Quoted By:

>>109019328
The sudden turn from MJ12 secret base to Hong Kong streets was just as jarring. You were never more than a block or two from that building and they couldn't find you?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:35:00 No.109021920 Report

Quoted By:

>be a hobo in Detroit
>doing hobo stuff in an alley
>suddenly some crazy motherfucker in a trechcoat levitates down in a ball of orange lightning
>not give a single fuck
Such is life, in Detroit.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:35:00 No.109021926 Report

Quoted By: >>109022156

>>109021543

>they find out I let him in
>lose my job
>can't support my wife and kids
>all hell breaks loose in detroit when riots go on
>storm into his apartment complex lobby to demand answers
>he shows his face, I'm about to bitch him out
>"it's okay bro I'll recommend you to where I work it pays more than your previous job"
>everythingwentbetterthanexpected.jpg

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:36:00 No.109021941 Report

Quoted By:

>>109018489
i fucking did ths too!

>>109018842
And nope. the vent leads to the weaponry

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:37:00 No.109022015 Report

Quoted By:

>searching through drawers in offices at the police station
>never close the drawers

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1298949701747.gif, 60KiB, 300x321

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:37:00 No.109022022 Report

Quoted By: >>109022171 >>109022638

>receptionist at Sarif Industries.
>see security chief with military-grade cybernetic legs augmented for enhance strength and durability
>walks out of the tech lab on the 2nd floor
>stairs are too far away so he jumps down
>he dies instantly

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:37:00 No.109022035 Report

Quoted By: >>109022516

>be in line at LIMB
>been standing here since forever
>some dude in a trenchcoat walks right past us and up to the counter
>gets immediate service
>clench my fist in rage but keep it in my pocket
>guy walks out without a care in the world
>no one in line says a word
forever beta dot jaypeg

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:38:00 No.109022116 Report

Quoted By:

1 more archive vote

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:38:00 No.109022156 Report

Quoted By:

>>109021926
>they find out I let him in
>lose my job
>can't support my wife and kids
>all hell breaks loose in detroit when riots go on
>storm into his apartment complex lobby to demand answers
>he shows his face, I'm about to bitch him out
>"stop bitching and get out of my face"
>pull a gun on him out of anger
>he kills me with his blades
>kids and wife end up on the street

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:38:00 No.109022171 Report

Quoted By:

>>109022022
>be receptionist at Sarif Industries
>talking with a friend about how good a job Jensen did with the hostages
>told her how tragic it would be if we were attacked again
>she says "Especially since you'd be the first to..."

I'D BE THE FIRST TO WHAT?

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1283768052542.jpg, 151KiB, 1239x1058

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:39:00 No.109022196 Report

Quoted By:

>>109021644

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Dance to death.gif, 2MiB, 320x180

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:40:00 No.109022292 Report

Quoted By: >>109022505

>>109019655

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:40:00 No.109022322 Report

Quoted By: >>109022917 >>109023281

>>109021714

A lot of the charm of the original Deus Ex came from the fucking around trying to see how the game would react, and whether or not the programmers had thought about that possibility (hence the lady's room). It was disappointing back then when they hadn't thought of a possibility (or visibly forced you down one pre-established route, see forced loss of Gunther boss fight in Hell's Kitchen). It is all the more disappointing now, especially when said possibility was obvious.

That doesn't make HR a bad game.

It's still justified disappointment.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:40:00 No.109022365 Report

Quoted By:

>be in the line for the Hive
>suddenly the Hive's screens change to a picture of a chinese man and the speakers start broadcasting a conversation in which a man admits he killed his girlfriend with a clock
>continue not giving a fuck

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:41:00 No.109022409 Report

Quoted By:

> Have drugs in house
> Instead of hiding them in my safe, I plaster my room with mines.
> Don't give a shit about getting in myself.
> Can't even reach the fucking toilet.
> Keep the drugs in goddamn sight so you don't even have to enter the room to see the drugs.
> Professional.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:41:00 No.109022476 Report

Quoted By:

Okay I think it's pretty safe to say after reading all these post's that Adam Jensen is the greatest Troll in Vidya history.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:42:00 No.109022505 Report

Quoted By:

>>109022292
>>109019655

fuck you guys, i was a eating an orange.

Now there's a burning sensation in my nose because of the citric acid.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:42:00 No.109022516 Report

Quoted By:

>>109022035

Waah waah, they don't quickly and efficiently tend to my free consultation.

Shut up bitch. Obviously I get augmentations, fucking look at me, instead of spending forever wasting their time by asking about them and if they're "right for me".

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:43:00 No.109022638 Report

Quoted By: >>109022741 >>109022812 >>109022841 >>109022927 >>109023395

>>109022022
He doesnt have leg augmentations at first. You have to get them in the menu. Everything that coasts 2 praxis points are things he doesnt have.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1313301703971.jpg, 54KiB, 604x453

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:44:00 No.109022741 Report

Quoted By:

>>109022638

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:45:00 No.109022783 Report

Quoted By:

Not enough electric old men in this thread.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Dear mother of god.png, 107KiB, 320x177

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:45:00 No.109022802 Report

Quoted By:

>Doing security job at a news station
>Suddenly our turret starts going crazy and killing everyone
>Watch my dumbass coworkers get mowed down as they continue to search for a enemy that may have activated said turret.
>Fuck my job

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:45:00 No.109022812 Report

Quoted By:

>>109022638
actually that's wrong

He has all those augmentations but the doctor's thought the process of turning them all on at the same time would kill his body, so they gave him praxxis to slowly turn them on when he thinks he is ready for them.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:45:00 No.109022841 Report

Quoted By:

>>109022638

Actually, he does, their functionalities haven't been fully implemented yet. See computer in Detroit LIMB.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:46:00 No.109022917 Report

Quoted By: >>109023558

>>109022322
Deus Ex was also quite bad at giving you reactions to dicking around. You could murder most of Hong Kong, ALL of Silhouette in the catacombs, most of the Parisian citizens, the entire Versalife workforce, Tong's whole triad base, the Illuminati guy's maid and henchman... the list goes on. The game WOULD NOT NOTICE.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:46:00 No.109022927 Report

Quoted By:

>>109022638
No, that's fucking wrong. The Praxis points only unlock latent abilities, the don't spontaneously add robotic legs.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:47:00 No.109023004 Report

Quoted By:

>Hear gunshots and alarms
>My bros and I rush in to help the other guards
>Everyone is dead
>A vent in the corner of the room is open
>Give up after 2 minutes

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:47:00 No.109023058 Report

Quoted By:

>On a business trip to Detroit.
>Take some time off to cruise around, drop Alice off at the barber shop and walk around with Roger.
>Buy a new tricycle and fire extinguisher.
>Head back to barber shop, wing up behind a aug'd out guy in a trenchcoat.
>Strike up a conversation. Dude sounds like he smokes like a volcano, but is otherwise pretty chill.
>Find Alice, part ways with Mr. St. Helens, comment on her beard trim.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:47:00 No.109023069 Report

Quoted By: >>109023369

>hack into storage containers and personal computers
>steal thousands of credits from strangers
>always take the moral high ground when talking to people

I'm not asking for some kind of Fallout go-darkside-if-you-touch-something-that's-not-yours shit, but goddamn.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:49:00 No.109023213 Report

Quoted By:

>guarding the data core room at ping pong medical
>man comes in wearing a combat vest with military grade strength augmentations
>also carry a pistol, a machine pistol, a combat rifle, a heavy rifle, a sniper rifle, a stun gun, a crossbow, a rocket launcher, several types of grenades and mines, and candy bars
>vaguely mentions that I owe a friend a favor
>nothing suspicious at all
>let him through

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:50:00 No.109023281 Report

Quoted By:

>>109022322
>see forced loss of Gunther boss fight in Hell's Kitchen)
God I tried so many ways around that

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:50:00 No.109023292 Report

Quoted By:

>Decide I should do a radio check in with everyone to make sure nobody murdered all of them while I had my back turned
>Change my mind

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:51:00 No.109023369 Report

Quoted By: >>109023683

>>109023069

>Fallout go-darkside-if-you-touch-something-that's-not-yours shit

>get good karma for defending yourself against people who happen to be drug addicts
>lose karma for taking their ammo

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:51:00 No.109023395 Report

Quoted By:

>>109022638
He has them, he just has to activate them. They're dormant because his body isn't used to them yet. Didn't you pay attention to the explanations behind that at all?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:53:00 No.109023513 Report

Quoted By:

>Be a Bell Tower guard
>Hear gunshot from the second floor of the sweet
>Bro next to me goes to check it out
>Hear another gunshot
>Bro across from me goes to check it out
>Hear a third gunshot
>Last bro on the same floor as me goes to check it out
>Hear a fourth gunshot
>Man, that's a lot of gunshots, I better go check it out

CHASING GHOSTS GENERAL

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:53:00 No.109023531 Report

Quoted By: >>109023799

>doing my usual patrol around the offices
>turn around a corner
>a fridge in the middle of the hallway
>stare at it for what seems minutes
>it starts to hover
>the fridge slowly comes in my direction
>panic the fuck out
>pull my gun
>shaking like a leaf
>start shooting it
>IT DOESN'T STOP
>JESUS CHRIST THIS IS SOME POLTERGEIST BULLSHIT
>SO TERRIFIED I CAN'T SCREAM
>THE FRIDGE JUMPS AT ME LIKE A HUNGRY PREDATOR
>get woken up by a coworker
>asks if I'm OK
>catch a glimpse of the fridge again, now standing behind my coworker
>it goes dark again

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:53:00 No.109023558 Report

Quoted By:

>>109022917

I did not say otherwise, did I ?

This wasn't a knee-jerk "DE is god game HR is shit post". At least I think I clearly presented my opinion that both game offered disappointments on that front.

Still I do think not taking into account a good portion of the player base people *would* want to make a Terminator run of that commissariat is a rather glaring lapse..

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:54:00 No.109023647 Report

Quoted By: >>109024471

so, I killed that anonymous x guy, are there going to be repercussions for this?

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 2011-09-03_00002.jpg, 2MiB, 5000x1042

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:54:00 No.109023648 Report

Quoted By: >>109026772

QUICKLY MEN, THERE MAY BE AN INTRUDER. GROUP TOGETHER SO WE CAN MAKE A PLAN.

>what's her name in Detroit calls in the guards
>toss out a gas grenade
>sprint into and through the vents
>punch the last guy

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:54:00 No.109023683 Report

Quoted By: >>109024611

>>109023369

>Kill scores of Powder Gangers
>You have gained Karma!
>Steal ammo and food for their metal containers
>YOU HAVE LOST KARMA
>YOU HAVE LOST KARMA
>YOU HAVE LOST KARMA
>YOU HAVE LOST KARMA

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:55:00 No.109023713 Report

Quoted By:

>work in a highly sophisticated military/science research lab
>make the panels use number codes
>the panels are easily lifted up and easily hackable by electronic shock

fuckin are you serious

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO vlcsnap-2011-08-31-08h46m39s19.png, 170KiB, 361x348

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:56:00 No.109023799 Report

Quoted By:

>>109023531
>>109023531

that was very well written, anon

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:57:00 No.109023916 Report

Quoted By:

>Become a self sufficient machine
>Lose ability to grab people
Fuck this shit. The one thing that really irritates me.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 04:58:00 No.109024017 Report

Quoted By: >>109024336

Why when you log on to these computers are the peoples emails sitting open?

Shouldn't they time out or some shit?

The whole world must love emails

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:00:00 No.109024182 Report

Quoted By: >>109024501

So I play to do a playthrough where I kill everyone it is possible to.

Is this viable?

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO hurr durr.png, 15KiB, 300x300

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:01:00 No.109024289 Report

Quoted By:

>have goddamn fists of steel that could knock anyone out
>can't punch anyone though cause i didn't eat any chocolate today
>mfw

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:01:00 No.109024336 Report

Quoted By: >>109024418 >>109024599

>>109024017
in the future the only thing computers can do is check emails or turn on or off security systems

I have no idea why my post is considered rude fucking 4chan

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:02:00 No.109024418 Report

Quoted By: >>109024548

>>109024336
u butthurt?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:03:00 No.109024471 Report

Quoted By: >>109024526

>>109023647
why did you kill him?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:03:00 No.109024501 Report

Quoted By:

>>109024182
it's entirely possible

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:03:00 No.109024526 Report

Quoted By:

>>109024471
Because he was a summerfag.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1312681893351.jpg, 20KiB, 447x313

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:03:00 No.109024540 Report

Quoted By: >>109024601

>have bionic fuck-arms with which I could easily crush a man's trachea or masturbate a dinosaur
>noisily bifurcate people with pointless elbow swords

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:03:00 No.109024548 Report

Quoted By:

>>109024418
fuck yea I'm butthurt

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:04:00 No.109024599 Report

Quoted By: >>109024779

>>109024336

Because you're posting something that is filtered. Mostly likely you are posting 'butthurt' without dodging the filter, though there are other filtered phrases.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:04:00 No.109024601 Report

Quoted By:

>>109024540
the coolness factor, man, the coolness factor

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:04:00 No.109024611 Report

Quoted By:

>>109023683

>Not modding New Vegas to fix this shit and more

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:05:00 No.109024719 Report

Quoted By: >>109024886 >>109027271

>Hengsha port
>shoot belltower
>he comes running
>go back to whole in the security fence cover it with giant crate
>sees me do this
>Turns around "I lost him!"

The AI in this game is laughable.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:06:00 No.109024763 Report

Quoted By: >>109024859

>Work at LIMB
>Risk my life to get some files on a dead girl for some hot pilot bitch
>Some auged guy comes in
>"Death and Life have their determined appointments"
>What the fuck man, where's the chick
>Give the guy the evidence
>Ask him for payment
>He runs off and calls me a retard

FUCKING WESTONERS

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:06:00 No.109024779 Report

Quoted By: >>109025149

>>109024599
that's my original message tho, I don't see what warrants a filter

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1291666226895.png, 10KiB, 429x410

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:06:00 No.109024823 Report

Quoted By: >>109025482 >>109025722 >>109026983 >>109027715 >>109031155

WHY DOES PRITCHARD HATE ME

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:06:00 No.109024841 Report

Quoted By:

>Store an upgrade for a weapon upgrade in my garage
>come back to get it
>garage is open
>no upgrade in sight
I BET IT WAS THAT DAMN GWEILO

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:07:00 No.109024859 Report

Quoted By:

>>109024763
you actually used the password? I just said "nice hat"

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:07:00 No.109024886 Report

Quoted By: >>109025041

>>109024719

AI in sneaking games is always terrible in the original Deus Ex as well.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:08:00 No.109024992 Report

Quoted By: >>109025259

>frenzied augmented people going nuts
>crowd of 30 standing in a hallway
>on a mission to fix everyone again
>don't kill any of them cause they can't do anything about it
>5 minutes later, 30 unarmored guys all standing in a hallway and i just got 200 rounds for my gatling gun
>can't resist the urge
>open fire
>everyone screaming and running towards me
>mow everyone down
>corpses errywhere
>felt kinda good man
>i'm supposed to be the good guy

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:08:00 No.109025041 Report

Quoted By: >>109025281

>>109024886
Nah man, nah.
Check any Splinter Cell game.
Or Hitman.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:09:00 No.109025077 Report

Quoted By: >>109025403 >>109025909

>Use new chip to turn of augmentations
>not disable health regen
also http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=Y414Q7vVgYU

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:09:00 No.109025080 Report

Quoted By:

>Work at a secret military bunker
>Have tight network security and private mail account
>Still get spam mail from Nigerian Bank
>Wat

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:10:00 No.109025149 Report

Quoted By:

>>109024779

Yeah, it's kinded of fucked at times. I have been banned twice for posting a prohibited URL, both times while I have been talking about B&K: Nuts and Bolts, both times my posts contained no links.

I don't fucking know, man.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:11:00 No.109025259 Report

Quoted By:

>>109024992
>augs gone crazy
>fuck man, theyre just civilians ill just let them live
>end up destroying panchea killing all of them anyways
>all dat ammo i never used

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:11:00 No.109025281 Report

Quoted By: >>109025473

>>109025041

That's because the AI is scripted as fuck in those games.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:12:00 No.109025356 Report

Quoted By:

>Minding my own business in Hengsha
>Some robocop guy lands right in front of me shitting yellow rays out of his ass
>As if i give a fuck
>continue minding my own business

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:12:00 No.109025403 Report

Quoted By: >>109026164 >>109026421 >>109031464

>>109025077
>he didn't anticipate that the chip was a trap
laughingaugs.jpg

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:13:00 No.109025439 Report

Quoted By:

>be janitor
>keep loaded machine pistol and grenades in unlocked locker

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:13:00 No.109025457 Report

Quoted By:

>in china
>military base
>gate is closed
>the control for the gate is on the outside
>all the soldiers are on the inside
WHATTHEFUCK!!!!
also, spamming the open/close button and watch the prick by the door spaz out, push open, he walk out, push close just as he goes through the door, the door closes and he pops back in to the other side.

Fucking bugs yo.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:13:00 No.109025472 Report

Quoted By: >>109030229

http://forums.eidosgames.com/showpost.php?p=1674466&postcount=1

Oooooooooooooohhhh lovely.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:13:00 No.109025473 Report

Quoted By:

>>109025281
And looking at both results, I'm sticking to my scripting. Besides, the Hitman AI is not that scripted. The places are always small sandboxes, so you can't prepare a response for everything.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:13:00 No.109025482 Report

Quoted By:

>>109024823
Because hes surrounded by idiots, and his tv pilot was refused
NUCLEAR SNAKE HACKER EXTRAORDINAIRE

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:15:00 No.109025722 Report

Quoted By:

>>109024823
Because he's rear devastated after you return and start doing your job better than he ever did.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:17:00 No.109025909 Report

Quoted By:

>>109025077
Good to know I'm not the only one that made Jensen dance while in cover.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:19:00 No.109026097 Report

Quoted By:

>be augmented superhuman marine
>nigh invulnerable to bullets, endless supply of grenades, minigun for arm
>feel fucking invincible
>some asshole who wears sunglasses indoors infiltrates my government facility
>challengeaccepted.jpg
>get tased repeatedly
>shit myself and die

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:20:00 No.109026164 Report

Quoted By:

>>109025403
Please tell me you're a fucking troll, just because you anticipate something to be a trap there's no reason to bypass the whole fucking story segment every time, stop being a dipshit.

Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:22:00 No.109026370 Report

Quoted By:

>>109018090
>ting tong medical
Lost it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:22:00 No.109026412 Report

Quoted By:

>install security lock on door
>fill it with spam, viruses and money
>makes sense

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:22:00 No.109026421 Report

Quoted By:

>>109025403
>play a game with branching story
>take the same path every time
gigglinghomosexuals.tiff

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:25:00 No.109026688 Report

Quoted By:

>fellow colleague at Detroit police station has same name as the guy from robo cop
>tell him about it
>goes over his head
>wake up in vent

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:26:00 No.109026772 Report

Quoted By:

>>109023648
>Guards rush into room, group around one guy
>Clear leader is giving orders and plan of attack
"Oh we'll be having none of that shit"
>Snipe leader in the back of the head
>Squad falls into chaos.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:28:00 No.109026983 Report

Quoted By:

>>109024823
Pritchard hates EVERYONE. Here's why: >>109014024

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:29:00 No.109027094 Report

Quoted By:

>whistle catchy tune to myself
>"der da da der der..."
>guy in a coat stares at me for a bit
>wake up in a vent

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO thecommander.jpg, 7KiB, 256x340

SpoilerClick to view

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:30:00 No.109027252 Report

Quoted By:

>>109016124
I know the commander, because he's my pal.

Here's a picture.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:30:00 No.109027271 Report

Quoted By: >>109027738

>>109024719

Its honestly not that bad. I really liked how the faggot DRB and Harvesters and other kiddies would act like retards. They'd walk in one direction without turning around or checking corners, walk off alone, and just in general be fuck stupid assholes. But the spec ops guys actually had pretty good AI. They'd constantly scan the room and look behind them, as well as flanking and throwing grenades and shit. Not the best AI ever, but it was good that they gave them a difference in skill and training

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:34:00 No.109027712 Report

Quoted By:

>Big tough guy barges into my apartment.
>He wants the money I owe Tong for my augment.
>Tries to convince me to pay up nicely.
>I tell him no and that if he wants it he has to take it.
>He whispers,"Okay." Taps me on the shoulder and slugs me hard. Black out.
>Wake up in my bed.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:34:00 No.109027715 Report

Quoted By:

>>109024823
He's just mega tsundere. That and Jensen keeps screwing about in offices that don't belong to him and making all the dumbasses freak out and throw their pocket secretaries containing their passwords around the place blindly.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1298764630439.png, 7KiB, 274x242

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:35:00 No.109027738 Report

Quoted By:

>>109027271

>mfw guard conversations in this game are hilarious

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:37:00 No.109028003 Report

Quoted By:

That one part in Tai Young Medical where you see two guards talking about a falling vending machine was awesome. Out of all the cold and stern people in Hengsha Island, two guards treated me in a friendly manner.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO DentonNeedsaNewmirror.jpg, 190KiB, 1680x1050

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:43:00 No.109028597 Report

Quoted By: >>109028851

Just gonna leave this here

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:43:00 No.109028653 Report

Quoted By:

OOOOOOH AUGMENTED SECURITY OFFICER
WITH YOUR HEART SOOOOOO METALLIC
ADAM JENSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN

OOOOOOH YOUR PAST WAS LEAKED BY YOUR BOSS
OFFICER WITH THE SHADES
ADAM JENSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:45:00 No.109028851 Report

Quoted By:

>>109028597
At least we could see something there.
UNLIKE THE NEW ONE

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:46:00 No.109028888 Report

Quoted By:

>browsing #chan
>some whore calls me asking for a favour
>risk getting fired and possibly being arrested or killed in hopes of losing my virginity
>go to work
>some heavily neuroaugmented american pig comes up to me while I'm trying to do my job
>asks me about the report I promised that girl
>doesnt even get the phrase right
>tell him to meet me outside
>he finally meets me after half an hour
>give him the report and manage to get a thousand credits out of him
>wake up in an air vent with all my money missing
>go home and continue browsing #chan
>I hope she calls me again someday

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:47:00 No.109029009 Report

Quoted By:

>guard duty with 2 other guys
>hear some strange noise
>notice 1 of the others is gone
>think nothing of it
>hear another strange noise
>notice both of them are gone
>pretend it didn't happen and go back to guarding an unlocked door

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:48:00 No.109029097 Report

Quoted By: >>109029180

>Be Harvester
>Paid to attack some faggots VTOL
>Unloading on it
>FULLY AUGMENTED MAN CHARGES IN LIKE THE DOGS OF HADES
>HOLY FUCKING SHIT I HEARD HE WAS A PACIFIST WHY IS HE KILLING US ALL!?
>I lie on the ground dying
>The last word I hear are "Any time Fly Girl"

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1314923545403.jpg, 40KiB, 626x543

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:49:00 No.109029180 Report

Quoted By:

>>109029097

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:50:00 No.109029292 Report

Quoted By:

>Robot in Ping-Pong Medical
>Patrolling a hallway
>Turn around and run into a box
>Turn around again and stop patrolling
>20 years later, box is moved
>Turn around and continue patrolling

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO so_much_win.png, 53KiB, 477x599

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:51:00 No.109029421 Report

Quoted By:

this thread

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:53:00 No.109029622 Report

Quoted By:

>working security at TYM
>one of the other guards telling me how he almost got himself flattened by a vending machine yesterday
>returns to his patrol
>hear a loud noise
>go to investigate
>turn the corner to find him crushed by a soda machine
how pointlessly tragic

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 2011-08-27_00014.jpg, 103KiB, 1366x768

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:53:00 No.109029637 Report

Quoted By: >>109029890

>Not using a wallpaper you screencapped yourself.

I am so proud of this.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:56:00 No.109029890 Report

Quoted By: >>109030130 >>109030165

>>109029637
>screencap for a wallpaper
>that resolution
>that quality

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:59:00 No.109030130 Report

Quoted By:

>>109029890
It resizes a lot better, I admit, the quality is poor as shit, but it's taken from a cutscene.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 05:59:00 No.109030165 Report

Quoted By:

>>109029890
the ingame videos are shit quality

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 06:00:00 No.109030229 Report

Quoted By:

>>109025472
>install debug menu
>load last level
>infinite energy
>stealth and silent running aug
>keep them on 24/7
>complete level and final battle so fucking easy
>GET FOXIEST OF THE HOUNDS AND PACIFIST ACHIEVEMENT
HAHA OH WOW

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 06:03:00 No.109030546 Report

Quoted By:

>guarding the docks
>just doin' my job
>patrollin' with bros
>just got a new sentry bot
>looks pretty cool
>hear locked gate open
>turn around
>hear gunshots
>sentry bot is shooting all of my bros
>feel a prick at my neck
>wake up two days later, all of my bros dead, starting to rot.
>suicide.jpg

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 06:04:00 No.109030650 Report

Quoted By: >>109030771

>304 posts
>This thread will die soon
I never asked for this.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 06:05:00 No.109030771 Report

Quoted By:

>>109030650
>add it to favourates on chanarchive.com so you can find it again
>post this same thread in two weeks
>copy things from this thread and samefag until other people post
>archived 300post thread again

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 06:10:00 No.109031155 Report

Quoted By:

>>109024823

YFW Pritchard and you just have sarcastic conversations and are really bros.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 04 Sep 2011 06:13:00 No.109031464 Report

Quoted By:

>>109025403

> He doesn't think I knew about the chip but I wanted to get that optional part of the quest done
> He thinks that Namir was hard to kill with fuzzy screen mode
>Implying I didn't want to get rid of the annoying screeching

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