Update 2024-03-27: Greatly expanded the "Samples" page and renamed it to "Glossary".
Update 2024-04-04: Added 5 million mid-2011 posts from the k47 post dump. Browse (mostly) them here.
Update 2024-04-07: Added ~400 October 2003 posts from 4chan.net. Browse them here.

Welcome to Oldfriend Archive, the official 4chan archive of the NSA. Hosting ~170M text-only 2003-2014 4chan posts (mostly 2006-2008).

Threads by latest replies - Page 2

[1395362728] The gun is good! The penis is evil!

No.455808 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
Zardoz speaks to you, his chosen ones.

You have been raised up from brutality, to kill the brutals who multiply, and are legion. To this end, Zardoz - your God, gave you the gift of the gun.

The Penis shoots seeds, and makes new life to poison the earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death and purifies the earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth, and kill! Zardoz has spoken.

[1303691950] The Stock Market

No.352395 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
The only people who are directly effected by the stock market are people who own stocks/shares. In other words: people who don't work. People who gain and lose money based on other people's work.
11 posts omitted

[1389488336] I can't send you VIPCOINS

No.454649 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
But I can send you doge coins.

One free dogecoin to all who post.
16 posts omitted

[1396171597] /lounge/ nostalgia thread

No.455895 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
DRIVE LIKE JEHU
Listen here, jerkface
KIKES KIKES KIKES KIKES [...]
Tsk.
The Pleasure of Being Cummed Inside
sure why not?
the fuck on
SPAM DRINK COCA COLA FOR THAT REFRESHING BROWNESS
fail. GTFO
Jackson 5 get
I fucking hate when people say _____ so kindly shut up.
BOOMPSY
I dream of cocks drifting across the blue sky.
bam ba lam
Way to bump a five year old thread
████████████████████████████████
You're an anus!

Have I missed any?
13 posts omitted

[1396064184] Taoism Fail

No.455879 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
Taoism is a philosophy that people have made into a fullblown religion. It's a simple philosophy: There is no evil, because everything is a natural part of life. Taoism is founded upon a renounciation of the teachings of Confucious, who invented virtues and sins after his own whims. Taoism is ethical anarchy.

It seems easy to understand as a concept. The founder of taoism, Lao Tzu, wasn't a holy man. He was a simple librarian who was fed up with working for Confucius. One would think that at least a handful of people would understand what Lao Tzu was saying.

Nope.
Todays taoism is about reading his book, interpreting its phrases, wondering what they mean, and thinking it's all very mystical and wonderous. "Don't be a faggot." is some sort of ultimate wisdom from a grand sage, that people can only hope to get a glimpse of.

This may seem funny enough, but to really understand the bizarre, we have to look at taoism online.
4chan is a pretty taoist forum already where everything that is allowed to be permitted, is permitted.
However, official taoist forums, are not taoist forums. Quite the opposite.
Besides the general forum PC rules that every forum has copied and pasted from eachother, every post also has to be nice, popular and express a politically correct view. These are forums that would permaban Lao Tzu himself for "promoting immorality". In the end everyone has to basically already agree with eachother, which runs contrary to spiritual progress within taoism. With discussing the validity of immoral views banned, the activities are confined to quoting the Tao Te Ching, screwing around, and small-talking: Drivel.
9 posts omitted

[1392746377] How to make my small penis big!

No.455329 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
I got a small smelly penis how can i make it bigger! i need to be more than 1 inch when hard!!!!

[1367904333] Help those in need

No.440828 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
Donate to Israeli charities. israelgives.org
5 posts omitted

[1396368923] Call of Cthulhu save

No.455940 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
In Call of Cthulhu, finding a mangled human corpse, is somewhat more shocking than witnessing a friend's violent death.

(The reason being that the save average is 9 compared to 7. 1D6 has an equal save average to 1D4+1. Add a 1 if you succeed on the save, and the average will be higher.)
3 posts omitted