Once again, very sick of sadfrog threads....
Let's have a funny shit related green-story thread

If you were a knight in a fantasy setting of your choosing, what would you do?

I'd save damsels. Damsels love to be saved.

>for two weeks have painfull lump inside nostril
>keep trying to squeeze it but to no avail
>eventually it just dissapears
>the next day
>have weird pimple on my nose, on the Outside of where the lump was on the inside
>squeeze it ever so gently
>it explodes with blood and puss, and a quater inch long nose hair
>my nose hair was ingrown in my fucking nose, and eventually CAME OUT THROUGH THE OTHER SIDE

that fucked with my mind a little, the hair was really hard as well, like a little piece of wire.

ITT:General elementary school stories
>First Grade
>We are all required to take a spelling test to test our spelling levels
>there are many simple words such as "The", "cat", "dog", "a" and "I" (No fucking joke, they actually has them on there"
>Most kids misspell "a" and "I" because it may be a trick question
>Our reaction when they were in no way a trick

American public schools can be shit at times

>wiggle wiggle..

Anybody here grow up with violent, crazy, or just plain senseless parents/guardians?

How has it effected you as a person? Are you stronger, or weaker because of it?

Sit down and let all your feels out, /r9k/. We're hear to help.

>that feel when you're even friend-zoned on the internet

Do people from North Carolina and South Carolina or North Dakota and South Dakota, wish they were one state. People from Virginia are usually glad that West Virginia is no longer part of our state, but I've wondered about the other states. How do people in West Virginia feel by the way?

Post "that story". You know, the fucking craziest experience in your life story that you tell everyone.

It has to be true, and could be from any topic ranging from drugs, the paranormal, car accident, etc.

Anyway, here's mine:

>be 15
>live in Kent, Washington. Its a really ghetto place.
>at the gas station
>sitting on a bench waiting for my drugdealer to come
>some 10 feet in front of me, an expensive looking blue car with shiny nigger rims is driving out
>suddenly a dirty looking jeep t-bones the blue car intentionally
>crash is intense
>as dust cloud is still settling and hubcaps still rolling, two doors slam simultaneously
>out of the blue car comes out this huge scary forrest whitakker looking nigga
>from the jeep this little black guy with dreads comes out
>lil jeep guy starts strafing the huge forrest whitaker guy, shaking fists and going "come at me nigga"
>BOOM big black guy knocks this dude out in one punch
>big black guy gets on top of lil guy, starts punching him in the face as hard as he can
>flips him over on the ground, and starts SMASHING HIS HEAD AGAINST THE CONCRETE
>meanwhile across the street, FAT AS FUCK black guy with a REVOLVER starts waddling across the street through traffic
>apparently this guy is the little black guy's friend

to be continued in next post

The reason why women are such whores is because they can get laid literally ANYTIME they want with nearly anyone they want so they have the option of acting on EVERY single impulse they EVER have. NO man can or ever will have this option. This is the real defining difference between men and women. It's why women are less rational and less trustworthy and more irresponsible.

I know that you white knights are already typing up a response, but keep in mind that I'm just explaining why these differences exist and what the root cause of women's whorish dishonest behavior is.

Now if you want the ultimate proof of women's ability to do literally ANYTHING they want at ANY time they want to do it then just watch this video. And keep in mind that the woman in the clip is NOT a pornstar. She's just a paid extra that decided to act on an impulse like ALL women are capable of doing at ANY time they want. And knowing that this was going to be permanently preserved on the internet didn't even stop her. If she was a man and she had tried to do the same thing to a female stripper then she would have been arrested for sexual asault and might have had to register as a sex offender for the rest of her life. But since she's a woman, well... Just see for yourself.

http://efukt.com/20963_Bad_Times_At_The_Bachelorette_Party.html